Best revenge you ever got on someone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Before the birth of our second child I knew I planned to divorce her so after the birth I convinced her to get her tubes tied. She won’t be giving another man children.

you need to familiarize yourself with IVF

NP and it seems like a nasty thing to do to someone. Isn't IVF really really expensive though? There's posts on the Money section about people spending tens of thousands of dollars on it.

It's not bad by DCUM standards. Tens of thousands mostly refers to older patients or people with irregularities. A young healthy woman without tubes can have quadruplets for under 20K LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I left him, I made sure to tell some neighborhood moms she was his mistress. We all live in the same neighborhood and our kids will go to the same elementary school. I wasn't going to let them pretend their relationship started after I left. So now the whole neighborhood knows she is a lying slut and that he is a cheating jerk. There were half a dozen birthday parties she didn't get invited to this year. Whoops.

This is different than revenge. This is truth. Too often women are expected to keep the secrets of our abuser and the abuse (and believe me, infidelity is abuse). Expecting women to remain silent about this abuse in order to maintain a good relationship with the co-parent, or to not look "crazy," or to "protect the children" is no different than expecting women to remain silent in the face of other forms of sexual abuse.

In the long run, staying silent about infidelity harms women's health, forces us to do the emotional work of maintaining family relationships and, by creating a false reality, teaches children the wrong message about living honestly and dealing with consequences of behaviour and setting boundaries for our own safety.

Others will criticize you, but I say, good for you for speaking the truth about what happened.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Before the birth of our second child I knew I planned to divorce her so after the birth I convinced her to get her tubes tied. She won’t be giving another man children.

Tubals can sometimes be reversed and there are other ways that medicine could help her to conceive....so don't be so sure that she's done having babies.

+1

My aunt had hers reversed after her son died from a rare disease and had another child.

Also surrogacy.

Btw why do you care if she gives another man kids if you are divorced?

+2

In any case, that's pretty messed up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I left him, I made sure to tell some neighborhood moms she was his mistress. We all live in the same neighborhood and our kids will go to the same elementary school. I wasn't going to let them pretend their relationship started after I left. So now the whole neighborhood knows she is a lying slut and that he is a cheating jerk. There were half a dozen birthday parties she didn't get invited to this year. Whoops.

This is different than revenge. This is truth. Too often women are expected to keep the secrets of our abuser and the abuse (and believe me, infidelity is abuse). Expecting women to remain silent about this abuse in order to maintain a good relationship with the co-parent, or to not look "crazy," or to "protect the children" is no different than expecting women to remain silent in the face of other forms of sexual abuse.

In the long run, staying silent about infidelity harms women's health, forces us to do the emotional work of maintaining family relationships and, by creating a false reality, teaches children the wrong message about living honestly and dealing with consequences of behaviour and setting boundaries for our own safety.

Others will criticize you, but I say, good for you for speaking the truth about what happened.

I wasn't going to post on this thread, because I certainly don't consider what I did to be revenge, but I told everyone my husband was cheating on me. I didn't do it hysterically, or blast it on FB or anything like that, but when I was with people one-on-one I certainly told them. These were people I was close with and why wouldn't I tell them what hell I was going though? (I was pregnant when I found out.)

Ironically, or not, no one cared. Or at least didn't care enough to cut him off. Everyone says it's so terrible, but the proof is in the pudding. YMMV.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best revenge I ever got was actually my ex’s revenge that backfired on her.

We divorced and we shared custody. She would bad mouth me to the kids. Flake out on drop-offs. She tried to do things to sabotage my relationships with my kids – telling me that event/game times had changed. Hauled me into court at every turn. Very similar to what PP did. It is irrelevant here but, on the advice of my lawyer, I saved and documented EVERYTHING and formalized every communication. Kids got older and openly questioned why the math was not adding up – things she was saying about me were not the same things they saw. Still, I never said a bad word about her to them. Just did the best I could. Final straw was she lost her mind when my oldest DD (who was a teen) accused her of manipulating her relationship with me. They had a big blow up and, although they have made peace, their relationship has been changed forever. She now sees her mom differently. They all do.

Moral of the story: Move on and try to find happiness. Revenge is not all is cracked up to be and can bite you in the behind if you are not careful.

I don't understand how this plays out in practice. When the kids are older do you just pull out a binder full of e-mails and texts and let them read through them? I'm not in this situation so I can't relate to how kids think but it just seems like it would be weird having them read historical information and connecting all the dots. Like, her telling you that the time of an event changed so you missed it. Just seems like an older kid wouldn't remember that specific event and what time it was or whatever.

