Reply to Do you make plans for your high school aged children?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You mean like - your teenage kid invites 2 friends over for a sleepover.  The kids decide to go and see a movie. You think that's fine. While at the movie theater, one of the kids spots another friend that they know at the theater and leaves with that person. Your kid and the remaining friend watch the movie, look around for their friend after the movie and finally leave to go home. Later that kid gets busted for underage drinking.  That kid's parent blames you for it.

Or something like that?[/quote]

Thanks for the insightful, well thought out example.  OP here.  No, actually, if girls were at the mall and wanted (mostly one girl in particular) to meet with a boy, and the other parents flipped out on you[b] for their DC wanting to meet the someone of the opposite gender.[/b]  That DC parents tried to somehow put it on you, if they don't trust their own kid.

Another example, if the other parent tries to orchestrate activities based on who they want their kids to hang out with. Don't teens usually choose their own friends/activities, within reason?

This is all given that your child has not given you reason not to trust them, and this is how you do things, but you don't expect other parents to subscribe to your house rules (unless at your house, as PP stated).  What if the other parent starts coming down on you, for no reason (other than they need to mind their own)?

Hopefully I am making sense about a situation that makes no sense to me.  OP here. [/quote]

I still can't tell if I'd be upset. Not enough details. Mostly I want my kid to be honest with me about what's happening while she's out. I expect to know who she's with and what she's doing. Hanging out w/ a boy in a public place wouldn't bother me, as long as she wasn't sneaking around.  But I would expect HER to follow my rules, I sure wouldn't flip out on another parent. [/quote]

OP here.  Thanks, I agree, this is what I was thinking. Thought I was losing it - there is a lot of finger pointing where we live, lots of "appearances", which I stay out of, because it doesn't interest me.  If you don't trust your kid, take it up with them, for crying out loud.  I have also had one parent RSVP no and flip out when they saw a photo - you are the one that said no, no matter how many times I checked with you, so it is on you, not me.  Lots of this type of weirdness (weak efforts to misplace blame).  It's bizarre.  I think a lot of other parents know about it, because they tend to make themselves scarce. LOL. [/quote]

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