Sent home from summer camp

[Anonymous]

Remove the first sentence about your daughter being amazing (it's off-putting and amazingness doesn't matter). Replace it with a statement of intent. I am contacting you to express our disagreement with your decision about our child and to ask for a refund.

Although the details you provided are important, you don't mention the cost until the end at which point they may have stopped reading having gotten the gist.

Always be straight and direct!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The kid wasn’t “medically cleared” if the clearance came with caveats. Such as frequent check ins. You mentioned that was “one” of the suggestions. What were the others? They may seem reasonable to you but unreasonable to the camp. The nurse isn’t a psychologist. She is mainly there to put band aids on, check temperatures, administer prescribed medication, etc. Your kid has needs beyond her expertise.

Again, they didn’t even read it. They did not know about any caveats. The check-in suggestion was the only one that pertained to camp. They made the assumption that she needed one-on-one staff which wasn’t true. They would have known this if they had taken 5 minutes to read the paperwork which took several hours for us to get completed. It is a matter of not following through with their own protocol. Why ask for something this time consuming when you aren’t willing to take 5 minutes to read it?

But they said they didn’t have “one to one” supervision for her. That’s the hold up. It even says in your medical report that she needs checkins. They decided they don’t have someone available to do that frequently. Sounds like they understood and made a decision about her camp future. You just don’t agree since it’s not in your favor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It wasn’t cutting. She was scratching herself with her other arm. It was very superficial, hardly noticeable. Cat scratches look much worse.

This is absurd OP the camp is corrrect here.

You are the problem.

It’s camp it’s not school big difference this is not a hill to die on.
Nor is it productive for your child.

You are not admitting your child needs more help .

Why are you disbelieving the OP? I can totally believe the scenario laid out here.

Not PP but OP is completely downplaying the situation. Being cleared with the recommendation of frequent check ins isn’t being cleared. It’s being cleared with accommodations that the camp was not prepared to handle - and that’s no surprise after a self harm incident.

I went through this with school, which is staffed with mostly professionals who are long out of HS and have a lot of life experience. When my child self harmed, medical clearance was required. When the medical clearance was with caveats, my child was not readmitted. A new placement was found. Camp is staffed with HS kids. They are not competent to handle this sort of evaluation and handling a situation where a check in results in a thumbs down.

But here it seems there was no self-harm at all. Many kids with autism have physical tics. My son pinches his skin a lot. I can believe OP when she explains that the scratches were not self-harm, but tics.

If it was nothing, there would not have been a recommendation for frequent check ins. Self harm or not, this was not a medical clearance. No camp is going to ignore a recommendation where they believe they witnesses self harm.

Scratching and skin picking are common stims. I would believe OP over a 20-something camp counselor.

Yes. I do this, and it's OCD-related. Never crossed my mind someone might think I'm self-harming!

Of course they are self-harm. People with skin picking can end up with infections and other skin conditions. When someone’s anxiety leads them to self soothe in ways that harm their body, that’s textbook self harm.

What do people who are saying they this isn’t self harm think self harm is?

I broke my nose playing soccer. Is soccer self-harm?

Did you break your nose by hitting yourself in the face? Or did the ball or someone else’s body do that?

[Anonymous]

When a kid is cleared to return to something they don’t have a report that takes 5 minutes to read. They get a one line note that says “cleared to return”. I don’t think OP got clearance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When a kid is cleared to return to something they don’t have a report that takes 5 minutes to read. They get a one line note that says “cleared to return”. I don’t think OP got clearance.

Right. OP tried to give them something that said “cleared” as long as several suggestions from the counselor were implemented. That’s not what the camp was looking for.

[Anonymous]

Many camps want the clearance to be faxed from a Dr.’s office or a release of info signed because they have concerns that parents are withholding information.

OP isn’t being clear on what her daughter answered that led the camp to call EMT’s and call parents to take her home. If it had merely been barely visible scratches and nothing alarming was said there is no way a camp is going to call 911 for EMT’s to come. Clearly OP’s daughter said something concerning.

After OP was sent home and the director spoke to the parents to say they need clearance most likely the camp director investigated and more concerns were found.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think your letter is way too long. You need to decide if it’s a letter to get a refund or a letter to express your frustrations. Right now it’s trying to do both, and not doing either very well.

For a refund, the focus is that you were told she could return with a medical clearance. You got a medical clearance, but we’re still not able to return. The camp is a financial challenge for you, and you respectfully request a refund of the cost of the missed time. If there’s any refund policy you can cite to support your request, add it.

Once the refund is issued, then write a letter expressing your concerns and frustrations about how your daughter was treated.

+100
Do exactly as this poster instructs.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like there was miscommunication on both sides. Is it possible to obtain camp records? Schools are obligated to honor requests for records. Camp records might be the only way to figure out what really happened.

