Reply to Teenage Brother Yet to Call or Acknowledge My 4 mo Baby's Birth

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[quote=Anonymous]I have a 17 yo brother. He lives with the rest of my family in Massachusetts (where I grew up). I had a baby about four months ago. My mom and sister (9 yo) drove down for the birth, but my brother needed to go to class - I was of course supportive of that. However, he never called. Never texted. Never messaged. Nothing. I texted him a picture of my son a couple of weeks after he was born, hoping to goad him into a conversation, and he replied with an "aw". THAT'S IT.

Some background - our father (long out of picture) was (is? who knows) a drug addict, is abusive, and because he was never around or lucid I essentially raised my brother for a good chunk of his youth while my mother worked multiple jobs. I eventually put myself through college, traveled pretty extensively, and now in my late twenties have a great career, loving partner, and new baby. One of my biggest motivators getting to where I am today was the hope that I could open up some doors for my siblings and make it easier for them than it was for me. But - my brother rejects the idea of college, insisted on going to a technical high school for a landscaping program, and doesn't feel the need to take the SATs or challenge himself academically in any way. He considers himself a "country boy" (even though he lives in Massachusetts  :roll: ). I'll admit that all of these things have led to a strained relationship for the past few years. Whenever I see him or talk to him, I try to encourage him to focus more on school and dream bigger (i.e. get the hell out of our hometown), mainly because I know that no one else does that for him; no matter how subtle I am, though, he takes it as a lecture and shuts down. So we don't talk as much anymore. In fact, ever since he came out (which I was thrilled about) and has been with his current boyfriend (who I am not thrilled about), he has been pretty much ignoring everyone.

I get that a lot of this is him being an angsty teenager. I really do. But my son? His first nephew? I mean, the fact that my brother can't pick up the phone to so much as acknowledge my son's existence REALLY F*CKING HURTS. So does the fact that my mother brushes it off and gives him a pass, claiming that she thinks he's too embarrassed now by the time that has passed to talk to me.

Am I being petty by not taking the high road and breaking the ice on this conversation with my brother? I'm just still so angry with him right now that I can't imagine the conversation going well.[/quote]

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