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[quote=Anonymous]My brother cut off all contact with me a few days before my wedding 3 years ago because my mom convinced him I had banned her from attending (I didn't-she chose not to attend because I invited my father. They are divorced. He cheated and she hates him). Brother took mom's side and she convinced him not to go out of loyalty to her.

I have tried reaching out to my brother for 3 years now. I tried calling and texting a few times those first couple months, until I realized he was ignoring me. I now only contact him via snail mail a handful of times a year (birthday cards, Christmas, etc.). He has a young child and I have sent cards with checks as a gift but they never get cashed.  I don't know if he even opens the things I send.

A few months ago, as a last ditch effort, I tried sending an apology letter to him. It was hard because I know he 100% without question believes the lies my mom has told him about me, and in the past when I've tried to tell him they are lies and show him proof he says I'm a liar and manipulator and how dare I disrespect my mother. So in the letter I couldn't really address things head on because it would only be treated as me lying again. I tried just telling him that I was sorry for how my choices had affected him and that I still loved him and he would always be my brother.

Am I crazy for continuing to contact him via mail? Will he really go the rest of our lives without talking to me? We are in our 30s, that seems like such a long time.

I guess my hope is if I keep showing him that I love him and that I exist, but in a non-aggressive way (that's why I only use mail and only a handful of times a year), maybe someday something will change. [/quote]

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