Nanny demanding extra money 2 days before my scheduled c section

[Anonymous]

Good luck, OP. Replace your nanny as soon as possible. I write this as a nanny.

[Anonymous]

We had a nanny that did something similar. She wanted a pay raise after we had negotiated and signed a contract. The terms were completely fair, if not generous. The nanny waited until a terrible moment and then demanded a pay raise. We told her that we could talk about that at her next scheduled review, per the contract. She ended up backing down and waiting. It did break our trust and damaged the relationship. It did feel like extortion. We would have been in real trouble if she hasn't backed down, but we were glad that we held our ground.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My nanny did this to me when I was about to give birth to my second child. She told me that she was going to be out of town and needed a raise. I was able to call her bluff. I had local parents and I told her that if she couldn’t work for the agreed wages that my parents would take over and she would be out of a job. I told her that this would be unfortunate for my first born to whom she was attached as he transitioned to having a sibling. She very quickly dropped her demands. In your case, I would pay for now and start interviewing. This is very unprofessional behavior.

OP doesn’t have any local family and can’t afford to call the nanny’s bluff. The other posters who advise you to pay her ransom and find another nanny later are spot on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here- we live in a low COL area and we pay our nannny very well. I know in my heart we have been good to her. The things we are asking her to do are things she has been responsible for all along, she has simply decided she can no longer do them.

I have trusted her completely with my kids. I have no nanny cams or find a friend tracker on her phone. She puts my 3 year old in her car and off they go to wherever she wants- target, her house, museum, visiting her friends, etc. I was only asking for a continuation of this work with more hours through the month of August.

With a raise? She deserves it.

[Anonymous]

How are people weighing in on this when we have no idea what her responsibilities/hours/pay and benefits are? We can't tell OP if she is treating the nanny fairly and compensating her well without this information. If you're asking her to stay at your home while you're in the hospital, work seven days a week, etc. then she should be making a lot of extra money for that time. It's a major inconvenience to her, any way that you slice it. She should also be getting a new baby raise, separate from that period of added hours and/or whatever else you are asking for this month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How are people weighing in on this when we have no idea what her responsibilities/hours/pay and benefits are? We can't tell OP if she is treating the nanny fairly and compensating her well without this information. If you're asking her to stay at your home while you're in the hospital, work seven days a week, etc. then she should be making a lot of extra money for that time. It's a major inconvenience to her, any way that you slice it. She should also be getting a new baby raise, separate from that period of added hours and/or whatever else you are asking for this month.

Whatever gripes maybe but you can't possibly in good conscience demand this right before OP heads to hospital for a c-section.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here- we live in a low COL area and we pay our nannny very well. I know in my heart we have been good to her. The things we are asking her to do are things she has been responsible for all along, she has simply decided she can no longer do them.

I have trusted her completely with my kids. I have no nanny cams or find a friend tracker on her phone. She puts my 3 year old in her car and off they go to wherever she wants- target, her house, museum, visiting her friends, etc. I was only asking for a continuation of this work with more hours through the month of August.

OP, living in a low COLA area has nothing to do with it. You may thing your pay is fair but it may not be a living wage for her. Your comments about no nanny cam and her doing what ever she wants sound like neglectful parenting as it is your job to know where you child is.

This x1000. WTF, OP?? So much technology at your disposal and you don’t use it? I would be ashamed to tell people my nanny takes my 3yo to random places with no supervision. Especially a nanny with such a poor character as yours obviously has. I’m guessing she’s uneducated, working under the table, etc. You can’t afford a good one, yet you choose to add another kid to the mix. Such poor decision making.

[Anonymous]

WTH PP, you have NO idea, all that is pure speculation.

OP - the crucial question that you have NOT answered is "were you going to pay her more for the additional hours you are expecting of her?"

If yes, and it was a fair wage (e.g. time and a half for extra hours), then yes, this was shitty of her. But if you're expecting extra hours for no pay increase, then you should have expected this sort of thing.

[Anonymous]

Congrats OP! Just want to say ignore the haters. And whoever thinks it’s cool to write stuff like the above esp to someone who just had or is having a baby shame on you