"Professional" nanny vs. one who helps with housework

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

That sounds inconvenient. We (the parents) often eat out of the house, or minimal dinner, but our nanny always makes sure there are healthy meals available for our 3-year old. It would be odd for her to say, well mommy and daddy decided to have popcorn for dinner tonight so no meal for you. His meals are his meals, they aren't related to ours. I mean sometimes he does eat what we made but we didn't want to cook or not cook with him in mind. We fend for ourselves but nanny takes care of his food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

Taking care of everything related to the children is the nannies job (IMO). My priorities all fall to the child. Cleaning up after the child is part of my job. Cleaning up after adults isn’t part of my job. I have about 1.5 hours in the course of the day to do child-related chores and the rest of my time is spent engaging and teaching my charges.

Why actively teach and engage a child? Because the first three years are the most important for brain development.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

Why? Because it isn’t her job to shop, clean and do laundry for an adult. And frankly, I wouldn’t want her to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

You really don’t get how it’s different for a nanny to wash a 2 year old’s underwear as opposed to her employer’s underwear? You really have no sense of privacy or shame?

I can see why nannies need very clear boundaries - there are disgusting people who will try to take advantage at every turn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

You really don’t get how it’s different for a nanny to wash a 2 year old’s underwear as opposed to her employer’s underwear? You really have no sense of privacy or shame?

I can see why nannies need very clear boundaries - there are disgusting people who will try to take advantage at every turn.

This is the most nonsensical defense yet.

What do privacy and shame have to do with laundry? Should a "housekeeper-nanny" or just a plain "housekeeper" feel shame and that she is violating privacy because she is doing laundry? I'm not sure why your BA from some random liberal arts college gives you the right to feel shame from these tasks. And if underwear is somehow shameful, what is your excuse for being willing -- not withstanding your education and ability to impart your knowledge about a child -- to buy groceries/cook for the kid, but refuse to do so for the family to the extent there is down time during naps or preschool? Is that also shameful?

[Anonymous]

It would be choice #2 for me. Preschool will provide a lot of stimulation. The mess made by kids is amazing. Someone to help keep things neat and clean and cook something now and then gives you more time with your DC.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A 2.5 year old won't nap for much longer. So, you are going to be paying someone to basically ignore your kid so they can do chores.

OP here and as I’ve said multiple times, the chores would be for when DD is in preschool, or in class with us. Not when she’s at home.

AND the point made to you multiple times is that you will not find an educated nanny who will do household chores. Why would they when they can easily find a position without them? Your former preschool teacher nanny types don’t want to be sitting around all day and don’t do your DH’s laundry.

But try your way - let us know how it works out.

So you will change your charge’s diaper, clean up his vomit, etc, but you draw the line at laundry?

Did your schooling uniquely qualify you for diaper duty?

There are clearly aspects of the job that do not fit the traditional description of “professional.” It seems pretty convenient that you draw the line, based on your education, at light housework in light of other duties.

There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

You certainly have expanded your job title for taking care if one kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

You really don’t get how it’s different for a nanny to wash a 2 year old’s underwear as opposed to her employer’s underwear? You really have no sense of privacy or shame?

I can see why nannies need very clear boundaries - there are disgusting people who will try to take advantage at every turn.

Unless washing underwear is a euphemism for sexual favors, your righteous indignation seems misplaced.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

You really don’t get how it’s different for a nanny to wash a 2 year old’s underwear as opposed to her employer’s underwear? You really have no sense of privacy or shame?

I can see why nannies need very clear boundaries - there are disgusting people who will try to take advantage at every turn.

This is the most nonsensical defense yet.

What do privacy and shame have to do with laundry? Should a "housekeeper-nanny" or just a plain "housekeeper" feel shame and that she is violating privacy because she is doing laundry? I'm not sure why your BA from some random liberal arts college gives you the right to feel shame from these tasks. And if underwear is somehow shameful, what is your excuse for being willing -- not withstanding your education and ability to impart your knowledge about a child -- to buy groceries/cook for the kid, but refuse to do so for the family to the extent there is down time during naps or preschool? Is that also shameful?

NP here. So you don’t see the difference between a nanny changing a baby’s diapers and changing your diapers? What about feeding a baby vs feeding you? Do you wash your boss’s underwear as a part of your job?

Nannies are trying to make it clear to you that doing your laundry isn’t in their job description. Doing your dishes isn’t their job.

As others have said, if you want s housekeeper who babysits, you will have no trouble finding one. Just not a nanny.

