Accused of racial bias at work by someone, and I feel sick over it

[Anonymous]

I think your professional mistake was not noticing there was a lead author and then was compounded by not deferring to her when she was interrupted in the interview and not featuring her in the final write up.

I don’t understand the excuse that you ‘weren’t told’ she was the lead author when presumably you at least skimmed the paper in your research? I see no racial bias in this but an uncomfortable amount of negligence on your part.

[Anonymous]

You have falsely been accused of racial bias because she misunderstood the statement. You have, on the record, the statement. You should demand her retraction of the statement.

The rest is noise. Stop re-examining every action.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I too was once accused of racial bias in the workplace -- in fact, I was sued over it and won the case -- so I totally understand the gut punch and defensiveness that you are feeling. I wouldn't reach out to the woman who you offended, because she feels what she feels and it's highly unlikely that whatever you say will in any way make her feel better.

But you should learn from your mistake, because yes you definitely made one. It was your job to make sure that the voices of both of your interviewees were equally heard, and not to allow the louder one to drown out the quieter one. In the future, work harder to make that happen. Don't pin the blame on the white guy here; this is on you.

Sorry.

Genuine question: So what about the person who is quiet and therefore less heard? Where is their responsibility?

Exactly, how was OP to know that the woman hadn’t decided to just left the guy do the talking? Obviously there was the unfortunate miscommunication where the woman thought OP told her to be quiet but all OP asked was for them to talk one at a time. Why would them OP assume anything was amiss when the woman didn’t chime in again?

She should have known when the woman who was so actively engaged shut down after OP’s reprimand. And, OP should have given equal play to both of she viewed them as co-authors. I am one who thinks OP really blew it here.

+1


I also think that we KNOW that men's voices get heard over women's, and certain races are overlooked in favor of others. We know some voices are silenced. So when you are part of marketing team, you actually would make an extra effort to get balanced voices.

OP wanted to get the best quotes for her article. That is her right. It’s not her fault that those came from the man.

- a woman

OP wasn’t writing an article. She was writing a marketing piece. When marketing, best quotes aren’t what counts. Accurately representing the product is her job. She blew it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think your professional mistake was not noticing there was a lead author and then was compounded by not deferring to her when she was interrupted in the interview and not featuring her in the final write up.

I don’t understand the excuse that you ‘weren’t told’ she was the lead author when presumably you at least skimmed the paper in your research? I see no racial bias in this but an uncomfortable amount of negligence on your part.

This is what I think, too?

[Anonymous]

I’m a soft spoken woman. Sometimes I’m very content with my male lawyer coworkers talking over me. I often agree with them. I’ve realized that when I want to speak up I do. Something I can’t stand is when a male subordinate who worked for me kept overshadowing me in meetings. Hell no. And the worst part was that I could see that people thought he was the lead. I deliberately made sure I started all meetings and assumed the lead.

Something I appreciate is when people ask for additional comments by email after important meetings are done. This gives quiet people (or our engineers who aren’t always the quickest to answer because they need time to make sure they’re right) time to formulate answers.

I don’t think op did anything wrong. The lead author could have emailed her after and provided quotes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have falsely been accused of racial bias because she misunderstood the statement. You have, on the record, the statement. You should demand her retraction of the statement.

The rest is noise. Stop re-examining every action.

This.
I'd take it a step further and consult an attorney about suing her and the university for libel.
No way in hell would I interact with this liar or have any further business with her employer (the university.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have falsely been accused of racial bias because she misunderstood the statement. You have, on the record, the statement. You should demand her retraction of the statement.

The rest is noise. Stop re-examining every action.

This.
I'd take it a step further and consult an attorney about suing her and the university for libel.
No way in hell would I interact with this liar or have any further business with her employer (the university.)

OP was accused of racial bias not only because the lead author misunderstood what OP said during the interview, but because she unfortunately only quoted what the loud co-author had said. If she had done any pre-interview research this situation could have easily been avoided, because no one intentionally leaves out a lead author's comment during an interview especially if you are being paid to do marketing for the lead author's product.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The very broad strokes: I run my own marketing agency (not in DC, but I used to live here and still keep up on the boards).
I've been doing it for 20 years and have a really great reputation that I worked hard to earn. One of my clients is a university who wanted to publicize a research paper by two academics, so I put together a release after interviewing both authors, with the rep from the uni's comm department also on the line. I record all my calls, and this was recorded.

One of the authors, apparently the lead author -- which I didn't know, they were presented to me as co-authors -- was very young, Asian American woman who spoke more softly. The co-author was an older, very articulate white male.

