Senior cannot decide on schools

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12/15/2016 08:48

Subject: Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

Anonymous

Most schools will have an Accepted Student Day in April after all decisions are out. Plan to re-visit. It is a different experience for the student. Instead of should I apply here or would I be accepted here, now the ball is in the student's court. The front runners become very clear.

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12/15/2016 09:56

Subject: Re:Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

Anonymous

It's hard to be patient but it is their life. And there is a (more usual) timeline for this - and it is April.

Parents you really have no right to be freaking out.

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12/15/2016 10:16

Subject: Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

Anonymous

Some kids need help. Freaking out, not good. Guidance, reassurance, good.

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12/15/2016 17:16

Subject: Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

Anonymous

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So here's the thing. Most, but certainly not all, kids end up loving their college. So in some ways, any choice is the right one.

+1

Delete the term "top school" from your vocabulary. It detracts from the task at hand and just puts unnecessary pressure on her. He school that is right for her is the one she should attend.

And forget ED.

This, plus a million. The only thing worse than "top school" is "top Ivy."

+1

Another phrase to delete from your vocabulary: "dream school." There is no such thing. There are dreams, and any number of schools at which a student can work to make his/her dream(s) reality. But fixating on a particular school as a "dream school" is just counterproductive.

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12/15/2016 17:18

Subject: Re:Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

Anonymous

Here's a good piece on what to think about during this process.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/on-being-a-college-that-unlocks-the-potential-of-students_us_5852eb12e4b0b333cf73ec53

Read Frank Bruni's book as well.

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12/16/2016 00:12

Subject: Senior cannot decide on schools

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Anonymous

We went through this process last year with our twin grandsons. One wound up going out of state and the other stayed nearby as a community college to get the prerequisites out of the way. This is a good article about things to consider. http://family.custhelp.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/26454/kw/college?refcd=377001&nosplash=1&utm_source=forums&utm_medium=referral&utm_campaign=forums2016

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12/16/2016 01:09

Subject: Re:Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

PaleoConPrep
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Joined: 12/30/2015 02:54
Messages: 278
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I can relate to your DD in some ways. I'm currently a high school senior, and I can't really visualize myself at any of the places I'm applying to either. One day I'll have my mind made up about going to Hampden-Sydney, and the very next day I'll change my mind and say I'm going to St. John's. A strategy that's worked for me is asking myself
1. What I like about each college
2. What I dislike about each college
3. What I MUST have in a college
For me, small size, a serious student body, and a classical curriculum are the most important things. A preppy/conservative/Christian student body, and a college that has a prep school feel are added bonuses. All of the colleges I'm applying to offer all or at least some of these things to varying degrees. No college offers everything I want. Hampden-Sydney has that preppy/conservative vibe, but the students aren't serious. St. John's has extremely serious students and a classical curriculum, but it's not all that preppy and there will be plenty of wacky Leftists there. I've got to figure out what really matters to me. My only advice would be to ask your DD what she really wants in a college. Wait to see where she gets in and go from there. My understanding is that ED is only for people who are CERTAIN that the place they're applying ED to is their top choice. If your DD can't decide on schools, I don't see how it makes sense to apply ED anywhere. With all that being said, the schools I'm applying to arnt extremely selective, and I don't have a ton of pressure on me. So I don't think your DD and I are in a similar situation.
Hope this helps and good luck!

profile p.m.

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12/16/2016 02:02

Subject: Senior cannot decide on schools

quote

Anonymous

My DD was accepted at several very selective colleges, but we didn't get FA, so she went to her last choice, the least expensive college. She was not happy about going there, but we told her she didn't have a choice. She went and she loves it and is having a great time. It could not be a more perfect college for her.

My point, OP, is that in the end, going to a "top" school doesn't matter. DD's friend went to a top SLAC and HATED it. She left after a year. It was too competitive for her, even thought she's a super-smart kid. She couldn't stand the constant competition among students. She was used to being in the top tier at her high school, and couldn't tolerate being just "average" at her top school. She's going to a state school now and loves it.

Oh, and we looked into a gap year for DD. She almost took one. Most schools will let you defer admission for a year, so your child won't have to repeat the college application process. DD decided late in the summer that she wanted to go, so we skipped the gap year, which turned out fine. But I know a kid who deferred Harvard for a year, and said it was the best year of her life. She traveled and had some part time jobs, and did volunteer work in another country.