Is your kid enjoying college?

[Anonymous]

My DC is at Michigan and it's been a wonderful experience. The campus is gorgeous, it's been easy to meet friends in their dorm and classes and they dove into a sport they love. It's a big school, but it doesn't feel that way unless you are at a football game and that's super fun anyway. :p. There is always something going on and Ann Arbor strikes a good balance of city & small town. I was worried DC might be overwhelmed or that homesickness might be a lot, but the only hiccup was related to a relationship that should have ended before college. Once that was out of the way, it's been pretty great.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Could folks simply post schools where their freshman seemed to find their way more quickly? I appreciate that many kids find their place later on, but interested in schools that really lean into the freshman experience to get kids involved early on. Just names, no need for more description so as to stay anonymous!

I have twins at W&M who have different dorms / friend groups / majors. Both are really, really enjoying their experience. Older sibling is a senior at Berkeley, and the experience has been "okay", but nothing like W&M.

My kid didn't wind up going to W&M (we're out of state), but I loved the school. It's a special place.

[Anonymous]

My freshman is enjoying college and learned from an older sibling that a big key is to get involved.

Intramural sports, clubs, charitable activities, campus job, etc.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Pp here of a happy sophomore. DS is at a school where Greek life is big, but he thinks the whole process is stupid and so he’s never been interested. A lot of of his friends who have considered rushing either got fed up with it or just kind of put up with it and got through it just to experience Greek life.

That said, he still has lots of friends, goes to football games, play poker a lot, and works out a ton. Also plays a club sport.

I don’t think you have to have a Greek experience at a heavy Greek school, but you will have to get involved in other ways.

I also think freshman year is always the worst.

I went to UVA, and even though I looked back on my experience fondly enough now, it wasn’t really a great fit for me and I really struggled freshman year. It took until sophomore year until I met more good friends, and then by senior year, I had found a groove and I’m still close with a lot of those folks.

How does he do with the ladies on campus?

Just to let you know as someone with kids in a sorority, being in a frat isn't some flex that you think it is. A lot of girls don't want frat bros. Also, there is data that participation in Greek life as a whole is on the decline.

Yeah. What I'm hearing from my DD is that being a frat bro is more likely to be considered a red flag than not.

The data doesn't lie, and most schools publish it. Fraternity men have higher GPAs, higher graduation rates, higher starting salaries, and better dating opportunities than GDIs.

Exactly what a frat bro would say.

Provide links to data please.

Just Google the name of any school plus "greek report card," geed.

Since you can't seem to figure that out on your own, here's one for Auburn:

https://studentaffairs.auburn.edu/greek/accountability/spring-2025-greek-life-grade-report.pdf

All Greek average: 3.46
All undergrad average: 3.35

[Anonymous]

DC is a sophomore at a nescac and is so happy. Living with nice friends, enjoying lots of outdoor activities, has a job, just picked an advisor and planning abroad semester for next year, dating, studying hard, and goes to a couple parties on the weekends. It’s so much better than the final slog of high school

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DC is a sophomore at a nescac and is so happy. Living with nice friends, enjoying lots of outdoor activities, has a job, just picked an advisor and planning abroad semester for next year, dating, studying hard, and goes to a couple parties on the weekends. It’s so much better than the final slog of high school

What school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Mixed bag. Academics are great-- breezing through classes thanks to IB in HS. But socially it could be better.

IB really does prepare them. My DD said everyone looks at her funny when she says her workload has been way easier than high school. Taking 18 credits, and still feels like she’s more on top of things and has more of a social life.

But she’s also not a partier, more of a low-key socializer, so she doesn’t feel the need to be out drinking every night. (As far as we know, anyway! Guess the grades will tell the real story.)

My kid was in an IB magnet, now a dual STEM major in college where they have straight As. DC is a senior, and yes, parties but on the weekends only. They care a lot about their grades. Always has.

DC said last semester and this semester they actually have to study. LOL. Their younger sibling who is not in the IB magnet gave them the side eye and a disgusted look.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DC is a sophomore at a nescac and is so happy. Living with nice friends, enjoying lots of outdoor activities, has a job, just picked an advisor and planning abroad semester for next year, dating, studying hard, and goes to a couple parties on the weekends. It’s so much better than the final slog of high school

What school?

I’m too nervous to say because younger sib is applying ED after visiting and seeing all the fun, stressful couple months for the high schooler in the middle of apps, hope it works out

[Anonymous]

My college sophomore (WASP SLAC) is so happy I am actually worried for when she actually has to graduate. Her classes are hard so she does get stressed re academics, but she is also really busy with clubs, friends, events, etc etc. I used to tell her to not get caught up in the whole "college is the best four years of your life" thing because I really feel it gives kids unrealistic expectations, but in her case she does actually feel like she is just so lucky that this is her life.

[Anonymous]

My freshman DD texted a couple of weeks ago and said she was finally homesick for the first time.

Everything sucked, she missed her cats, she got out of class late and the sushi place was already closed, and the live band playing on the lawn outside her dorm was too loud.

By the time she had a chance to call us, she’d been by the cafeteria for dinner and was feeling much better. She’d even made plans to watch a movie with friends later.

Turned out she wasn’t homesick, just hangry.

[Anonymous]

My DD is a freshman and very happy at a HYP.

[Anonymous]

My DS is a junior and is having an up and down experience. He's at a mid sized school (about 8000 undergrads) so it's small enough that you constantly run into people you know on campus.

Academically, the first semester freshman year was a little bumpy (he got a D in one class.). But he figured out to study and which classes to take and he's been doing great since then.

Socially, he quickly found a group of friends. He was loving the social aspect of college. Then at the end of sophomore year, he had an ugly falling out with his roommate over a girl. He decided to change his housing for this year, so he's now living in a single in an apartment with three other guy - all four of them were strangers to each other. His social life has taken a major hit. He has joined a couple of new clubs, and he talks about grabbing meals with his classmates after class or study sessions. He loves playing sports and has done a couple of intramurals with one of his new clubs. But he still spends almost every Friday and Saturday night by himself. It's hard to break into a new friend group junior year.

[Anonymous]

DS is loving Davidson. Great friends, tons of activities and very challenging courses. He even likes his roommate. My only complaint is that he’s so busy that he rarely has time for a quick phone call.

[Anonymous]

My quirky kid is living his absolute best life at Rose-Hulman. The first night he was on campus he texted and said, "These are my people." This was a kid who spent much of high school playing video games in his room, but he is out socializing, rushing a frat, and making tons of friends. The workload is pretty brutal, but he's working hard and get a lot of support from his faculty. (Case in point, he reached out to a comp sci professor at midnight one night and she had emailed him back by 12:03 am.) It's definitely a great school for a certain type of kid. Love seeing him thrive there!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My quirky kid is living his absolute best life at Rose-Hulman. The first night he was on campus he texted and said, "These are my people." This was a kid who spent much of high school playing video games in his room, but he is out socializing, rushing a frat, and making tons of friends. The workload is pretty brutal, but he's working hard and get a lot of support from his faculty. (Case in point, he reached out to a comp sci professor at midnight one night and she had emailed him back by 12:03 am.) It's definitely a great school for a certain type of kid. Love seeing him thrive there!

This is awesome!!

The longer I spend in the college application/student phase of parenting (on kid #3 now), the more I realize that FIT is truly everything and that most college study bodies have exceedingly unique personalities.
Sure, there is some overlap and there are kids who will thrive in many settings but even the large state schools are a better fit for some kids than others.