Reply to TALK ME OUT OF IT! Thinking About Seducing a Friend...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]But I'm worried about ruining the friendship. What if out of guilt he just ignores me out and moves on with the new chick?
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Until you both decide either that there is nothing there or to be a couple there will always be the threat of the 20 year friendship changing.  If he gets serious about a girlfriend no way would she be cool with unrequited lust and sexual tension with his BFF.  So either on his own or with encouragement of his girlfriend, he may start spending less time with you - especially if you seem more into him than he is into you. Same other way around, if you get tired of waiting around for him to want to date you and you meet a guy that you really like and start to get serious with, he won't be cool with you lusting after your best guy friend.

[b]Are you sure it's not laziness that you don't want to have to date new people and go thru getting to know them?  Do you and this guy really have what it takes to be a long term romantic couple and if so, why did he start dating someone new when you were both were free to date? [/b] My advice is seducing him is a BS move like saying I was sooooo drunk and made out with so and so and if doesn't work out you can use alcohol as an excuse.  He needs to make a actual decision that he wants to make an effort to have a romantic relationship with you not fall into sex/be seduced by you while he is dating someone else.  You want to be a priority to him not an option and you don't want to be in a messy triangle where you don't know if you are the side chick, the FWB etc.  He can make a decision if what he has with you is worth taking it to the next level (and not continue dating the current person)  or if he prefers to be with the one he is dating.  You may not like the answer, but at least you will know if you are free to move on romantically and not hang around hoping to get a romantic scrap.[/quote]

It's not laziness. It's pure horniness. I'm definitely opening to meeting a nice guy and dating. But he's not here yet. However, my hormones are. And so is this buddy of mine.

Timing just never worked for us. When we were young and fooling around, I wasn't interested in marrying right out of college. He was, and that's exactly what he did. I moved on, married a bit later. Then we were both single. At that time he asked me about becoming a couple but I was dealing with a situation. In the time it took me to deal with that situation (more than a year), he met someone else. During that time it was brief Happy birthday/holiday texts. Then, I saw him recently. That's when he was clearly like "WHOA! Looking good!" and asked me again about the possibility of becoming a couple. That's when I decided I needed to know more about his "dating" situation first. Now here we are.

Anyway, thanks for the thoughtful reply. He's trustworthy, low hanging fruit in terms of why I'd want to screw him. It's just to satisfy a temporary itch. I haven't had any in over a year.[/quote]

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