Very new to this. Please be kind :)

[Anonymous]

I am 36. Naturally conceived and gave birth to 3 kids. The last was born with a birth defect which was quite upsetting - multiple ultrasounds shows nothing. I basically forced my husband to get a vasectomy but now can’t stop thinking of having another baby. It’s been on my mind for months now. I am the previous poster about sperm aspiration. Who should we see first - a urologist and then a fertility specialist? I think in our case it’s best to do an IVF. Would I need to inject hormones? So many questions

[Anonymous]

Go see a reproductive endocrinologist. They can refer your husband out as needed, but they would be the starting point for both of you.

[Anonymous]

How old are your kids? You are still pretty young, I'd wait 3 months and see if I still wanted a baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are your kids? You are still pretty young, I'd wait 3 months and see if I still wanted a baby.

7, 3 and 1. I don’t want to wait because of my age :/

[Anonymous]

I didn’t even have my first until 36. You are fine to wait.

[Anonymous]

I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. I can understand where you are coming from.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm so sorry to hear what you've been through. I can understand where you are coming from.

Thank you so much!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn’t even have my first until 36. You are fine to wait.

He is much older but I don’t want to say how old so there are no unnecessary remarks

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go see a reproductive endocrinologist. They can refer your husband out as needed, but they would be the starting point for both of you.

Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Does your husband want another child?

[Anonymous]

An RE is a good starting point. Are you carriers for a genetic issue? Yes, you'll need to inject drugs to do IVF.

[Anonymous]

In case it needed to be said explicitly, every single reaction you described is totally normal, human, and understandable. There is no way to go through these sorts of times without feeling you did it wrong. You didn't.

[Anonymous]

Your youngest is ONE (??!)
And in that year you recovered from birth, started parenting a special needs kid, "forced" your husband to have a vascetomy and then did a complete 180 about having another kid and have been dreaming of having another "for months"?

I mean this in the best possible way but you sound really flaky and not in a stable spot emotionally.

Wait a year or two and see what you think.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your youngest is ONE (??!)
And in that year you recovered from birth, started parenting a special needs kid, "forced" your husband to have a vascetomy and then did a complete 180 about having another kid and have been dreaming of having another "for months"?

I mean this in the best possible way but you sound really flaky and not in a stable spot emotionally.

Wait a year or two and see what you think.

This!

[Anonymous]

Could be a lot of stress on your marriage

I would put that concern above ALL else
For everyone's sake, the kids you have already, too

It's really not about your wants. I'm sorry