No...if you notice I said that me documenting everything was irrelevant to how the kids reached the conclusion. I saved everything in case she hauled me into court - which she did many times. But the kids were able to see things for themselves.

TBH, you would be surprised at what kids remember and the impact things have. The reason this all came to a head is because my DD emailed me herself to remind me of the time of a game and I told her that I thought the game time had changed. She, being an intelligent 14YO, put 2 and 2 together and confronted her mom about it. As part of the confrontation, she mentioned 2-3 other events over the years that I missed because of "time" issues. Given that I am pretty prompt and responsible otherwise, she figured out that something was amiss.

[Anonymous]

Looked amazing when his new GF had put on a LOT of weight.

[Anonymous]

My ex cheated with a woman who was a christian minister. I contacted the head minister of her church and asked (sincerely) to be counselled on how to handle a marital problem I was having due to one of her team. Minister assured me that the OW would not be ostracized and the incident would be kept confidential. So I told her head pastor what a slutty, marriage wrecking hypocrite the lady was.

I didn't want to turn her kids into children of divorce, but it made me happy to know that she couldn't continue to be a fake "biblical wife and mother" (the mission of her church) when she was banging a married father and lying to her spouse about where she was.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Best revenge I ever got was actually my ex’s revenge that backfired on her.

We divorced and we shared custody. She would bad mouth me to the kids. Flake out on drop-offs. She tried to do things to sabotage my relationships with my kids – telling me that event/game times had changed. Hauled me into court at every turn. Very similar to what PP did. It is irrelevant here but, on the advice of my lawyer, I saved and documented EVERYTHING and formalized every communication. Kids got older and openly questioned why the math was not adding up – things she was saying about me were not the same things they saw. Still, I never said a bad word about her to them. Just did the best I could. Final straw was she lost her mind when my oldest DD (who was a teen) accused her of manipulating her relationship with me. They had a big blow up and, although they have made peace, their relationship has been changed forever. She now sees her mom differently. They all do.

Moral of the story: Move on and try to find happiness. Revenge is not all is cracked up to be and can bite you in the behind if you are not careful.

I don't understand how this plays out in practice. When the kids are older do you just pull out a binder full of e-mails and texts and let them read through them? I'm not in this situation so I can't relate to how kids think but it just seems like it would be weird having them read historical information and connecting all the dots. Like, her telling you that the time of an event changed so you missed it. Just seems like an older kid wouldn't remember that specific event and what time it was or whatever.

No...if you notice I said that me documenting everything was irrelevant to how the kids reached the conclusion. I saved everything in case she hauled me into court - which she did many times. But the kids were able to see things for themselves.

TBH, you would be surprised at what kids remember and the impact things have. The reason this all came to a head is because my DD emailed me herself to remind me of the time of a game and I told her that I thought the game time had changed. She, being an intelligent 14YO, put 2 and 2 together and confronted her mom about it. As part of the confrontation, she mentioned 2-3 other events over the years that I missed because of "time" issues. Given that I am pretty prompt and responsible otherwise, she figured out that something was amiss.

Got it, I didn't read the sentence construction properly. Interesting, thanks for your response.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I left him, I made sure to tell some neighborhood moms she was his mistress. We all live in the same neighborhood and our kids will go to the same elementary school. I wasn't going to let them pretend their relationship started after I left. So now the whole neighborhood knows she is a lying slut and that he is a cheating jerk. There were half a dozen birthday parties she didn't get invited to this year. Whoops.

\

If the neighborhood was as tight as you claim, then the other moms already knew about the mistress or suspected.

And getting excluded from the mommy circle via bday parties? That's your "revenge?

Do yourself a favor and don't ever mention this again or brag about it. It's not flattering to you and just sounds pathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And please don't say "living my best life." YES I know that is the best, but its not applicable to me right now. Tell me the worst sh*t you did to an ex. Whether it was immediately after a break up or years later. And if not you, someone you knew who did it.

Best revenge on crazy "progressives" -- seeing Trump elected.

Enjoy your taxes going up for your so called revenge!

[Anonymous]

I read a number of these with considerable interest, as I am in the middle of a moderately high-conflict divorce. I'm a guy, so I paid particular attention to the women's posts.

And all I could think of was that the men at whom you are angry are living rent-free in your head while they move on and try to live their lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I read a number of these with considerable interest, as I am in the middle of a moderately high-conflict divorce. I'm a guy, so I paid particular attention to the women's posts.

And all I could think of was that the men at whom you are angry are living rent-free in your head while they move on and try to live their lives.

