Anonymous wrote:OP Does gaming cost money? Do you have to subsidize his habit with subscription fees or computer equipment? If so, I think you could insist he hold down a part-time job. Perhaps two four hour shifts a week at a Macdonalds/Baskin Robbins/Safeway etc. I agree that you can't force him to do a typical EC if he does not enjoy it but it is reasonable to expect him to learn some valuable life skills especially if he is spending a lot of time in an alternative reality. It will look good on his college application and it will get him out of his bedroom/basement and into the real world and teach him personal responsibility.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, he'll get a summer job cooking french fries. But that doesn't make him particularly compelling to any competitive colleges, right?

He shows no drive or enthusiasm for anything besides gaming. We couldn't afford any good summer camps or activities for him that his friends did. We sent him to the cheap county or federally funded stuff in middle school and he hated it and refuses to go to anything that's free or cheap anymore. Honestly they are really poorly run, so I stopped forcing him to go for the experience.

He has this idea he'll get into some competitive/selective colleges because of his grades and test scores, but I'm thinking that's not likely, and especially not likely for merit scholarships. State school is most likely?

If I had a kid like this, college admissions would be the last thing on my mind.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just lie on the applications.

How do they know he didn’t play sports outside of school or wasn’t part of some club or take lessons? They don’t.

My kid lied on his as he had zero interest in all that crap (much like yours, just liked video games) and guess what? He’s finishing his sophomore year at UVA as a biochem major. As long as you have the grades and test scores, that rest is fluff and filler that meant nothing 10-15 years ago.

And before someone is all ZOMG you raised a liar! Yep. I’d rather have a liar than a stressed out little robot that I read about on here a lot. Just lie. Simple as that.

I have a kid like that and I don't personally subscribe to this EC, charity work crap. It's not like this town is filled with Mother Theresa's. I know.

Can you give me some examples of what you can "get way with"? Need to start thinking about it.

What the actual f**k. Have some integrity.

Anonymous wrote:OK, he'll get a summer job cooking french fries. But that doesn't make him particularly compelling to any competitive colleges, right?

He shows no drive or enthusiasm for anything besides gaming. We couldn't afford any good summer camps or activities for him that his friends did. We sent him to the cheap county or federally funded stuff in middle school and he hated it and refuses to go to anything that's free or cheap anymore. Honestly they are really poorly run, so I stopped forcing him to go for the experience.

He has this idea he'll get into some competitive/selective colleges because of his grades and test scores, but I'm thinking that's not likely, and especially not likely for merit scholarships. State school is most likely?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just lie on the applications.

How do they know he didn’t play sports outside of school or wasn’t part of some club or take lessons? They don’t.

My kid lied on his as he had zero interest in all that crap (much like yours, just liked video games) and guess what? He’s finishing his sophomore year at UVA as a biochem major. As long as you have the grades and test scores, that rest is fluff and filler that meant nothing 10-15 years ago.

And before someone is all ZOMG you raised a liar! Yep. I’d rather have a liar than a stressed out little robot that I read about on here a lot. Just lie. Simple as that.

I have a kid like that and I don't personally subscribe to this EC, charity work crap. It's not like this town is filled with Mother Theresa's. I know.

Can you give me some examples of what you can "get way with"? Need to start thinking about it.

What the actual f**k. Have some integrity.

Anonymous wrote:I'm a teacher at an international school in Europe, so I help a lot of kids with the college app process for schools in both the US and EU.

In general, European universities don't care about extra curriculars. Many don't even have a place on their apps for this info. In fact, many European universities don't even ask for letters of rec from high school teachers, or state that letters of rec are optional.

So your kid could apply to European universities with no stigma for his lack of extra curriculars. Those unis are no-frills, and may not have rock-climbing walls or luxurious dorms, but you would save a ton of money and your kid would have a quality education.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK, he'll get a summer job cooking french fries. But that doesn't make him particularly compelling to any competitive colleges, right?

He shows no drive or enthusiasm for anything besides gaming. We couldn't afford any good summer camps or activities for him that his friends did. We sent him to the cheap county or federally funded stuff in middle school and he hated it and refuses to go to anything that's free or cheap anymore. Honestly they are really poorly run, so I stopped forcing him to go for the experience.

