Reply to Advice for late 20s woman- stick through or move on

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So quick deets:

Late 20s womAn got involved with early 30s man from Match.com. Fit a lot of my criteria early on: God fearing, educated, into family, same culture. We started dating in Jan and [b]spoke about marriage very early[/b]. Met my parents too.

Fast forward to now: realize he's controlling, Not that affectionate, not flexible on many things, and is not at the point of wanting to get married. He's also having employment issues due to citizenship status.

I feel deep down we aren't that compatible, but Am scared of dating around too much...I just want to settle down for good. [/quote]

OP-you missed some big red flags. Talking about marriage "very early" is a big one. I'll bet my paycheck that he gave off signals that he was controlling and inflexible early on. But when you're fearful that you'll end up in your 30s and not married, you start to overlook these things. If you start from a place of confidence and look for things beyond whether he's educated or from the same culture, then you can catch these things. Now it's December and you're trying to get out of this.

Move on and stop worrying about whether you'll be married 8 years from now. That just makes you desperate and fearful. People rarely make their best decisions when they're in that state of mind. Hold your expectations high for how someone treats you. [/quote]

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