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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just said "it's obvious you need some space to handle your feelings. I hope your day gets better". And hung up the phone. I know not to engage. Something tells me MIL will call into work for that morning. Then we will be expected to be home by 4. [/quote]

Wait -- OP, is this you? So your problem is not just SIL (who, yes, is being selfish), but MIL as well?

You say "MIL will call into work." Do you mean she will BE called in to work by her boss? Or she, herself, will "call into work" to see if she is needed?

If she works a job where her employer can call on her in the morning to work later that same day, she shouldn't say yes to plans that are on any day she is officially on call at her job. And you and DH should be crystal clear that she arranges a vacation day well in advance for any day you want to take her somewhere.

If she, herself, would somehow "call into work" on her own and see if she is needed when she does not have to do so -- well, DH should talk to her about how that's not a thoughtful thing to do if she has been part of plans made specially as an outing to please her.

You said this is a two-hour drive, the in-laws can't leave until 11:30 and might need to be back by 4 if MIL works -- If I read it right. If this is a day trip (not clear to me that it is or isn't, I'm assuming it is) you would drive two hours, then pretty much have 30 minutes at the destination before coming home for 4:00--? It's all pretty confused now, and in your shoes, I'd just drop the plans and say you can reschedule when MIL can give you a date that is a firm, fixed vacation day that doesn't involve calling in to or being called in to work.

And don't ask SIL. If she invites herself, even if next time it would work, your DH (not you, him) should tell her, "We'd like to spend some time alone with mom and dad on this one. Later this summer we could all go to Place X as an extended family." Then do just that, go as a larger family later when everyone can PLAN around MIL's job and SIL's fixation with her husband's dinner.

Be glad DH has your back. You're smart not to engage. [/quote]

"Call in to work" usually means call in sick.  [/quote]

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