He has this idea he'll get into some competitive/selective colleges because of his grades and test scores, but I'm thinking that's not likely, and especially not likely for merit scholarships. State school is most likely?

Yes that job would be compelling. He is showing responsibility and initiative. He would be showing up to a job when he is supposed to, and this could lead to something else. Wouldn’t you rather have your son taking some responsibility rather than playing on the computer all summer? Assuming you are the OP. A job doesn’t have to be a research experience at NIH to have value. You sound so incredibly negative.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a teacher at an international school in Europe, so I help a lot of kids with the college app process for schools in both the US and EU.

In general, European universities don't care about extra curriculars. Many don't even have a place on their apps for this info. In fact, many European universities don't even ask for letters of rec from high school teachers, or state that letters of rec are optional.

So your kid could apply to European universities with no stigma for his lack of extra curriculars. Those unis are no-frills, and may not have rock-climbing walls or luxurious dorms, but you would save a ton of money and your kid would have a quality education.

Would you really save money? Can you name some (3-4) good ones?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a teacher at an international school in Europe, so I help a lot of kids with the college app process for schools in both the US and EU.

In general, European universities don't care about extra curriculars. Many don't even have a place on their apps for this info. In fact, many European universities don't even ask for letters of rec from high school teachers, or state that letters of rec are optional.

So your kid could apply to European universities with no stigma for his lack of extra curriculars. Those unis are no-frills, and may not have rock-climbing walls or luxurious dorms, but you would save a ton of money and your kid would have a quality education.

Would you really save money? Can you name some (3-4) good ones?

Yes, you would save a lot of money. The American kids I've known who went to EU schools have paid around 10k a year for tuition. Most also shared apartments with friends (more common in EU than dorms), and some did live in dorms, but even paying for this ended up being less than paying full tuition for a US school, or even, in some cases, a US school with aid.

Here's an article I found: https://www.mastersportal.com/articles/405/tuition-fees-at-universities-in-europe-in-2018-overview-and-comparison.html

As for specific schools, it does depend on what your kid wants to study. I can't recommend schools to you unless I know a little about what your kid wants to do, just as you wouldn't be able to respond to someone who asked you to rec 3-4 good schools with no info on their kid.

It is late here and I'm going to bed, but if you post your kid's stats, I'll try to reply this week.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing during the summer? Time to end that.

Honest question, but why? From a college admission perspective it doesn't look good, but outside of that I see nothing inherently wrong with a teenager just being able to chill for the summer. Why be a camp counselor or library volunteer if their not interested in it.

Because life experiences are how people learn to function in the real world. Existing only in make believe worlds for months on end isn't a good idea.

Isn't a kid in the "real world" enough during the 10 months of the year they are in school and won't they be in the "real world" soon enough anyways? How are they going to be damaged by spending 8 weeks of their 15th summer on the couch?

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just lie on the applications.

How do they know he didn’t play sports outside of school or wasn’t part of some club or take lessons? They don’t.

My kid lied on his as he had zero interest in all that crap (much like yours, just liked video games) and guess what? He’s finishing his sophomore year at UVA as a biochem major. As long as you have the grades and test scores, that rest is fluff and filler that meant nothing 10-15 years ago.

And before someone is all ZOMG you raised a liar! Yep. I’d rather have a liar than a stressed out little robot that I read about on here a lot. Just lie. Simple as that.

I have a kid like that and I don't personally subscribe to this EC, charity work crap. It's not like this town is filled with Mother Theresa's. I know.

Can you give me some examples of what you can "get way with"? Need to start thinking about it.

What the actual f**k. Have some integrity.

F**K off! The whole college admission process reflects everything but integrity. Let's not go down that path. You do you. Let others be.

PP - I'm still waiting for ideas if you don't mind sharing.

Anonymous wrote:OK, he'll get a summer job cooking french fries. But that doesn't make him particularly compelling to any competitive colleges, right?

He shows no drive or enthusiasm for anything besides gaming. We couldn't afford any good summer camps or activities for him that his friends did. We sent him to the cheap county or federally funded stuff in middle school and he hated it and refuses to go to anything that's free or cheap anymore. Honestly they are really poorly run, so I stopped forcing him to go for the experience.

He has this idea he'll get into some competitive/selective colleges because of his grades and test scores, but I'm thinking that's not likely, and especially not likely for merit scholarships. State school is most likely?