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Reply to "Why does my Mother think she can hate me but have a relationship with my minor children?"
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[quote=Anonymous]I still allow a relationship between my kids, who are young, and my mother, who I suspect also has BPD and depression. She has always been horrible to me, but she is the only grandmother they have (and my father their only grandfather) and my kids, especially the 4yo, talk about them constantly. My parents don't visit (their choice) and we visit them around 3 times per year, but just for a quick overnight. We Skype with them every 6 weeks or so, and, in general, I (micro)manage the relationship (e.g., keep visits short, never allow my kids alone with her, open all boxes, interrupt/interject if the conversation is taking a turn or she says anything remotely harsh, etc.). I share no information with her other than superficial what-the-kids-have-been-doing stuff. It's working for now, but, as I said, my kids are young. Not sure I'll be able to make it work as my kids get older, but my parents are older so it may be a non-issue. [/quote]
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