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[quote=Anonymous]This is a tough one.  I have a DH that often plays the devil's advocate on why something won't work and it drives me crazy.  I'm sure it drives him crazy but I will sometimes start with " I know you will say xyz, but this is why I think it could work". Start your pitch countering what he will say before he can say it.  This won't get him to spontaneously plan something or lead the charge but at least you won't feel like that character in Greek Mythology  that is always trying to roll a stone uphill to have it roll back down for all of eternity.

So with vacations, plan a budget that includes vacation and have direct deposit from your paycheck into the vacation savings account.  If you are a SAHM, maybe look into a part-time job for extra spending money that can be used for vacations and other extras.  Find out what is a good time or what time to avoid for vacations up front - maybe when you get the school calendar and go with that.  Or if he really likes to visit family, plan some time on your own with your and DH and kids and some time with family as part of your vacation.  I know some families will meet up at Hilton Head with each family with their own space or in our case we see extended family that lives in cool cities.  We mostly do our own thing but will spend a few days with cousins- enough for a fun trip and not wear out our welcome.  Yes, constantly negotiating and taking the lead is more work, but you can still move forward WITH the same spouse.  And I will admit sometimes the devil's advocate role does help temper some of my overly ambitious plans and leads to a better decision.[/quote]

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