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[quote=Anonymous]The only important question is, can you treat this child decently for the next 18 years?

If you will think and act toward the child with resentment or contempt, those are natural feelings, but you need to exit the picture immediately. You can get another husband, but this is that child's biological parent. Even if the mom marries the perfect step-dad tomorrow, there's so much pain possible for this child if you keep the bio dad away.

If you can act consistently with basic decency toward this child, I think you are a saint. And you may even find that you genuinely care for him or her.

But the chances of this are astronomically small. Much better odds that if you divorce now, without much fuss, there will be at least 4 happier people in a year and for many years to come.

Whatever you do, don't rush to get pregnant. I have a friend from college. She reconciled with DH and ended up with a baby less than 9 months younger than his love child half-sibling. They attend the same jr. HS. It's socially very awkward. [/quote]

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