At what age should you stop bringing your opposite gender child to the locker room?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

It’s a public locker room- people will see her changing. It’s not your own personal locker room.

[Anonymous]

My 6.5 year old boy just asked for privacy from me in our stall in the family locker room this weekend. I stood just outside while he got changed.

Pretty sure he would not be comfortable changing in front of the girls from his class. I think it’s developmentally appropriate for kids aged 5+ to begin wanting privacy.

Also, despite the PP’s protests, my son does like looking at boobs and I would never let him make some poor young girl uncomfortable. If we had to change in the car, we’d do that or just head home and shower there.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Pedophiles are a problem, people.
Please keep that in mind.

You know what's not a big problem? Getting in the car and going home and showering there. Oh, big whoop, your hair will smell like chlorine for 15 minutes. Better than pedophiles AND making an entire locker room super uncomfortable.

Most of the time that is fine but in the middle of the winter when its freezing out, you need to at least change.

You don't, actually. That's what parkas are for.

-Captain of the high school swim team who was in winter swimming for 12 years. In Indiana.

+2. Winter swimming for years in PA. My hair actually did freeze one time when I didn't wear a hat, but it thawed once I jumped in the car!

And these are part of wonderful swimming memories, and living in a time when parents didn't micromanage and sweat every single little thing.

You mean uninvolved parents... we still have those now.

And, you are no longer the team captain.

PA PP here. I don't think it's a question of involved or uninvolved. Just different expectations. I don't know if people didn't worry about appearance as much or what, but it was not a big deal to drive 10 minutes home in a wet suit and shower and change there. In summer we'd sit on a towel so we didn't get the car seat wet. In winter we'd throw on sweat pants and a jacket over the suit and change at home -- again, only a 10-15 minute drive. Not a big deal. I never caught cold or any of the other dire predictions. And I sure as heck wasn't about to shower in the open showers my school gym had. Not to mention that by the time swim practice ended at 5:45 I was starving and still had to get picked up by mom. No snacks in the car! The fastest way to eat was to go home in the suit and change quickly while mom cooked dinner.

Maybe that is what you did, but it is absurd to to think the majority of people leave a pool in a wet suit and put dry clothes over it. But I also think the amount of paranoia around here that their elementary aged or older child is going to get molested in a busy public locker room is absurd too.

Its not absurd as its happened in locker rooms and locker rooms, especially in county/city pools are open for anyone to use. Wet suit spring, fall, summer is fine. Winter no. That poster is lucky they have never had a car stall out or other emergency. No snacks in the care is a different issue.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:What about for dads with their daughters? Dads, at what age do you become uncomfortable with them in the locker room, and feel like they're leering at you?

If I bring my 4 year old daughter into the locker room because I don’t want to leave her alone I cover up just the way I’d do at home. If other guys are there I just tell them she is with me and they are always very dad like. There are man laws that are never broken.

Dad's don't care at all. My husband says girls are in there all the time. He would prefer them in there then going alone.

I see nothing wrong with girls going in with their dads, but it’s not like there are tons of pedos in the women’s locker room. If your daughter can dress/undress herself she should be perfectly fine there.

The kids run wild. Out kids get screamed at constantly at the coaches for goofing off, bullying and other stuff. Why is it that hard to take care of you kids? I'm amazed at people who just drop off their 5-6-7-8 year olds with no cell phone or way to contact them and pick them up a few hours later. Kids just sit there waiting and some get worried after a while.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Last night at the pool locker room, a little girl aged somewhere between 6-8ish starters asking her mom a bunch of questions about why my DS age 4.5 was in the women’s locker room. Today, a mom of a different, similar aged child said “let’s change your clothes in the car, I’m not having you change in front of boys. I told her my son was 4 and wouldn’t care, and she said she wasn’t talking about us-there was an older boy in another area, which there was. A parent had brought in her three year old boy as well as her older brother he goes to school with my child so I know his age) who I would guess is 6-7. What’s the cutoff for this sort of thing?

Gender is a social construct.

Everyone should just go wherever they please.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

And, what if you had a boy? You can change discretely. You should not be running around naked anywhere. Kids safety is more important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pedophiles are a problem, people.
Please keep that in mind.

You know what's not a big problem? Getting in the car and going home and showering there. Oh, big whoop, your hair will smell like chlorine for 15 minutes. Better than pedophiles AND making an entire locker room super uncomfortable.