Now, please stop your obtuse posting. You’re only embarrassing yourself.

[Anonymous]

I cannot relate to some of these "parents" who truly have no interest in their own child.

You really should not have had children. Why did you??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

Out of curiosity, how does this work once the kid is fully on solids and eating the same meals as his/her parents (which any well-educated nanny should know is the best way to establish healthy eating patterns)?

This is a really good point (OP). DD eats what we eat. Usually her lunch = warmed up leftovers from what we cooked the night before. But I would love if we could reverse that a couple times a week, i.e., nanny makes her lunch while she’s in preschool, but extra portions so that DH and I eat it for dinner too and get a break from cooking ? None of us are picky eaters and would be fine with simple food

I’m an educator-nanny type and I stop cooking for my charges when they only eat what their parents eat. For groceries, there will always be things (like milk) that the parents don’t need.

I’ve been a nanny for twenty years and the distinction between duties is pretty clear and far less confusing than you’re assuming it to be. Trying to belittle the PP is beneath us all. If you want a housekeeper-nanny type, you will have absolutely no problem finding one.

But as has been asked and not really answered elsewhere, why? As an “educator-nanny type,” why would you be willing to buy applesauce and milk, but not do shopping generally? Why will you kid’s laundry, but nothing else?

If there was really such a difference between an “educator-nanny” and a “housekeeper-nanny,” why are you willing to do housekeeping chores (short of cleaning up toys used during the day) simply because they relate to the kid?

Parents who value your education should be willing to find someone else to do menial chores relating to the kid, no?

You really don’t get how it’s different for a nanny to wash a 2 year old’s underwear as opposed to her employer’s underwear? You really have no sense of privacy or shame?

I can see why nannies need very clear boundaries - there are disgusting people who will try to take advantage at every turn.

This is the most nonsensical defense yet.

What do privacy and shame have to do with laundry? Should a "housekeeper-nanny" or just a plain "housekeeper" feel shame and that she is violating privacy because she is doing laundry? I'm not sure why your BA from some random liberal arts college gives you the right to feel shame from these tasks. And if underwear is somehow shameful, what is your excuse for being willing -- not withstanding your education and ability to impart your knowledge about a child -- to buy groceries/cook for the kid, but refuse to do so for the family to the extent there is down time during naps or preschool? Is that also shameful?

NP here. So you don’t see the difference between a nanny changing a baby’s diapers and changing your diapers? What about feeding a baby vs feeding you? Do you wash your boss’s underwear as a part of your job?

Nannies are trying to make it clear to you that doing your laundry isn’t in their job description. Doing your dishes isn’t their job.

As others have said, if you want s housekeeper who babysits, you will have no trouble finding one. Just not a nanny.

Now, please stop your obtuse posting. You’re only embarrassing yourself.

Well said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A 2.5 year old won't nap for much longer. So, you are going to be paying someone to basically ignore your kid so they can do chores.

OP here and as I’ve said multiple times, the chores would be for when DD is in preschool, or in class with us. Not when she’s at home.

AND the point made to you multiple times is that you will not find an educated nanny who will do household chores. Why would they when they can easily find a position without them? Your former preschool teacher nanny types don’t want to be sitting around all day and don’t do your DH’s laundry.

But try your way - let us know how it works out.

So you will change your charge’s diaper, clean up his vomit, etc, but you draw the line at laundry?

Did your schooling uniquely qualify you for diaper duty?

There are clearly aspects of the job that do not fit the traditional description of “professional.” It seems pretty convenient that you draw the line, based on your education, at light housework in light of other duties.

There is so much more to bring a nanny than diaper changes. (However, just today I was talking about how to do diaper changes on a 14 month old that prepares him for toilet training). And yes, I draw the line at anything that isn’t directly related to the child. I do anything and everything for the child in my care which includes his/her laundry, cooking, ordering, keeping track of class and teacher payments, his grocery shopping, organizing his closet, etc. It is a very clear line, PP, and very obvious.

You certainly have expanded your job title for taking care if one kid.

Please stop. She told you what she does in her nanny position. She does everything for the child.

Honestly, PP, her position is clear. Like it or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I chose #1. These are the most important years of intellectual development in a child’s life. I want my child engaged, playing outside, and learning with a great nanny - not watching someone vacuum.

This exactly. Plus, the #2 type who’ll do your housekeeping usually has very poor English speaking skills. My friend from Spain tells me that the Spanish speaking skills of these cleaning ladies isn’t that great either.