holding kids back from kindergarten in Arlington

[Anonymous]

Hi,

I have a 4 year old son (born in June) who I am planning on sending to kindergarten next fall when he is 5. However, as I talk to more and more moms from his preschool and a playgroup he is in, it appears that none of them are planning on sending their children to kindergarten when they are 5, but instead are waiting until they turn 6. Some of them I can understand since their kids were born in August or September so they are close to the cut off, but I also talked to one mom whose son was born in May who is considering doing this as well, meaning that he would be 6 1/4 when he entered kindergarten. There don't really seem to be any specific reasons for this other than that they feel their kids "aren't ready" for kindergarten. Yesterday at a playgroup I talked to a mom who said a friend of hers sent her son to kindergarten when he was 5, and that the boy, who was born in April, was the youngest in the class because pretty much everyone who had kids with May-September birthdays held their kids back. So, my question for all you Arlingtonians is really how common is this in our schools? I am 99% positive my son will be ready for K when he is 5 - he is starting to sound out words, can write most letters, is starting to add simple numbers, and he gets along well with his peers and easily makes friends. But it does give me pause when I keep hearing again and again that people will be holding similar aged children to my son back. Thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Send him. Trust your instincts. He will NOT be the youngest. My DS turned 5 in May and there about 8 kids out of 23 who are younger than him and another 6-8 who turn 6 between March-May. So, he is certainly NOT the oldest, but hardly the youngest. Holding back a child that turns 6 in late Spring/early Summer seems absolutely ridiculous to me and at some point the schools are going to have to address this. Someone has to be the youngest, smallest, least athletic, most immature, etc. Is my son the most mature in the class? not by a long shot, but he is a typical 5 year old boy who was 100% ready to start school. I am sure the majority of spring/early summer b-day kids are ready and it is their parents who are not. Before someone starts flaming, I am NOT talking about kids who are "on the cusp" -- late summer/early fall birthdays.

[Anonymous]

I agree with the PP. I'm not in Arlington (I'm in Fairfax County), but this issue is not unique to Arlington. If you feel your child is ready, send him. I think that lots of people treat this like a competition. I know people who decided they were holding their children back when their kids were 2, and we're talking about your everyday happy 2 year old! How can someone make the decision so early?!

[Anonymous]

I am also in FCPS. While I know many kids who were held back, I also know many that were not. It is not a universal practice. And most kids I know who were held back, were August and September birthdays.

[Anonymous]

My son's birthday is in July. I didn't redshirt him. He has no redshirted kids in his class.

[Anonymous]

I'm in Arlington - most of the kids I know who were held back were Aug/Sep birthdays although a few were earlier.

My daughter has a late summer birthday - I know the concerns are usually less about girls but she is one of the youngest and smallest in her class.

Her preschool teacher told me she believes children should enter kindergarten when they are ready to do the work. Some of the boys from her preschool class last year weren't able to sit still and do their work, weren't able to pick up writing letters or doing other things that are required of kindergarteners these days. She said that the ones who could do those things should matriculate so they can continue to grow and learn and not be held in a holding pattern just because they are young or small.

[Anonymous]

to 13:20, I don't think being able to sit still and do work are mutually exclusive. My DS, a spring birthday, can't sit still to save his life but according to his teacher he is one of the most academically advanced in the class. Ultimately, he will have to learn to sit still as the 1st grade class definitely sits and "works" more, but I am thankful that he has a teacher who understands kids need to MOVE a lot and she rarely has them sitting for more than 10 minutes before getting up to stretch or move.

[Anonymous]

Arlington preschool teacher here. Arlington has a few kindergarten readiness seminars in the late winter/ springtime. The one thing they really stress is if they are socially ready. They will learn reading and math anyways so that does not matter as much. Can he share? Does he easily make friends? Can he stand up for himself in an argument with peers? Does he lead as well as follow in play?
These questions tend to help determine how well they do in kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

I'm just curious why social readiness is so important since socialization isn't too important in K these days. In my son's K class, they hardly have any time to socialize except during recess and lunch (if they can even hear each other over the earth shattering cafeteria noise).

[Anonymous]

Thats part of the reason why, since social interaction is not supervised (like it is in preschool or at home) if they are having proplems and can't find an adult to tell them "use your words, share etc." than proplems can arise.

The social aspect is by no means they only thing to determine kindergarten readiness but as far as why people are redshirting (or at least why it is recommended) that is really what we look for.

If a child does not know their ABC's or shapes thats not as big of a deak since it will be something taught in kindergarten anyways.