Finding "the one"
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Anonymous
| We think we found "the one"! There is always that feeling of, "but, what if something better comes on the market next week?" Ugh. How did you decided to write on a property and just put that feeling aside?? |
Anonymous
| It's like finding a spouse. Once you've seen the one, you don't like any others that come along. |
Anonymous
Yes, but it is a lot easier changing a so so house to make it "the one". |
Anonymous
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1. If it's good enough for your situation, write an offer.
2. If your offer is accepted stop looking at other houses. |
Anonymous
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I think of it like a parking space. You know how when you go to an area that requires street parking, and you find one that is pretty good, so you take it and you feel pretty good about yourself. Inevitably you end up walking past one on the way to your destination that would have been just a bit better. But only one better space. And your space is still pretty good.
If you've looked at a bunch of houses, you know what's out there. You probably have a pretty good idea of what you want, and whether this meets enough of your wants and needs. Go for it. Yes, chances are, if you keep looking online "Just to see", at least one house will look better to you than your house. But chances are there will be something wrong with it or something that makes it less than THIS house, or someone else will make a better offer. And you have a good house that you like. |
Anonymous
| There's nothing wrong with making the strength of your offer correspond to how much you like the house. Love it and can't bear to lose it = high price, just like it = offer less. You may be less likely to have your offer accepted, but it's amazing how much more perfect a home will seam if you paid a reasonable price. |
Anonymous
| Warning that if you sign a contract you still might have buyer's remorse for a little while after that. And wonder about other houses... But that's totally normal. You will love your house when it's all said and done! |
SAM2
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Here is one interesting blog post that tries to put some math on this question. http://mindyourdecisions.com/blog/2008/01/08/...e-love/#.VOy4MvnF_jI I cannot find it right now, but I recall reading a similar post somewhere about applying this same approach to house hunting.
So for example, after I've shopped online, I have stamina to visit only about 10-15 houses in person before I need to make a decision. So as I understand it, this math suggests I should find 5 possible houses online, and visit all 5 with an open mind, but reject them all no matter how great they seem. Then, I should just keep visiting more houses until I find one that I like *better* than any of the 5 I previously rejected. If I'm understanding that math wrong, please let me know because it's how I make most of my decisions now! |
Anonymous
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1) Stop thinking that there is "the one." It's a romantic mindset that will often lead to heartbreak.
2) Do start realizing that unless one has unlimited means, there are actually quite a few homes that will work given your budget, location, size, and other constraints. 3) If you have been researching the housing market for a while now, you need to feel confident with your choice. 4) Accept that there will always, always be a house that will somehow seem better than the one you end up with--but also realize that there will always, always be a house that is worse than the one you ended up with. 5) Bloom where you are planted. Even if you feel some buyer's remorse, which is common, realize that that is not energy well spent. |
Anonymous
| I'm super picky and we looked at literally hundreds of houses during our nearly 2-year search. I found 5 houses that we would have been very happy with during that time and we got the 5th one which is our home. Losing out to other buyers for those earlier houses was extremely painful but after the 3rd one, I realized that other houses would always come out and, even if ones that I loved did not come out as frequently as I'd have liked, they did come out regularly enough for me to not feel like any one house HAD to be the one. I'm glad we held out and didn't compromise just to make a decision. |
Anonymous
+1. I have never understood this need to constantly wonder if a better house got a way. I mean come on - I never say this but THIS is a First World Problem. Good schools? Within Budget? Commute is acceptable? House isn't something you'd be ashamed to host TG Dinner in? If yes to those then BUY THE FREAKING HOUSE!! 
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Anonymous
| cognitive dissonance or buyer's remorse is natural. What if something better comes along a week after you sign the contract or a week after you move in. You make your choices and make the house your home. The marginal differences in two houses in areas and prices you can afford will not be that significant. And good for you to find a house you like. |
Anonymous
| There will always be a better house. The question is, how long will you keep looking for it? I like the parking space analogy. You can keep looking for "the best" space forever. At some point, though, you really need to get out of your car! |
Anonymous
| I looked at a bunch of houses in South Arlington and North Arlington. The problem I had was that in my price range, the houses in South were so much nicer. But I wasn't as comfortable with the schools. I ended up buying an older place in North Arl due to the schools. I do sometimes think about a few of the amazing houses I saw in South Arl because they were really awesome and would have been great houses for us. But I was just more comfortable with the school pyramid in the house I bought, and for me, that had to take priority. Others might choose differently. (And I chose Arlington over Fairfax because of my commute to DC, forgoing a larger house with more land.) |
Anonymous
Great analogy! |