Reply to FI not being supportive - am I doing too much?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Here's how I see this situation.

You and your fiance moved into a new home yesterday.  You were feeling stressed and overwhelmed.  There's no right or wrong to that, you just were.

It seems like your fiance's reaction to your feeling stressed was to get very defensive. To blame you for not doing x, y, and z.  And to even find reasons why he deserves to feel victimized and be nurtured by you.

Is this a pattern for him?  Because all he really had to do in this situation was give you a hug and tell you "It's okay babe, I'm here for you."  [/quote]

You hit it right on the head. That's really all I wanted. I just needed a hug and he say it would be ok. It would of been fine. It's just the blame, hurtful words, saying I need to "man up" and "get over it" is what has bothered me so much. Yes, this is normal. I tell him he is not emotionally supportive of me, he says he can't because I never do anything right and don't treat him like a king or the man of the house, so he won't treat me like a "queen."[/quote]

Oh girl, run.  Run far far away.  [/quote]

Take this as a red flag.

DH is like this: everything coming from him is a mix of criticism, blame or advice. Very hard to live as friends with such a partner. Address/ fix this or leave. I missed a big red flag because I was blindly in love. When we started living together, we shared an apartment with my friend. She was messy and forgetful because add. She really annoyed him. One day, he came back and found a drain unclogged the day before again blocked. He blamed her, she denied it, so he locked her out of the house at 10 pm and told her not to come back without drano. 
I wish I had noticed what a ball of anger he can be, that his punishments are way worse than the crime. Now we have a kid together. [/quote]

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