Reply to Spouse/kids excluded from family event

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[quote=Anonymous]There really is no more to the story.  There was no fight and no comments. BIL and SIL and kids came to our engagement party, wedding, baby shower.  They see us at other funerals, weddings, baby showers, bar mitzvahs.  They always seemed to snub me a bit (since that first meeting) and never got to know me but never purposefully were mean.

They just never bothered to get to know me or our kids and seemed annoyed the one time I visited LA with my husband but no drama.

I feel like it's a big deal if DH goes without me.  All his comments make it clear that is what he wants -- me to just be okay with him going by himself, give him permission, have him make up with his brother, and go by himself.  But then what happens next year (his niece is 11 so her bat mitzvah is next year) and what do we do when our 6 & 8 year olds have their bat mitzvahs?

I'm afraid that I'll resent DH if he goes to this sevent without me after it was made clear that I was excluded or that he'll resent me if he misses it.  Either way, how will our marriage be the same?  We have both been living with our heads in the sand, I guess, but his brother never said anything and hindsight is 20/20.[/quote]

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