Reply to My kids are not in the popular crowd

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your second post implies that you feel guilty that your kids are not popular. Being popular should not be a goal. It should be a by-product of being a nice kid.

[b]I live in SF now, where there's zero popularity.[/b]  Seriously, the kids who are disliked are the kids who are bullies or badly behaved in class here. And kids don't tease them. Any kid who bullies another kid is shut down by all the other kids. Kids are not picked on for wearing worn out clothes or pants that are too short or anything.  I'm from MD where popularity is A Thing, so this is a very interesting dynamic to observe.

I would focus on giving less power to popularity and focusing on the good friendships they've made and being good people.  You can't get into college because you had a lot of people at your Sweet 16, you know what I'm saying?[/quote]

Spoken like a parent! LOL
Of course there is popularity but you are an adult on the outside looking in and getting a filtered story from your kids so you have no idea what the true story is.

As to the OP's point, sometimes you do have to help your kid be more social. I think this especially matters when the child indicates they would like to be or are sad about not being.  They don't have to be popular to be social.  Encourage them to get some friends together to do something.  Invite them over to your house or suggest meeting for a movie.  At middle school age, yes, you as the parent still have to direct them in how to do this and be involved in setting up the logistics.  [/quote]

Nope, I've talked with teachers here who grew up in the NE so they know the type of popularity I do, talked with student teachers, talked with older (hs) kids, gotten to school early for pickup and watched. etc.  [/quote]

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