Your teen says they are leaning toward the military…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you react as a parent today when your kid says they are thinking of joining either the Marines or the military.

I'm an Air Force veteran (officer), ROTC grad, and served for several years in the early 2000s and then got out to go to law school. A flat no for my DD, at least right now. Look, sexual harassment and assault is still an enormous problem. We'll see where it is in a decade, after the culture has finally adapted to having sexual assault prosecution decisions taken away from commanders. But even then, rejoining civilian life after the military is very very difficult and military service does not prepare you for the civilian workforce, no matter what the sales pitch says. Most people are not as lucky as I have been to get to a good law school and become a federal attorney.

Enlisted spouse. The military can prepare you depending on your career field. My spouse had no issue getting a job after he retired. But, he got a marketable degree before he retired. The officers and others push degrees but they don't teach that you need a degree that leads to a career when you leave or retire. That is the issue. Hate to tell you, that many are doing as well as you or better, even enlisted.

Harassment and assault is everywhere.

With respect, I doubt it. But I understand your point, and I in no way meant anything negative about your husband. I thank him for his service. Harassment and assault is everywhere, but one gives up a lot of rights to fight back in the military, and one gives a lot of control of ones life to superiors who may or may not be part of the good ol' boys network.

Sex assault rate for the military is the same as for college campuses. Will you let your DD live in the dorms?

New sex assault rules give tons of avenues for victims - prosecutors that specialize in sex assault, prosecutors that represent victims rights, change in unit, removal of accused from the unit.

So many federal attorneys served. I am one. I went to a 4th tier law school. My office is filed with people like me. Most federal attorneys did not attend prestigious law schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How do you react as a parent today when your kid says they are thinking of joining either the Marines or the military.

Marines is the military.

I went through this with three kids. One was also interested in become a police officer.

I’m from a military family. It passed for all three, but it would have been okay if it didn’t. All work places and careers are dangerous and toxic these days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you react as a parent today when your kid says they are thinking of joining either the Marines or the military.

Marines is the military.

Ask any Marine and they will bet to differ. There is the Military and then there are the Marines.

My teen daughter is looking at joining if they will take her. We support her 100%

[Anonymous]

You may want to point him towards the IDF, where they are fighting for a good cause and desperately need more manpower to truly destroy Hamas. My son emigrated to Israel and joined IDF after 10/7 and me and my husband are currently in the process of renouncing our citizenship and emigrating as well, so it is very possible!

[Anonymous]

Enlisting in the Navy his senior year of high school was the best decision my nephew ever made. He spent 10 years in Japan, where he met his wife. Bought a house at 28. He's been to more countries than I can count, and is working on his college degree. Next year, because of his exemplary service, he will become a commissioned officer even without the degree.

He has a life now that could have been working at Home Depot. He is one of the people I most admire.

[Anonymous]

I didn't read the responses, but my kid went through this too. Started talking about military service in 10th grade. We are not a military family so he had no direct model for what this life looks like.

We were supportive from the start, but had some preferences. Specifically, we didn't want our son looking at a military academy. I realize that is against conventional wisdom, but with covid our kid was socially/emotionally delayed and I did not want him going to a place that would pretty much make decisions for him 24/7. That wouldn't have been great for his development as a person.

He eventually decided to join ROTC at his university (not pursue a scholarship, which suggested to me he wasn't sure if he'd stick with it) and completed the first semester and then decided to withdraw.

I never thought he was 100% on board, maybe more uncertain about "what the hell do I do with my life", but I told myself I'd ultimately support any path he choose despite my fears or misgivings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You never responded about how many children you have. Only child? It’s a flat out no for me. Maybe Air Force WITH PILOT TRAINING ONLY. Have to come out as a pilot able to drive for Amazon or UPS or major airline.

NP. Our kid talks about enlisting and he wants to do this. We keep explaining that he needs to get some sort of education first to in as an officer. No one can just enlist and demand they want to learn how to fly. There’s no guarantee you will ever be near a plane.

The other thing we tell him is that he has a hard time taking orders from authority and admits he doesn’t like it so the military is not the best choice.

Maybe he can take private lessons first and get a pilot license? The women on the bachelor franchise will fight over a pilot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You never responded about how many children you have. Only child? It’s a flat out no for me. Maybe Air Force WITH PILOT TRAINING ONLY. Have to come out as a pilot able to drive for Amazon or UPS or major airline.

You think pilots are safe? Sure...

No. I understand the risks of the military. I have a lot of family in the military. I think the benefits of being a commercial pilot are worthwhile.

[Anonymous]

I would literally do anything to dissuade my child from going into the military. This would not be OK with me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would literally do anything to dissuade my child from going into the military. This would not be OK with me.

Why?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How do you react as a parent today when your kid says they are thinking of joining either the Marines or the military.

I'm an Air Force veteran (officer), ROTC grad, and served for several years in the early 2000s and then got out to go to law school. A flat no for my DD, at least right now. Look, sexual harassment and assault is still an enormous problem. We'll see where it is in a decade, after the culture has finally adapted to having sexual assault prosecution decisions taken away from commanders. But even then, rejoining civilian life after the military is very very difficult and military service does not prepare you for the civilian workforce, no matter what the sales pitch says. Most people are not as lucky as I have been to get to a good law school and become a federal attorney.

Enlisted spouse. The military can prepare you depending on your career field. My spouse had no issue getting a job after he retired. But, he got a marketable degree before he retired. The officers and others push degrees but they don't teach that you need a degree that leads to a career when you leave or retire. That is the issue. Hate to tell you, that many are doing as well as you or better, even enlisted.

Harassment and assault is everywhere.

With respect, I doubt it. But I understand your point, and I in no way meant anything negative about your husband. I thank him for his service. Harassment and assault is everywhere, but one gives up a lot of rights to fight back in the military, and one gives a lot of control of ones life to superiors who may or may not be part of the good ol' boys network.

Sex assault rate for the military is the same as for college campuses. Will you let your DD live in the dorms?

New sex assault rules give tons of avenues for victims - prosecutors that specialize in sex assault, prosecutors that represent victims rights, change in unit, removal of accused from the unit.

So many federal attorneys served. I am one. I went to a 4th tier law school. My office is filed with people like me. Most federal attorneys did not attend prestigious law schools.

Not sure what your point is. I said in an earlier post how the new rules work out, but I don't trust that military culture is going to change to protect sexual assault victims that quickly (e.g. retaliation, blacklisted career, etc.) The OP was asking what we would say if our child wanted to join the military. My answer is a firm no. Other people may have different views, but that's my mine.

As to whether so many federal attorneys served, that wasn't the point. The point is that there aren't many non-JAG, non-doctors that wind up having great jobs after the military. And for every former JAG who got a federal attorney job, there are a great many doing DUI and criminal defense and advertising in base papers all across the land. There aren't that many federal attorney jobs to go around, especially the desirable ones.

[Anonymous]

My husband is retired military Intel officer. He has had excellent opportunities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband is retired military Intel officer. He has had excellent opportunities.

What were they?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is retired military Intel officer. He has had excellent opportunities.

What were they?

Not sure what you are asking. I’m not going to disclose details.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is retired military Intel officer. He has had excellent opportunities.

What were they?

Not sure what you are asking. I’m not going to disclose details.

You can't say generally what the opportunities were? "Excellent" is a subjective term. On DCUM, getting a job at a federal contractor as an intel analyst would not be "excellent", for example.