At some point during the call, they began to talk over one another. I said, according to my recorded transcript: "Could one of you talk? I don't want to not hear you."

The call continued on, the story was finalized, but I quoted the man, who talked more, more in the release because he had more quotable phrases.

My longtime colleague who hired me from the uni called me yesterday and was very upset -- not at me, but at the situation, trying to figure out what happened, and said this wouldn't affect *my* relationship with the uni or future work, but that I should know that the younger woman apparently reached out to accuse me of racial bias because she thought I said, quote: "I don't want to hear you."

Now, that is not what I said, and the recording bears that out. I shared the recording with him as well as our correspondence where I gave equal attention and respect to both people.

The one thing I did was quote the man more, but the man was frankly the superior interview. It was not a racial choice. In fact, I had asked the softer woman to speak up to get her to talk more!

I burst into tears with my long time colleague. I have never had this happen before. I know people can be accused of micro aggressions in work environments all the time, but it has not happened to me, and it does not feel good, and I feel mortified. I also worry about my own reputation (although my colleague seems to have my back, and my recording bears out my side.)

DCUM, how would you handle? Do I ask to speak to these people directly? Do I let my client handle it? Will it blow over? I have been up sick, crying upset about this. I work with clients in the religious, disabilities, etc space. I feel mortified that I came off this way. Help? Thank you.

If you are going to continue doing academic work, you should know that the lead author is most important and therefore deserves most of the quotes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have falsely been accused of racial bias because she misunderstood the statement. You have, on the record, the statement. You should demand her retraction of the statement.

The rest is noise. Stop re-examining every action.

This.
I'd take it a step further and consult an attorney about suing her and the university for libel.
No way in hell would I interact with this liar or have any further business with her employer (the university.)

Yeah, that’ll help OP’s business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have falsely been accused of racial bias because she misunderstood the statement. You have, on the record, the statement. You should demand her retraction of the statement.

The rest is noise. Stop re-examining every action.

This.
I'd take it a step further and consult an attorney about suing her and the university for libel.
No way in hell would I interact with this liar or have any further business with her employer (the university.)

OP was accused of racial bias not only because the lead author misunderstood what OP said during the interview, but because she unfortunately only quoted what the loud co-author had said. If she had done any pre-interview research this situation could have easily been avoided, because no one intentionally leaves out a lead author's comment during an interview especially if you are being paid to do marketing for the lead author's product.

This is noise - The uni didn’t ask why only the co author was quoted. The uni asked about the mis-statement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have falsely been accused of racial bias because she misunderstood the statement. You have, on the record, the statement. You should demand her retraction of the statement.

The rest is noise. Stop re-examining every action.

This.
I'd take it a step further and consult an attorney about suing her and the university for libel.
No way in hell would I interact with this liar or have any further business with her employer (the university.)

OP was accused of racial bias not only because the lead author misunderstood what OP said during the interview, but because she unfortunately only quoted what the loud co-author had said. If she had done any pre-interview research this situation could have easily been avoided, because no one intentionally leaves out a lead author's comment during an interview especially if you are being paid to do marketing for the lead author's product.

OP was FALSELY accused of saying something she has proof she did not say. The lying liar who lies is a liability for the university.

[Anonymous]

Jesus. Did you even know she is Asian?

[Anonymous]

OP, don’t be the white lady who weaponizes her tears when accused of racial bias. It’s tiresome.

Use this as an opportunity to reflect. Yes, she misheard you. I’m sure you had no ill intent, but intent is separate from impact. Let’s look at the facts— you prioritized the words of a white man over the LEAD AUTHOR of the paper. The lead author who is 1) a woman and 2) a POC. It’s a bad look, OP. As a marketing professional, if this never occurred to you when writing the piece, then that is a pretty huge blind spot. Stop crying and being defensive. Be a grown up and own up to your mistake here and use it as a growth opportunity.

[Anonymous]

Stop thinking you are wrong. The author is attempting to damage your livelihood and reputation with a mis statement. I bet she’s not in tears.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, don’t be the white lady who weaponizes her tears when accused of racial bias. It’s tiresome.

Use this as an opportunity to reflect. Yes, she misheard you. I’m sure you had no ill intent, but intent is separate from impact. Let’s look at the facts— you prioritized the words of a white man over the LEAD AUTHOR of the paper. The lead author who is 1) a woman and 2) a POC. It’s a bad look, OP. As a marketing professional, if this never occurred to you when writing the piece, then that is a pretty huge blind spot. Stop crying and being defensive. Be a grown up and own up to your mistake here and use it as a growth opportunity.

Amen.