Reply to How to work on my relationship with MIL

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[quote=Anonymous]Why are you "desperate" for your kids to have a great relationship with your ILs? Seriously. Why?

My parents live in Florida, and my ILs are local. My kids see my parents a couple of times a year and are much closer to them than to ILs. They never have time or interest to spend time with our kids. My spouse isn't bothered by it, so I'm not bothered by it. I leave it up to spouse to facilitate their relationship.

OP--you have enough to manage with small kids. Don't take this on. I can't imagine wasting energy on "begging" anyone to come to my home. As PP noted, let your spouse take the lead on developing whatever relationship he sees fit.

When you visit with them, be polite. If comments such as the examples you provided are made, simply respond with a nod or "Yes." You don't need to engage them or defend your parenting.

You're not a teenageer who needs the head cheerleader's approval. You're an adult who is the head of a family. If someone, whether a grandparent or not, doesn't want to spend time with your family, it's their loss. Children all over the world grow up healthy and happy without having a close relationship with their grandparents.

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