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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I really want to keep this off the explicit board because I feel I will get better and more diverse answers and opinions here.  So I will keep the language clean.

I am a married male in my mid 40's.  Married 20 years.  My wife has a higher libido or drive than I do, so that is not an issue.  However I feel that she is too vanilla.  I'm not interested in anything crazy, just more than me on top or her on top.  I would love me behind, but she is self-conscious about me looking at her butt.  She says that position doesn't feel personable because she can't face me.  How do I spice it up a little?  I feel like we get in a rut.  We have kids 16 and 12.  After 20 years, is it too late to bring her out of her shell, or am I the one in the wrong?  I feel like we aren't meshing physically, even though the frequency is good.[/quote]

Try doing her from behind while she's looking in a mirror at you.[/quote]

+1 learned this in a hotel bathroom. We also did a magazine list once to get out of a rut...it was one of those "10 positions to blow his mind" types of things and it seemed less of a reach when it was just trying to complete the list.[/quote]

OP here.  She has a high drive, but doesn't want to venture outside of 2 positions.  A mirror would be considered too crazy for her, as would 10 positions.[/quote]

PP here. I'm going to go back to my earlier advice to shift her a little when you're in the act. You can start to subtly change positions like that, even by moving her legs around. It's small but it's a start. I love when DH does that. Would she be receptive if you take control and do it rather than asking? If DH asked, "would you mind if i..." it wouldn't be as appealing as if he just did it. I can still say no if I don't like it, but I (and a lot of other women too) like when a man takes control. And if you can find something that feels good, it might be easier to try new things.

Or she might never get past the two positions she likes. At least she'll get on top. Some guys don't even get that. [/quote]

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