Just curious....

post reply Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
[Post New]09/08/2018 11:10
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:For those who say "No", what's your end game? Do you stick it out for the rest of your lives? Do it for the kids? IMO, doing it for the kids I understand, but for how long? Some things need to have their end, kids or not. JMO.


The end game is basically try to feel better, every day. It's almost an empty nest, and I've thought about walking away, but we're a great family and I would miss the togetherness, and I think even as young adults my kids would be deeply affected by divorce. So basically I put the family above my own personal happiness. Some days are good, some days it's crushing. It is what it is. (DH fwiw)
[Post New]09/08/2018 11:14
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Anonymous
50% No...50% Yes
[Post New]09/08/2018 11:14
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:For those who say "No", what's your end game? Do you stick it out for the rest of your lives? Do it for the kids? IMO, doing it for the kids I understand, but for how long? Some things need to have their end, kids or not. JMO.


The end game is basically try to feel better, every day. It's almost an empty nest, and I've thought about walking away, but we're a great family and I would miss the togetherness, and I think even as young adults my kids would be deeply affected by divorce. So basically I put the family above my own personal happiness. Some days are good, some days it's crushing. It is what it is. (DH fwiw)


I am a remarried DH (cheating ex). I feel you, brother, and I commend you for it. I know it's not easy.
[Post New]09/08/2018 13:39
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No way. I’ve been married for 15 years. And about 5 years ago I found the woman I was meant to be with. I’m happy and content in my marriage but my heart is elsewhere.


Similar for me too. Hugs. Life in unpredictable.


I thought I could stick it out for the kids, but another 14 years until the youngest goes to college was to much. I’m leaving DH and starting a new life with the person I was meant to be with, my current AP. I would leave DH regardless, but feeling love again was the catalyst I need to move on. You don’t realize how important is it until you have it again.
[Post New]09/08/2018 15:52
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:If you could go back in time, would you still marry the same person you are currently married to? If no, why not?


No way.
[Post New]09/08/2018 16:29
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Anonymous
No. I totally settled.
[Post New]09/08/2018 16:31
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Anonymous
No
[Post New]09/08/2018 17:13
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No way. I’ve been married for 15 years. And about 5 years ago I found the woman I was meant to be with. I’m happy and content in my marriage but my heart is elsewhere.


Similar for me too. Hugs. Life in unpredictable.


I thought I could stick it out for the kids, but another 14 years until the youngest goes to college was to much. I’m leaving DH and starting a new life with the person I was meant to be with [my horoscope said so!], my current AP. I would leave DH regardless, but feeling love [finding something to desperately latch onto because I can't make it on my own] again was the catalyst I need to move on. You don’t realize how important is it until you have it again.

Good luck with that.
[Post New]09/08/2018 17:37
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:No. I knew he wasn’t right but he was such a good catch on paper. He’s not a bad person, but we just have very different values and lifestyles. Everything is a power struggle.


Same with me. I wouldn't marry him again because we have different views on everything but he's a really good person. He doesn't make me miserable or sad but we aren't really a team or partners. I've found other outlets to bring me happiness ( not affairs).
[Post New]09/08/2018 17:55
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ZachF
Member Offline
I wouldn't marry any of them
[Post New]09/08/2018 18:06
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Anonymous
Real life isn’t Princess Bride. 11:10 summed it up.
[Post New]09/08/2018 18:07
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Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Yes, because she is so much smarter than me it was my only chance for smart kids. Unlikely another smart woman would find me that attractive.


Personally, I’d rather have happy, average kids.
[Post New]09/08/2018 18:10
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Anonymous
Yes. She was uniquely wonderful.
[Post New]09/08/2018 18:18
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Anonymous
No. Incompatible sex desire is unsustainable.
[Post New]09/08/2018 18:30
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Anonymous
Yes. We met in our 30s. I only wish we'd met sooner so I could be with him through some awful things he endured in his 20s. He is an amazing dad. As a husband, he needs a lot of hints regarding stuff that doesn't ultimately matter ("boy, I really miss having flowers on the table"), but never regarding stuff that does.
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