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[quote=Anonymous]MY DS (high school senior) decided to be incredibly rude to me lately. He is generally a good kid (decent grades, has a lot of friends, has not gotten into any trouble, and is generally a good "family citizen" -- takes care of things when we ask him to, watches his younger sibling without complaint when asked, keeps in touch when out , reasonably likes spending time with us etc). We generally don't have an antagonistic relationship. IN the last few weeks he has been lashing out at me with these obnoxious tirades, name calling, and generally inappropriate way of speaking (to anyone really, but especially to an adult). I am bit at a loss as to how to handle this (and yes, already feel like a total failure that I have allowed this to happen, so please don't pile on). I wish I could think of some consequence to impose but not sure if it will have any effect other than escalating the situation (I can't stop him from leaving the house since he is much bigger than I am; his allowance is pretty small and while I can withhold it he has his own money (from work and gifts from relatives); he needs his computer for work, and taking away his phone just seems silly at this point).  I am appalled and hurt that he thinks he can talk to me this way (It would never occur to me to talk like this to my parents). So, as an example, a few days ago he woke up in the morning and said he has a headache and wants to stay home from school. I said no. He continued to ask, over and over again, and I continued to say no, calmly for the first 5 or 6 times. Then after he asked 5 times and I said no 5 times, I raised my voice. That unleashed a interminable tirade about how awful I am, how rude I am, how he had to suffer this for 17 years, how I am "rude' to everyone, and on and on.  After a few min I just walked away (which as stressful since I needed to be in the kitchen to get everyone ready to leave for school and work). Anyway, then he comes home from school and acts as if nothing happened.  I told him I expected an apology from him, which led to another trade just like the one in the morning. I just kept my interaction with him to a minimum. But obviously this cannot continue, and is very unpleasant. I understand that he is stressed out about college admission and school work etc, but this is really unacceptable. [/quote]

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