Colleges where it sucks if you’re not Greek or sporty - help us avoid them!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I know this is over-simplifying but my daughter is looking a tier lower than from what maybe she could have a shot at because we can’t afford $70-80 thousand. This sounds whiney but it feels like this makes it hard to avoid party-schools, which she would like to do. The big state schools seem so Greek and overwhelming to her — we visited some.)

Though I went to an Ivy and frats ruled the weekends because the school was so isolated.)

I went to UVA and happily avoided the frats. It can be done. She’ll find her quiet friends in other activities. Any club that meets the same night as sorority meetings is a good bet.

+1. DS graduated last year. He never once set foot in a sorority or frat house. Yes, he really said that because he's anti-greek. He had a great social life in the debating societies and poiltical clubs. The houses are all off campus so this is very doable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My twins are first years at UVA which is described as "fratty" and is a party school in many ways.Yes, that is the scene that my DD is experiencing but she is enjoying it very much and will rush in the spring. My DS is NOT into Greek life and is not involved in any athletics on grounds. He did however join a bunch of clubs which have had parties and activities where he has enjoyed himself. He is not a drinker, usually two beers is very much his limit and that happens maybe once a month. He has been stone cold sober at these club parties and still had a good time.

I went to a SLAC that was oh about 60-70% greek at the time, and yes it was the only thing to do on the weekends. Which was fine, I found a sorority that I loved and thoroughly enjoyed my time there. Prior to, I would never have said I was someone who would rush. in fact i didn't until spring sophomore year.

My point is that there are kids at every school that are not Greek. She will just have to work harder to find them.

But why should they have to if they can identify schools ahead of time that don’t have this culture? And even though you may be able to find your people eventually at a school that has a high Greek life participation, they tend to be very high profile on campus and hard to get away from.

Op - my kid had the same criteria and is very happy where she ended up. There is some Greek life at her school but it doesn’t overshadow other social activities.

Maybe because UVA is only 6k-7K in tuition a term for in-state? And is only less than a third greek. And you can have a wonderful time in the 600+ clubs there (I am not exaggerating) without getting involved in greek life?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pepperdine

Since you ventured to the west coast....and thoughts on Pomona or Occidental? I think Claremont McKenna is known for party scene...correct me if I'm wrong.

Occidental has both frats and sororities.

[Anonymous]

Avoid anything SEC

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is OP. I know this is over-simplifying but my daughter is looking a tier lower than from what maybe she could have a shot at because we can’t afford $70-80 thousand. This sounds whiney but it feels like this makes it hard to avoid party-schools, which she would like to do. The big state schools seem so Greek and overwhelming to her — we visited some.)

Though I went to an Ivy and frats ruled the weekends because the school was so isolated.)

The big state schools that have 15,000+ students might have large greek systems, but if 15% is greek, that means 85% isn't...that translates to thousands of non-greek kids for your kid to find her tribe.

This. I’ve never seen a college where the majority are Greek. Number wise it’s not possible. I personally think the bigger schools, even with large Greek systems, still have more diverse students and activities to offer them the smaller ones.

Yes it is possible. Washington & Lee is 74% greek, 76% of men participate, fewer women. And participation is EXPENSIVE It's the only SLAC I know that posts the cost of frat and sorority participation on its tuition costs page.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bates is sporty, but not divided athletes v. non athletes. No frats and has never had frats. Weirdly I think one thing that fosters community at smaller schools is having one dining hall. At a school of 2000 or so, if there are two dining halls you can bet the jocks go to one and the artsy types go to the other.

Yes, you’re right, the one dining hall thing is a big community builder at smaller schools. Especially when they only serve meals for specific periods of time.

You can see almost every other student at the school if you show up at, say, 4:45 when they start serving dinner and stay drinking coffee till, say, 6:30 when they stop. Ask me how I know this.

Agree with both of these, as a fellow small college grad, but I do remember there being entire tables in the dining hall (strategically located near the buffet line) of just the soccer team, baseball team, etc.

I went to a small LAC with 1 dining hall and 100% there were sections of the hall "claimed" by the various sororities, fraternities, and sport teams. I liked my experience but it was too much like high school.

This is my sense of it too -- only one place to eat would just highlight the divide, not eliminate it.

[Anonymous]

Often people who say their kid was totally happy without doing anything Greek then add something like “He was too busy with his competitive club soccer team.”
🙄 What about kids who don’t have an easy organization /team to drop right into?

[Anonymous]

Guardian article on rates of sexual assault committed by fraternity members vs. other male students. It's 300% higher for fraternity members. The whole system needs to go.

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2014/sep/24/rape-sexual-assault-ban-frats

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Often people who say their kid was totally happy without doing anything Greek then add something like “He was too busy with his competitive club soccer team.”
🙄 What about kids who don’t have an easy organization /team to drop right into?

You ask this on tours, especially at small town schools. What entertainment does the school sponsor on weekends. Where on campus do kids hang out? Do the dorms have social areas and are they actually used? Are there things to do in town (list things your kid would do at home: movies, bowling, mini-golf, escape rooms, whatever). Check out the list of clubs the school has and see if there are matches for your kid (hacker club, anime, origami, social issues, affinity groups, outdoor weekend adventures, etc.) Those clubs tend to evolve into social groups.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:never has she seen anything sketchy

You can only speak for yourself. You have no idea what she has seen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Often people who say their kid was totally happy without doing anything Greek then add something like “He was too busy with his competitive club soccer team.”
🙄 What about kids who don’t have an easy organization /team to drop right into?

You ask this on tours, especially at small town schools. What entertainment does the school sponsor on weekends. Where on campus do kids hang out? Do the dorms have social areas and are they actually used? Are there things to do in town (list things your kid would do at home: movies, bowling, mini-golf, escape rooms, whatever). Check out the list of clubs the school has and see if there are matches for your kid (hacker club, anime, origami, social issues, affinity groups, outdoor weekend adventures, etc.) Those clubs tend to evolve into social groups.

+1. UVA has over 800 clubs. My DS tried out for crew, joined two political clubs and one debating society ( he has no
Musical talent). There are dozens of a cappella groups, for example

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe an all-womens' school (Mt Holyoke, Barnard, Smith or Wellesley) might work. They seem to have lots of traditions, but no greek life.

Interesting the idea of traditions could sound kinda Greek life

[Anonymous]

OP what state do you live in? If you are in MD, St. Mary's in Southern Maryland is a good suggestion if they offer the major she is interested in. I went to U of Maryland and found that there is something for everyone (I was neither Greek nor sporty) but it sounds like she may be more interested in a smaller school.

If you are in VA, I don't know as much about those schools but I'm sure there is a good fit for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pepperdine

Since you ventured to the west coast....and thoughts on Pomona or Occidental? I think Claremont McKenna is known for party scene...correct me if I'm wrong.

Occidental was too much of a party school for DD. We mostly looked at larger schools (>4,000 undergrads)

[Anonymous]

+1 to all of the Syracuse commenters