Forum Index
»
Infants, Toddlers, & Preschoolers
|
Is it me or are many of the boards becoming increasing nasty? Its to the point where the boards and this forum as a whole are becoming less and less usefull and helpful.
So many topics start of fine, but within one or two posts someone has to get on a start a rant about either the OP being an idiot or one of the PP being an idiot. This of course begins the back and forth volley or who is the bigger idiot, finally degenerating into name calling. Its an incredibly useless vicious cycle. I am tempted to try and disect the psychology of those who just want to be nasty and mean, but it pointless and probably pretty obvious why. My point really is how do we make these forums more helpful again. Would thing change if we were all forced to register with screen names? Would accountability make this a forum sane again? |
| I don't think posters can take the poll unless they register but I could be wrong. |
|
Wait, don't we have to be registered to vote in the poll?
But, I think the boards are nasty too. I think it's a necessary evil on anonymous boards and there would be a huge decline in traffic on this board if it was limited to registered users. |
I agree 100% however people can register with any email and any user-name. They really do not need to divulge their actual name or email. Just create a new gmail or yahoo email and use it. The only real identifying factor is the IP address and I am pretty sure Jeff can see that whether we are anonymous or not, and Jeff is the only one who can view that. The downside would be that the user-name would then be tagged to all of our responses so we would know who was posting what, but I guess that is the point! I really feel posting is like reading email though, you have no idea what tone is meant to be conveyed and you have no idea how other people read/perceive things. Posting with a name may not change that at all. |
| I'm all for it! |
Mrbobby, This is what I said - The only real identifying factor is the IP address and I am pretty sure Jeff can see that whether we are anonymous or not, and Jeff is the only one who can view that. I said the only identifying factor is the IP address. I did not say he knows exactly who we are. |
| Totally agree. It is much nastier these days. On the plus side, I went on to the Urban Baby Board - the one for NYC as I wanted to know about something related to NYC - and was absolutely floored by the level of bitchiness there. We look like amateurs in comparison! What is it about women + kids + Internet = nastiness??? |
|
YES YES YES. There is a better way but Jeff Steele doesn't want it, and said he doesn't want to do the work to enforce it. I think the discussion boards on www.mothering.com are very well managed and much better overall. They are still anonymous (people register with a unique username, such as MomofBoys or MarathonMom, and each forum is monitored by a volunteer monitor (not one person, like Jeff) who enforces the guidelines when necessary. The rules are basically no nastiness, no attacking, no defamation. I quizzed Jeff about this over a year ago and he said that he believes that nastiness is a freedom of speech so he doesn't mind it. The lack of guidelines is implicit support of the nastiness. So it's a no-rules culture on DCUMs, which greatly limits its potential.
Here are the rules on http://www.mothering.com/mdc/mdc_useragreement.html 1. Do not post in a disrespectful, defamatory, adversarial, baiting, harassing, offensive, insultingly sarcastic or otherwise improper manner, toward a member or other individual, including casting of suspicion upon a person, invasion of privacy, humiliation, demeaning criticism, name-calling, personal attack, or in any way which violates the law. 2. Do not post profane or sexually explicit text. Discussions of a sexual nature should be within the realm of topics inherent to Mothering discussions such as sex after delivery, sex and the family bed, etc. 3. Do not post copyrighted material without permission. See copyright guidelines. 4. Do not post to advertise your product or business. Acceptable advertising is available on the boards. Information may be obtained by contacting advertising@mothering.com for banner ads. Advertising in signatures and in discussion board threads is strictly prohibited with the exception of those members who have paid the fee for the Signature Advertising Package. MDC sales and fundraising information may be posted by administrators, moderators, and designated members. Members may not use their business or product names as a username. 5. Do not use a Private Message (PM) or email to deliver advertisements or business/product information and offers to our members without first having been asked for such information by them. This would be regarded as spam and may result in suspension or being banned. 6. Do not post to invite MDC members to other boards for adversarial purposes or post inflammatory information about MDC discussions at other boards, or about communities and discussions elsewhere, regardless of whether or not you link to that discussion or community. This is to maintain and respect the integrity of our own and other communities. 7. Do not post to debate or challenge the MDC User Agreement, the moderators, administrators, or their actions. Constructive criticism and questions for purposes of clarification are best addressed directly to the moderator or administrator by private message or personal e-mail. If this is not successful, see Recourse. 8. Do not start a thread to discuss member behavior or statements of members made in other threads or to criticize another discussion on the boards. Do not post to a thread to take direct issue with a member. If you feel a member has posted or behaved inappropriately in a discussion, communicate directly with the member, moderator or administrator privately and refrain from potentially defaming discussion in a thread. 9. Follow the rules and guidelines specific to individual forums. These will be posted at the top of the forum. 10. Posts are an integral part of the discussion threads of mothering.com and you may not delete your posts. Though you are free to edit your posts, we do not allow members to delete large numbers of their posts. 11. Mothering reserves the right to change this User Agreement as necessary to meet any future needs that may arise. It is our customary procedure to submit revised rules and guidelines to the membership for a 30-day comment period prior to adoption. 12. Given these guidelines, we encourage friendly debate, socializing, and good humor. Thank you for becoming part of our online community. |
The message I as responding to was edited by the poster so of course this makes no sense now. |
| You have to remember that since everyone is anonymous, people will say things on here they would never say to your face. Most of the threads (with the exception of the Special Needs subtopic) are good reading for entertainment and nothing more. |
|
I edited my post because it sounded too snarky. I didn't know anyone saw the original post.
Sorry. |
|
This comes up every so often. There is no way it will ever happen. This website has such heavy traffic because of the anonymity. Jeff did try a board where you had to be logged in to post and had to delete it because no one used it. I think everyone here that wants to use a login, should do that.
Also, I've spent a lot of time on the mothering boards and agree there isn't nastiness, but you're only allowed to post things in agreement with everyone else. Everything else is deleted. |
Now I feel bad! Sorry Mr. Booby.
|
|
I really like the anonymity, and don't mind dealing with the occasional nastiness. I think can you learn to roll with it. Personally if one or two people posty something nasty on n otherwise positive thread, it doesn't detract from the overall usefulness of the thread. If I want sunshine and puppies, I can head over to the "mothering" boards.
|
I don't agree, and I don't think that Jeff's prior set up of a sub-board for registered users only was a valid test. Why would anyone have wanted to use a user name on a sub-board when posting anonymously to the original board was still an option? Of course it got no traffic. I suspect that if the entire DCUM forum section was adjusted to require a user name, there would be very little (if any) drop off in traffic. In fact, there might even be an increase in traffic since people would not be driven away by the overwhelming nastiness. This might be the only truly anonymous message board I even participate in. Another message board I participate in (on a wholly different topic, but one that nevertheless generates a lot of disagreement) requires a registered user name for everyone, and there currently are 58,700 registered users there -- no lack of comments and no lack of disagreement, but you quickly learn to spot the trolls. All this talk is just talk though, since only Jeff's "vote" counts. |