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[quote=Anonymous]OP, thank you for your honesty, as your post probably was a difficult one to write and even harder to admit anywhere outside of an anonymous forum.  When I was in pre-term labor with my son, I "made a bargain with God" that if my son could just live, then I wouldn't complain or ask for or expect anything else.  DS has had a bumpy road and will never be the intellectual, athletic, socially savvy overachiever most parents secretly want, if for no other reason than to not feel the nagging pangs of guilt that "only if" I had done things differently, my child would have turned out better.  I still feel this guilt sometimes - from wondering what I could have done to prevent his pre-term birth, to having better care for him in the early days, to doing more early intervention, to encouraging more socialization (no matter how painful and even embarrassing peer interactions can be at times).  BUT, there is light at the end of the tunnel!  DS is now 11.  I love and accept him for the handsome, funny, quirky kid he is.  He has come a LONG way from his early days.  He still has his challenges, but he has done much better than we were told to expect.  Maybe we are the ones that have come a long way from the early days.  It is all a matter of perspective.  Every child is precious and has value.  We love our son and he adores us.  It makes me smile just to think of him :0).  Your DD is lucky to have a parent like you that is so smart and can navigate through what's best to help her.  And also that you care enough to admit your feelings (not "blame" DD somehow) and try to accept them.  I am a firm believer that you are given only that which you can bear.  Maybe, in all of your challenges and achievements, DD will be your greatest. [/quote]

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