[Anonymous]

If anything, you may get a credit, but I doubt they will be giving you money back, especially if your daughter received some aid to attend.

My daughter missed 3 days of a week long camp due to illness - as in she needed emergency surgery. The camp gave me a credit towards the next year. I don’t think they had to do it, but I asked nicely. Your email comes off as if the camp is 100% in the wrong and I just don’t agree when the camp is responsible for ALL of the campers. It is not fair to the counselors or other campers to have an attendee commit acts that are viewed as harmful and make statements about wellbeing. And yes, in this case, it is the camps feelings about these things that matter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When a kid is cleared to return to something they don’t have a report that takes 5 minutes to read. They get a one line note that says “cleared to return”. I don’t think OP got clearance.

Right. OP tried to give them something that said “cleared” as long as several suggestions from the counselor were implemented. That’s not what the camp was looking for.

Except she said the camp didn't even look at the doctor's note at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many camps want the clearance to be faxed from a Dr.’s office or a release of info signed because they have concerns that parents are withholding information.

OP isn’t being clear on what her daughter answered that led the camp to call EMT’s and call parents to take her home. If it had merely been barely visible scratches and nothing alarming was said there is no way a camp is going to call 911 for EMT’s to come. Clearly OP’s daughter said something concerning.

After OP was sent home and the director spoke to the parents to say they need clearance most likely the camp director investigated and more concerns were found.

This. None of OP's facts matter. The camp wouldn't have called EMS unless they thought it went above and beyond normal camp medical issues. That means they were concerned.

Perhaps at the pick up time, the camp legitimately thought that OP's daughter could come back with clearance. And then a day went by and the camp administration talked to the counselors and presumably learned more of what went down, and on further reflection, they didn't think they wanted the OP's daughter to come back. They didn't have to read the clearance report (whether it was one sentence or 5 pages); they'd decided they couldn't support the OP's daughter.

Maybe it was something as simple as, they got around to talking to other kids in the cabin, and a bunch of them expressed real fear about the incident. That's a good enough reason to not have the OP's daughter back, even if a doctor medically cleared her to say she wasn't at risk of further harm to herself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When a kid is cleared to return to something they don’t have a report that takes 5 minutes to read. They get a one line note that says “cleared to return”. I don’t think OP got clearance.

Right. OP tried to give them something that said “cleared” as long as several suggestions from the counselor were implemented. That’s not what the camp was looking for.

Except she said the camp didn't even look at the doctor's note at all.

Doesn't matter. They don't owe the OP this. They decided they couldn't support the daughter, even if she was "cleared".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When a kid is cleared to return to something they don’t have a report that takes 5 minutes to read. They get a one line note that says “cleared to return”. I don’t think OP got clearance.

Right. OP tried to give them something that said “cleared” as long as several suggestions from the counselor were implemented. That’s not what the camp was looking for.

Except she said the camp didn't even look at the doctor's note at all.

But then how would they know she needed 1:1 care due to frequent checkins? OPs omitting certain details to bolster her case here as if if anyone here has the power to change her situaiton.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When a kid is cleared to return to something they don’t have a report that takes 5 minutes to read. They get a one line note that says “cleared to return”. I don’t think OP got clearance.

Right. OP tried to give them something that said “cleared” as long as several suggestions from the counselor were implemented. That’s not what the camp was looking for.

Except she said the camp didn't even look at the doctor's note at all.

But then how would they know she needed 1:1 care due to frequent checkins? OPs omitting certain details to bolster her case here as if if anyone here has the power to change her situaiton.

Their camp staff decided she needed 1:1 care without waiting to know the results of her medical and counseling appts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Many camps want the clearance to be faxed from a Dr.’s office or a release of info signed because they have concerns that parents are withholding information.

OP isn’t being clear on what her daughter answered that led the camp to call EMT’s and call parents to take her home. If it had merely been barely visible scratches and nothing alarming was said there is no way a camp is going to call 911 for EMT’s to come. Clearly OP’s daughter said something concerning.

After OP was sent home and the director spoke to the parents to say they need clearance most likely the camp director investigated and more concerns were found.

This. None of OP's facts matter. The camp wouldn't have called EMS unless they thought it went above and beyond normal camp medical issues. That means they were concerned.

Perhaps at the pick up time, the camp legitimately thought that OP's daughter could come back with clearance. And then a day went by and the camp administration talked to the counselors and presumably learned more of what went down, and on further reflection, they didn't think they wanted the OP's daughter to come back. They didn't have to read the clearance report (whether it was one sentence or 5 pages); they'd decided they couldn't support the OP's daughter.

Maybe it was something as simple as, they got around to talking to other kids in the cabin, and a bunch of them expressed real fear about the incident. That's a good enough reason to not have the OP's daughter back, even if a doctor medically cleared her to say she wasn't at risk of further harm to herself.

+1