Reply to On convincing spouse to be responsible with tax return / The art of compromising?

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[quote=Anonymous]My DH and I feel very differently about money. We made a list. I put all the things that were most important to me on my list. He put all the things that were most important to him on his list. My list looked a lot like yours - debt and retirement. His looked a lot like your DH's - some quality of life things, some fun things.

We then merged the lists. Without worrying about a specific amount of money, so don't do this in the sense of "we're allocating the tax refund." Ours was a ranked list. Some of his things moved up high, some of mine. When he saw things like "new floor mats for the car" next to "pay off credit card from replacing the tires 6 months ago, paying 12% interest" he could agree that maybe the credit card was a smidge higher. But when I saw that the top 3 priority items were all paying off bills, it made me a little more flexible when he fought hard for position #4 which was something like new pillows. Some quality of life things are important, and just because I can do without them doesn't mean he can.

Have you tried something like that?[/quote]

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