Reply to Parent passed away 5 years ago, Spouse thinks I need more therapy for closure?!

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[quote=Anonymous]I lost my mom to cancer when I was a teenager.   I'm now nearly 50, and I'll share with you that one of the most important things I've learned is that grief is a process.  My most helpful therapist described it to me as "the only way past it is through it".

I'm only an Internet stranger, but from way over here it strikes me that you've had a lot of loss in a very young life and the way you speak of it as something that is over and won't happen again strikes me as someone who perhaps has dealt with it by ignoring it rather than processing it.  I say this with care, not judgement, as I've been in similar circumstances.  I'm incredibly sorry for what you've been through, and I agree with your dh that it could be helpful to speak to a grief counselor and see if you have some more processing to do.

You only briefly mention your mom leaving, and I don't know what impact that had, but you might want to check out the book Motherless Daughters by Hope Edelman.  I felt a lot less alone about not having a mom after reading it.  You might find it helpful as well.   [/quote]

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