Most of the time that is fine but in the middle of the winter when its freezing out, you need to at least change.

You don't, actually. That's what parkas are for.

-Captain of the high school swim team who was in winter swimming for 12 years. In Indiana.

+2. Winter swimming for years in PA. My hair actually did freeze one time when I didn't wear a hat, but it thawed once I jumped in the car!

And these are part of wonderful swimming memories, and living in a time when parents didn't micromanage and sweat every single little thing.

Ah... uninvolved selfish parents who didn't care about anything but themselves. Times haven't changed that much. And, we aren't in Indiana.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

It’s a public locker room- people will see her changing. It’s not your own personal locker room.

NP here. Yes, it's a public locker room and people will see you changing, but for my 11 year old daughter, it's hard enough for her to change around other women/girls. She would be mortified if a boy saw her. I get it- I have a 9 year old son as well, and it's not always easy logistically.

[Anonymous]

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Parents are wise NOT to send their young children alone
into a public locker room.

Exactly, but in each of these threads, you'll notice that it's the mothers of girls (who have no boys) who do not hesitate in pushing young boys out to the tender mercies of the men's locker room.

I've spent many years on DCUM. It never changes. It's amazing how ignorant these idiots are about basic biology. Young children don't have sexual thoughts about naked bodies.

I have a boy and a girl. My 7 year old boy has shown interest in girls’ bodies. Not full on sexually obviously but he’s definitely shown interest in my Victoria Secret catalogue and would probably stare at some real life boobs. Our pediatrician said that type of curiosity is absolutely normal.

+1. Clearly, the difference is that moms of girls aren't freaked out and threatened by their daughters' curiosity and future sexuality, and moms of boys can't handle it and pretend like it's not happening.

If you think an 8-year-old boy isn't going to stare at boobs, butts and vaginas, you are a complete moron, or willfully delusional.

Harsh words here. A little misplaced since the vagina is an internal organ. No one is looking at those without a speculum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

Right to privacy VS safety, right to privacy VS safety... Yes, safety trumps privacy every time. Sorry, lady.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

Right to privacy VS safety, right to privacy VS safety... Yes, safety trumps privacy every time. Sorry, lady.

So her daughter doesn’t deserve to feel safe?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

Right to privacy VS safety, right to privacy VS safety... Yes, safety trumps privacy every time. Sorry, lady.

OP of that comment. It’s not a requirement for your son to go in to a locker room and change!! If your son is at an inappropriate age to be in the opposite gender locker room then you don’t get to bring him in. Complain to your gym and get family locker rooms

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your overprotectiveness if your sons does NOT trump my pubescent daughter’s right to privacy. IDGAF if your kid sees me naked, that’s what happens when you go into a women’s locker room. However my daughter would be very developmentally appropriate horrified and that’s no okay.

And, what if you had a boy? You can change discretely. You should not be running around naked anywhere. Kids safety is more important.

I am most certainly not running around naked anywhere. I am drying off my body as is my pubescent daughter. If your son is at an age where it is inappropriate for them to be in the opposite gender dressing room then you need to complain to your gym and ask for family changing rooms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 6.5 year old boy just asked for privacy from me in our stall in the family locker room this weekend. I stood just outside while he got changed.

Pretty sure he would not be comfortable changing in front of the girls from his class. I think it’s developmentally appropriate for kids aged 5+ to begin wanting privacy.

Also, despite the PP’s protests, my son does like looking at boobs and I would never let him make some poor young girl uncomfortable. If we had to change in the car, we’d do that or just head home and shower there.

Thank you for being a reasonable parent who cares about more than just her own/her family's comfort level and convenience. I sincerely appreciate reasonable, thoughtful parents like you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pedophiles are a problem, people.
Please keep that in mind.

You know what's not a big problem? Getting in the car and going home and showering there. Oh, big whoop, your hair will smell like chlorine for 15 minutes. Better than pedophiles AND making an entire locker room super uncomfortable.

Most of the time that is fine but in the middle of the winter when its freezing out, you need to at least change.

You don't, actually. That's what parkas are for.

-Captain of the high school swim team who was in winter swimming for 12 years. In Indiana.

Never seen any of the team kids wearing their parkas here after meets and its still absurd to go out with a wet suit.

It's actually not.