What do the teenage years look like for a DD with ADHD?
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Anonymous
Wow. IMO, this pediatrician is not a keeper. What is he/she waiting for? A serious accident? Bad grades? Does he/she think that the kid will grow out of it? This is for a kid who the teacher flagged as inattentive at age 5. This child has gone 10 years without investigating medication or accommodations support? What do you think that has done to the kid? The teen years are infinitely harder than the younger years. The responsibilities are vastly increased. The expectations are also increased. The consequences are tougher, and can affect their life choices and sense of self-concept. Kids with ADHD are more susceptible, for a variety of reasons to substance abuse, and the teen years are rife with opportunities for substance use, no matter how good a parent you are. Also, the hormones kick in on top of the rejection sensitivity inherent in ADHD. And, friends and teachers are often less willing to put up with ADHD behaviors, and ADHD communication styles have a bigger negative impact socially. I'm an adult with ADHD that was not diagnosed until adulthood (when one of my kids was also diagnosed with ADHD). My life would have been vastly different - in a better way - had I had medication, therapy and some accommodations, even though I was quite successful in some areas without that. |
Anonymous
One of mine was, the other slept through every alarm, and it was frustrating. But we could talk about it, which made things easier than dealing with a dysregulated young kid. |
Anonymous
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DD is a junior in HS - diagnosed in preschool with ADHD combined type. Each phase has its own challenges - if there's one thing I have learned it's that early intervention is really important. You don't need your pediatrician's permission to get your child tested if you suspect something.
Pay attention to where your child struggles/breaks down - make a list of the hard things and seek out strategies to help address them. Additudemag.com is a great resource. To answer your question, my 17 year old with ADHD is driving, she independently does her homework and is up and out the door for school with no problems. She got her first job this summer. It is possible! But it takes a lot of building skills to get there... it's definitely been a journey. I have found that working with an executive function/ADHD coach is really helpful esp in the teen years. We're still working on many important areas like regulating emotions (hard for any teen) and personal organization. Hang in there and make sure to celebrate the small wins. |
SunnyDays
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| We were also worried about what that looked like with our son. Those years can be daunting. We’ve use an ADHD coach and she too always says to celebrate the small wins! Coaching is a piece of it but not the only piece ofc. Patience is key too. And self care! Helps with the patience. lol We were desperate to find a “coach” (not just any “coach”) and see what it was like. Fortunately someone referred us to one and she’s been amazing. I referred her to someone else too and they said it’s made a big difference for them. Everyone is different of course. I’m happy to pass her information along to you. You can private message me - I think that’s how they prefer on here when it comes to personal information. Good luck and stay strong! |
Anonymous
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I have a 10 year old boy with severe adhd. Getting ready in the morning and evening are still really painful. His brain cannot follow a thought or action at those times of days. I was just this week lamenting to a friend that I'm not sure he will ever be able to manage his own schedule! But of course he will... eventually and likely with painful mistakes before he figures out what works for him. At age 6, you just keep scaffolding and try to do so without judgment or exasperation.
Learn all you can about adhd. Your child can only do so much right now, but you as the adult with perspective can gain valuable insights that will help her and you. Every year with my son has gotten better. Easier to manage, easier to understand, and he is maturing. I am looking forward to the teen years because I know we are laying ground work now for future success. |
Anonymous
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MY DD is now a senior in high school — it’s hard to believe how far she’s come. She was diagnosed with ADHD (combined type) back in 2nd grade. We had a feeling even earlier, but waited a few years before getting her tested.
Back then, we got so many notes home that we knew she needed extra support (and medication). Parenting is never easy, but parenting a child with ADHD — especially a daughter — comes with its own set of challenges. Every year she averages about 8 referrals, her grades are decent, and she’s planning to start out at community college. She’s already overslept a few times this school year (and yes, she’s earned a few detentions for it . But despite all that, she keeps pushing forward — and I couldn’t be prouder of her resilience and growth. She was even suspended a few times. only for a day, but stil.. |