It's not as if guys never try to exact revenge, unfortunately. They may not be posting here because this site is heavily female, but I have certainly heard about it. Sometimes it takes a far more dangerous path, such as stalking or violence. Sometimes it's things like posting nudie pics or sex videos that were intended to be private. That's happened enough that there are laws against it now. Don't worry, there's enough nastiness to go around for both genders.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I left him, I made sure to tell some neighborhood moms she was his mistress. We all live in the same neighborhood and our kids will go to the same elementary school. I wasn't going to let them pretend their relationship started after I left. So now the whole neighborhood knows she is a lying slut and that he is a cheating jerk. There were half a dozen birthday parties she didn't get invited to this year. Whoops.

This is different than revenge. This is truth. Too often women are expected to keep the secrets of our abuser and the abuse (and believe me, infidelity is abuse). Expecting women to remain silent about this abuse in order to maintain a good relationship with the co-parent, or to not look "crazy," or to "protect the children" is no different than expecting women to remain silent in the face of other forms of sexual abuse.

In the long run, staying silent about infidelity harms women's health, forces us to do the emotional work of maintaining family relationships and, by creating a false reality, teaches children the wrong message about living honestly and dealing with consequences of behaviour and setting boundaries for our own safety.

Others will criticize you, but I say, good for you for speaking the truth about what happened.

I wasn't going to post on this thread, because I certainly don't consider what I did to be revenge, but I told everyone my husband was cheating on me. I didn't do it hysterically, or blast it on FB or anything like that, but when I was with people one-on-one I certainly told them. These were people I was close with and why wouldn't I tell them what hell I was going though? (I was pregnant when I found out.)

Ironically, or not, no one cared. Or at least didn't care enough to cut him off. Everyone says it's so terrible, but the proof is in the pudding. YMMV.

I think there's a difference between telling people you are close with what is going on and telling random people in the neighborhood for the purpose of messing up someone else's life, knowing and not caring that it will also affect all the kids involved (yours and theirs).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Revenge served hot:

1. I aired all our dirty laundry to one of the executive admins at his job knowing she would spread anything I told her.

Revenge served warm:

2. Told him I wanted to work things out and got him into marriage counseling and just when he thought things were settled down I served him papers while he was at lunch with clients. Awkward!

Revenge served cold:

3. Years after the divorce I found out he was getting remarried so I sued for a custodial modification by serving him on the morning of the wedding and also asking for more child support.
4. I also saved up all the medical bills for months and had a few thousand dollars of reimbursement receipts delivered to him the day they returned from their honeymoon.
5. A month into the case I dropped my attorney and started calling his attorney every day to discuss various things because I knew his lawyer was charging $500 per hour. I did that for several months until just before the hearing and I dropped the case. It cost him around 20 grand. I know this caused a lot of problems for him during their first year of marriage. It also made the kids upset with him because he didn't have money for their Christmas and birthdays.
6. Occasionally I'll agree to extended summer vacations for the kids and then play "hard to get" concerning the pickup and drop off dates. This really pisses him off when he needs to buy airline tickets because he can't really make reservations for anything until that gets worked out. He likes to make reservations in advance.

Well, aren't you just a peach!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Revenge served hot:

1. I aired all our dirty laundry to one of the executive admins at his job knowing she would spread anything I told her.

Revenge served warm:

2. Told him I wanted to work things out and got him into marriage counseling and just when he thought things were settled down I served him papers while he was at lunch with clients. Awkward!

Revenge served cold:

3. Years after the divorce I found out he was getting remarried so I sued for a custodial modification by serving him on the morning of the wedding and also asking for more child support.
4. I also saved up all the medical bills for months and had a few thousand dollars of reimbursement receipts delivered to him the day they returned from their honeymoon.
5. A month into the case I dropped my attorney and started calling his attorney every day to discuss various things because I knew his lawyer was charging $500 per hour. I did that for several months until just before the hearing and I dropped the case. It cost him around 20 grand. I know this caused a lot of problems for him during their first year of marriage. It also made the kids upset with him because he didn't have money for their Christmas and birthdays.
6. Occasionally I'll agree to extended summer vacations for the kids and then play "hard to get" concerning the pickup and drop off dates. This really pisses him off when he needs to buy airline tickets because he can't really make reservations for anything until that gets worked out. He likes to make reservations in advance.

This isn't revenge, it's stupidity. You're actively wasting resources that could be used for your kids. And yes, you're the "psycho ex" everyone talks about.

wow, you need therapy