Reply to Overcompensating for lack of extended family relationships

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Overcompensating for lack of extended family relationships"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I can relate.  My only sibling is seven years older and the opposite gender and my parents moved several hundred miles from family before I was born.  My own kid is an only, all the grandparents are gone and cousins live at least an hour away.  We only see them every once in a while.

My first thought is that trying to overcompensate for anything is never a good idea.  My parents tried in various ways and for me, it just translated to their feelings being more important than my feelings.

Next, I always felt extra special when we did go and visit family because I was the "yankee cousin" and never tied in to family dramas.  There was a time when a few of my cousins tried very hard to make me feel like an outsider, but that dynamic happens at one point or another with all kids.  It was a little sad for me during big events like my wedding where so few of my family members showed up, but I feel a stronger connection to friends and others I've known since I was a kid.  My dad insisted on invites to every single family member, and it felt weird to me.

It would be nice to have stronger family ties, but I don't feel that our family of three is missing out.  Our kid feels very connected to our friends, whether they have kids or not.  They're all just as interested in him as a person, he looks forward to seeing them and they bring him gifts and we have fun gatherings and activities just as a family would.  When it gets right down to it, he'd still rather do the stuff he wants to do and that usually doesn't involve adults, family or not.

Don't overthink it.  He'll never miss it as much as you do.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics