Birth rate plummets

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was an only child and there wasn't really enough money for just a 1 kid family.

I was sick of doing without and so after college I focused on travel. NO WAY was I going to be trapped with kids in my 20s.

I had 1 kid at 40. In many ways I felt my life ended then.

Others find life much richer with raising a family. different strokes for different folks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids and cost of living are too expensive if you have a job in a top 15 metro area. About 100m Americans live in the top 15 metro areas, or about 30% of the country.

At current interest rates, a 31 year-old Millennial couple (peak baby birthing time) need a household income of $250K to buy a decent home an acceptable school district, two cars, daycare, student loan payment, retirement contribution, plus weekly expenses (food, diapers, medical costs, utilities, etc.) AND not feel completely on edge of losing it.

At a $250K HHI, you're already at the 92nd percentile of American households. But 30% of Americans live in a top 15 metro area and are dealing with a huge run up in RE prices and now interest rates.

How is a 31 year-old Millennial couple supposed to buy their first home and have a baby? It's literally not possible unless they are pulling in $250K or have family $$$$.

The math doesn't math. I'd skip kids too. We got lucky in that we are elder Millennials who bought in 2017.

We make $500K today and there's no way we could afford our current house at the current prices and interest rate without a lot of pain and skimpy budgets by the end of the month.

Meh, I think the anxiety of this upcoming generation is really strong and leads to the idea that they need everything in its place. It's just not reasonable. Probably access to too much information has led to this.

You don't need to own a home at 31. Used cars work great. I think people' priorities are a bit focused on things rather than family. And thats ok; it's just different.

But you can raise kids just fine on 100-150k starting out while you work towards making that 250k HHI.

Sorry, but you SHOULD have settled housing when you start a family. That means housing you will be able to afford for the next 5-7 years while you are in the toughest early years for child rearing. Moving homes or living at the whim of a landlord is incredibly difficult when you have young kids. I know people do it....but it's not how most Americans envision starting a family.

People who actively plan for children want a stable home and job situation. The current economic environment is way too unstable, hence why you see the drop in fertility.

Older Americans have no one to blame but themselves for this predicament. They have been in power and setting economic policies for the last 3-4 decades. This is not a country that values the things that matter to families - affordable safe housing, decent public schools, affordable childcare, and a robust healthcare safety net.

The message projected to young Americans is "why should we pay for your kid?".....then don't expect them to have kids. The social contract in the U.S. is broken.

Nah. People can and do rent and raise kids everywhere, and all the time. Public schools aren't a concern for a few years while you continue to work your way. Unemployment in this country has been and will continue to be extremely low. In any metro, two people can find jobs making 50-70k pretty regularly, many not even requiring a college degree.

I think many of you have been sold a bill of goods on what it takes to start a family. Its hard work for sure, but its not a logistics issue or a money issue. The key is two loving parents working together.

[Anonymous]

For the folks that think "The Day after Tomorrow" is a documentary set in the near future. Then yeah... you may not want kids. It won't happen, but at least you won't have to worry so much.

[Anonymous]

Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

Let's see if you still feel the same way after 20 years and climate change makes food and water scarce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

NP I disagree and I have 2 kids. I very much understand why a lot of people don't feel they can have kids due to finances and emotionally, not wanting to subject them to modern challenges we have.

X, Y and Z are real issues and not pretty. I think on a certain level, it's a lot of selfishness to have kids and again - I say this as a current parent - just because it's possible to be prosperous, does not mean that's enough. There are problems in this society and in our country that are profound. It's not just money at all. It's a culture, attitude, reality. You also don't know what experiences each individual has so I think you should respect those who wish they would want a kid but for a lot of reasons, don't want to have them. It's DEFINITELY because of current times in the US.

[Anonymous]

I wouldn't have kids (I have 2) if I was in my 20s now.

My girl and boy in their teens have said they do not want kids. I have no problem with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Kids and cost of living are too expensive if you have a job in a top 15 metro area. About 100m Americans live in the top 15 metro areas, or about 30% of the country.

At current interest rates, a 31 year-old Millennial couple (peak baby birthing time) need a household income of $250K to buy a decent home an acceptable school district, two cars, daycare, student loan payment, retirement contribution, plus weekly expenses (food, diapers, medical costs, utilities, etc.) AND not feel completely on edge of losing it.

At a $250K HHI, you're already at the 92nd percentile of American households. But 30% of Americans live in a top 15 metro area and are dealing with a huge run up in RE prices and now interest rates.

How is a 31 year-old Millennial couple supposed to buy their first home and have a baby? It's literally not possible unless they are pulling in $250K or have family $$$$.

The math doesn't math. I'd skip kids too. We got lucky in that we are elder Millennials who bought in 2017.

We make $500K today and there's no way we could afford our current house at the current prices and interest rate without a lot of pain and skimpy budgets by the end of the month.

Meh, I think the anxiety of this upcoming generation is really strong and leads to the idea that they need everything in its place. It's just not reasonable. Probably access to too much information has led to this.

You don't need to own a home at 31. Used cars work great. I think people' priorities are a bit focused on things rather than family. And thats ok; it's just different.

But you can raise kids just fine on 100-150k starting out while you work towards making that 250k HHI.

I’m not sure that you could in an expensive metro area. Let’s say you had one person making $80k and one making $50k. For a total HHI of $130k. Full time day care for even 1 baby + any student loan repayments are going to absolutely kill your budget. And that’s before, you know, HOUSING. And food, and utilities, and a car payment and insurance even on a used car. There’s only so much “don’t take vacations and cook all your meals at home!!!” Saving around the edges that a person can do.

[Anonymous]

You can throw money at people like they do in many countries and they still won't have kids.
I have 5 childless family members (mid to late 30s) who all have good jobs and houses. One of them is unable to find a partner due to ASD and ridiculously high standards. The others have given the following reasons:
1. "We're not done having adventures yet. Maybe someday when we feel like we've traveled enough"
2. "I still feel like a kid myself and that's just way too much responsibility. We love going out and then sleeping in every weekend"
3. "Global warming, plus none of our friends have any and it would be weird to be the first. We couldn't hang out anymore"
4. "We definitely want to maybe 5 years from now after we've done our bucket list trips"
So in my family no amount of money can top the allure of global travel and FOMO. I have no idea what could be done politically about that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

Are you suggesting having children is a moral imperative? Do you think less of people who choose not to have children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can throw money at people like they do in many countries and they still won't have kids.
I have 5 childless family members (mid to late 30s) who all have good jobs and houses. One of them is unable to find a partner due to ASD and ridiculously high standards. The others have given the following reasons:
1. "We're not done having adventures yet. Maybe someday when we feel like we've traveled enough"
2. "I still feel like a kid myself and that's just way too much responsibility. We love going out and then sleeping in every weekend"
3. "Global warming, plus none of our friends have any and it would be weird to be the first. We couldn't hang out anymore"
4. "We definitely want to maybe 5 years from now after we've done our bucket list trips"
So in my family no amount of money can top the allure of global travel and FOMO. I have no idea what could be done politically about that.

All of these are smart reasons. My friends who had children in their 20s all divorced in their 30s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Parenting is an experience that some people would like to have and other people would not. No judgment either way.

I really think this is a large part of it. Everywhere that there's a choice to have fewer or no children, people have opted to have fewer or no children. And the stigma that used to come from being childless - especially for women - is largely gone.

[Anonymous]

For all you saying that having kids is selfish, that is only true on a social levels, perhaps, if you are obsessed about global warming. On a personal level, in terms of personal growth and development, having kids is absolutely a lesson in humility and self sacrifice. I can't think of anything else more selfless than everything we parents do for our kids on a daily basis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For all you saying that having kids is selfish, that is only true on a social levels, perhaps, if you are obsessed about global warming. On a personal level, in terms of personal growth and development, having kids is absolutely a lesson in humility and self sacrifice. I can't think of anything else more selfless than everything we parents do for our kids on a daily basis.

But us is still all about how you feel in the end. That is the definition of selfishness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yikes, most of you have way too much anxiety. No wonder the kids are so anxious and depressed. Repeat after me. You live in the most prosperous community that has ever existed in human history. If you cannot find a way to have a child that you want in this society, then it's not our country that is the problem (and I'm not saying country is perfect). It's you.

For those who don't want kids, great. Don't have them. It is the people who claim they would love kids but just can't because of x,y,z.

“Yikes, some of you have way too little empathy.”

Global warming isn’t going to spare the US, and just because you’re fat and happy, figuratively speaking, doesn’t mean everyone is. Again, many people are essentially barely surviving despite having done everything “right.” My husband and I did everything right and have a comfortable result, but we understand the enormous luck that we got at various points. I understand that our fellow millennials aren’t all equally situated.

Grow a clue, in other words.