If you had a unicorn baby

[Anonymous]

My two best friends have unicorn babies and I truly don't know what they have done differently. Their babies both STTN for 12 hours by 8-10 weeks completely on their own. They have no problems napping pretty much anywhere. They have very happy temperaments and barely cry and are happy to play alone for quite a long time on the play mat or bouncy seat.

My baby is the opposite - needs constant attention and always wants to be held. Still wakes up 1-2x per night and is a crap napper. Isn't content for more than a couple minutes when playing. Hates the car seat with a passion which makes driving really hard.

Ironically, both of my friends are pretty high strung and not relaxed at all (which they happily admit to and joke about). Their DH's are both a bit more laid back. However, my DH and I are both very relaxed and easy going.

One thing I have thought of is that my baby was born at 36.5 weeks and both of their were born at like 41 weeks - wonder if that could have something to do with it. Mine also has reflux and neither of theirs do, which could contribute somewhat to the discomfort ours faces.

Humor me - if you had a unicorn baby was he/she full term? Are you and DH both super laid back? Were your other kids the same way?

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Awww she has your eyes.

[Anonymous]

One unicorn baby and one baby who was super fussy. Both C section at 40 weeks. Both DH and DW are very laid back people, but one parent has "tiger"ish tendencies due to Asian upbringing.

[Anonymous]

My son who slept through the night early was born at 32 weeks, and would go blue during his sleep and need constant medical supervision.

My daughter born at 38 weeks woke up at least 6 times a night for the first 2 years of her life. Very healthy.

They were, and are, both calm and reasonable children.

[Anonymous]

Both of my babies were as you described and continue to be laidback, mellow, happy kids. I'm not any of those things. I think it boils down to nature/temperament. Fwiw, they were both born at 39 weeks and a few days by c-section.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Because they are uptight, they may read cues from the babies and respond more quickly. My babies didn’t cry much, but I also never let them get worked up. There definitely is something to temperament, but if you train your baby to cry when she needs something, that’s how she will ask... maybe watch and see how they feed the babies before they are too hungry, put them down for naps before they are overtired, etc. It’s not necessarily how the parents are responding, but might be worth changing up what you’re doing to see if you might make your own baby easier...

[Anonymous]

Reflux can definitely affect a baby's temperament and ability to sleep/nap. I had fraternal twins, one unicorn baby, and one with reflux, who made life very challenging for a while. Both have been easy to parent once they got past the infant stage.

[Anonymous]

OP, my child was an extremely fussy, unhappy baby and toddler. No reflux, just her grumpy personality. I barely have any pictures of her smiling in her first 2 years. I joke that I'm still suffering from PTSD from those years.

However, DD is now 4 and is a complete joy and very easy going. Some of the "easy" babies I knew became much harder to parent as they aged.

It's a personality thing. Just accept this and try not to compare your child to other kids (it's really hard, I know).

[Anonymous]

Personality is so much of it. Also things like reflux and how well and easily they digest. 1/3 babies have colic or pretty much unexplained fussiness. Shows up around 3-4 weeks and nothing to do about it but wait it out (this is not the diagnose-able issues like reflux etc)

[Anonymous]

Three unicorn babies. Oldest was hell on wheels as a teen and is now a delight at 25. Middle kid was a whiner as an elementary school kid; now a mesch at 23. Youngest was a tyrant until about age 9; now a gem of a young woman at 19. DH is laid back; I'm pretty calm, but can explode at times. One thing I've learned in a quarter-century of parenthood -- you are not in control. At all. Dog is my copilot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, my child was an extremely fussy, unhappy baby and toddler. No reflux, just her grumpy personality. I barely have any pictures of her smiling in her first 2 years. I joke that I'm still suffering from PTSD from those years.

However, DD is now 4 and is a complete joy and very easy going. Some of the "easy" babies I knew became much harder to parent as they aged.

It's a personality thing. Just accept this and try not to compare your child to other kids (it's really hard, I know).

This this this. I had a “unicorn baby” until he was 2 and then he turned into a total nightmare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, my child was an extremely fussy, unhappy baby and toddler. No reflux, just her grumpy personality. I barely have any pictures of her smiling in her first 2 years. I joke that I'm still suffering from PTSD from those years.

However, DD is now 4 and is a complete joy and very easy going. Some of the "easy" babies I knew became much harder to parent as they aged.

It's a personality thing. Just accept this and try not to compare your child to other kids (it's really hard, I know).

My son was like this. I think he was frustrated because he couldn't do what he wanted as soon as he wanted - he wanted to be understood, wanted to be mobile, wanted to DO things, and until he was old enough and his body/mind were able to do them he was just so frustrated. It was really hard.

[Anonymous]

OP, I say this kindly: this way madness lies.