Anonymous wrote:Just say "no gifts, please." Your heart's in the right place, but don't try to tell people how and when to give to charity.

Anonymous wrote:Just say "no gifts, please." Your heart's in the right place, but don't try to tell people how and when to give to charity.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't know OP, I see that your heart is in the right place but I'm not sure I would want to bring a certain amount of money, that you are fully aware of that amount, to a kids birthday party.
I can see this turning into Liam's mom donating $100 because she is really into charitable giving and her sister once lived there or something, and Aidens mom bringing $20, which is what she would spend on a gift since they're close friends of yours, and then Graham's mom is stuck because they don't really know your family but the kids are friends and she was planning to regift a little dollar store thing since they have 3 birthdays this month and Graham wants to go to all of them.
You see where I'm going with this? Don't do it.

But you wouldn't necessarily bring the money to the party, right? You could always bring a card and write in there, "Happy Birthday! In honor of your birthday, Larla made a donation to UNICEF." You wouldn't even need to include the amount.

Anonymous wrote:Because you ignored our previous instructions on how to acknowledge birthdays, we are going to try one more time to get you to celebrate this birthday by spending your money the way we want.

Anonymous wrote:I very rarely give money to charity bc i don't trust where it goes and how many people get a piece during the tinkle down the line, so, No, I wouldn't give you a cent (especially if I didn't know the charity).

Bday parties like this are annoying in general. Very presumptious.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I very rarely give money to charity bc i don't trust where it goes and how many people get a piece during the tinkle down the line, so, No, I wouldn't give you a cent (especially if I didn't know the charity).

Bday parties like this are annoying in general. Very presumptious.

As somebody who works in the non-profit sector, posts like yours make me want to cry. Charities in this country do an enormous amount of good everyday, and very, very few people are getting rich working for them. There are also very easy ways to determine how effective a charity is and to obtain information about how your gifts are used. Bottom line is you just aren't philanthropic, so just own it. [/quote


I give actual items and not money. Diaper drives, food pantry non perishables, dog food to animal shelters, etc.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I very rarely give money to charity bc i don't trust where it goes and how many people get a piece during the tinkle down the line, so, No, I wouldn't give you a cent (especially if I didn't know the charity).

Bday parties like this are annoying in general. Very presumptious.

As somebody who works in the non-profit sector, posts like yours make me want to cry. Charities in this country do an enormous amount of good everyday, and very, very few people are getting rich working for them. There are also very easy ways to determine how effective a charity is and to obtain information about how your gifts are used. Bottom line is you just aren't philanthropic, so just own it. [/quote


I give actual items and not money. Diaper drives, food pantry non perishables, dog food to animal shelters, etc.

Which is all wonderful. But the bottom line is that some of it does have to "tinkle down" to the people who actually run the women's shelter, food pantry, animal shelter, etc. Those places don't run themselves, and the people who work hard to operate them have to live and eat too. So the attitude that people running these essential social service charities are just in it for their cut of the donations is really pretty insulting.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I very rarely give money to charity bc i don't trust where it goes and how many people get a piece during the tinkle down the line, so, No, I wouldn't give you a cent (especially if I didn't know the charity).

Bday parties like this are annoying in general. Very presumptious.

As somebody who works in the non-profit sector, posts like yours make me want to cry. Charities in this country do an enormous amount of good everyday, and very, very few people are getting rich working for them. There are also very easy ways to determine how effective a charity is and to obtain information about how your gifts are used. Bottom line is you just aren't philanthropic, so just own it.

Anonymous wrote:OP, I know you mean well, but this comes across as fairly sanctimonious. When we didn't want gifts at a party, we asked kids to bring a book for a book exchange and every child left with a book (bring a couple of extra in case someone forgets and the kid doesn't want to be left out).

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I very rarely give money to charity bc i don't trust where it goes and how many people get a piece during the tinkle down the line, so, No, I wouldn't give you a cent (especially if I didn't know the charity).

Bday parties like this are annoying in general. Very presumptious.

As somebody who works in the non-profit sector, posts like yours make me want to cry. Charities in this country do an enormous amount of good everyday, and very, very few people are getting rich working for them. There are also very easy ways to determine how effective a charity is and to obtain information about how your gifts are used. Bottom line is you just aren't philanthropic, so just own it. [/quote


I give actual items and not money. Diaper drives, food pantry non perishables, dog food to animal shelters, etc.

Which is all wonderful. But the bottom line is that some of it does have to "tinkle down" to the people who actually run the women's shelter, food pantry, animal shelter, etc. Those places don't run themselves, and the people who work hard to operate them have to live and eat too. So the attitude that people running these essential social service charities are just in it for their cut of the donations is really pretty insulting.

Spoken like a true Red Cross Relief Worker! Wait, where did the funds for Haiti go . J/K sort of. There are just as many shady organizations as there are good ones. My DH works for a large non-profit and they are gold/ 5 star rated, and you can see just how much of your dollar goes to the mission. Still, I don't have to want to contribute to your particular organization, and that doesn't mean I'm against support. And if you only want money, and not the diapers and dog food then shame on you.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I very rarely give money to charity bc i don't trust where it goes and how many people get a piece during the tinkle down the line, so, No, I wouldn't give you a cent (especially if I didn't know the charity).

Bday parties like this are annoying in general. Very presumptious.

As somebody who works in the non-profit sector, posts like yours make me want to cry. Charities in this country do an enormous amount of good everyday, and very, very few people are getting rich working for them. There are also very easy ways to determine how effective a charity is and to obtain information about how your gifts are used. Bottom line is you just aren't philanthropic, so just own it. [/quote


I give actual items and not money. Diaper drives, food pantry non perishables, dog food to animal shelters, etc.

Which is all wonderful. But the bottom line is that some of it does have to "tinkle down" to the people who actually run the women's shelter, food pantry, animal shelter, etc. Those places don't run themselves, and the people who work hard to operate them have to live and eat too. So the attitude that people running these essential social service charities are just in it for their cut of the donations is really pretty insulting.

Spoken like a true Red Cross Relief Worker! Wait, where did the funds for Haiti go . J/K sort of. There are just as many shady organizations as there are good ones. My DH works for a large non-profit and they are gold/ 5 star rated, and you can see just how much of your dollar goes to the mission. Still, I don't have to want to contribute to your particular organization, and that doesn't mean I'm against support. And if you only want money, and not the diapers and dog food then shame on you.

Or March of Dimes or Boys and Girls Club or United Way...even unicef...does my dime see the light of day to get clean water to families in war torn Cameroon or does it fall to the war lords first?