Reply to Spouse/kids excluded from family event

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Spouse/kids excluded from family event"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]BIL and DH were very close until BIL met me (10 years ago when we were dating).  BIL never said anything specific and we rarely see him together (just family events) so it never mattered that much.  BIL and DH still spoke on the phone and DH visits BIL.  I visited once but I didn't feel welcome (told to stay home with nanny and their kids while BIL and DH went out and SIL saw own friends).  BIL never visited DH after that visit (although visited once a year before then) and doesn't know our kids well (family events once a year or so).

Now BIL's son has a bar mitzvah next month.  It was strange when we didn't get an invitation so I asked DH to call BIL who said "don't worry, you're invited".  Immediately, I knew something was up.  But DH insisted that the "you" meant all 4 of us.  So I asked DH to RSVP for all of us and BIL then explained that DH was invited but the kids and I are not.  DH was upset so BIL said "fine, you can bring the kids but this is about my son and not about you."  When DH insisted that I be included, BIL said DH was making the event about him so he isn't invited either.

DH then asked his parents to get involved (huge mistake) and now his parents are saying that they don't understand why DH can't just go by himself, and that I (who hasn't said anything) was making a big deal about a half-day event (it's in LA so a full weekend but they think I should fly out and just stay at the hotel). DH says he doesn't care about the bar mitzvah (although he is close to his nephew because of all those extra visits) but over the past week has mentioned how close he was with his BIL before meeting me, and how even his parents supported him more before me), and he's been moping around the house.

It's crazy and I didn't think this is where the post was going but it's like I know that our relationship will never be the same again.  DH loves me and the kids less now.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics