I understand why you are so upset OP
I would also be concerned about your mother's health and well-being. It isn't normal for an adult to sleep until noon, and especially an adult with the responsibility of a toddler. |
Don't leave your kid there anymore. Plenty of people have medical procedures and don't have family in the area. You need to find a babysitter and pay her well. She will come to your house at 5am if you pay her well. |
I'm sorry OP. that is a lot to deal with - the miscarriage, medical procedure, seeing your baby neglected, and the underlying knowledge that your mom is in a bad state. I think what would be best is not to do anything dramatic - tell your mom you love her, take a few days to recover, and then go about making sure your mom is getting the care she needs. I am pretty sure that when you feel better you will feel compassion for your mom while at the same time being clear that life has changed and she can no longer care for her alone for long stretches of time. |
Not helpful, the OP said she had other options but her mother wanted to help her by watching her daughter. She will clearly not use her mother for child care again. |
OP, I'm sorry for what you are going through. How horrid.
There is a silver lining - you have learned that you can not leave your child with your mother. Thankfully nothing worse happened to her - they weren't in a car or something. I would look into seeing if you can help your mom in some way, perhaps call her doctor as it seems she needs help. Wishing you the best. |
No I am not a troll. It's not an everyday occurrence or in my case an every weekend occurrence as I work during the week. But yes I have worked for a few families that leave babies in cribs or have toddlers who roam free for upwards of 6 hrs on weekends. The older kids fend for themselves. I try and not step in as its not my place but after a 2 yr old started throwing wine bottles on the ground in the kitchen I stepped in to clean up the glass. The children wake up at 7 am the parents usually around noon. |
OP, I think it's really strange that people are saying you're overreacting and I can't imagine any mom in this situation would easily brush it off. I'd be pissed too, and certainly would never allow her to babysit again. I would be incredibly upset to think about my child stuck in a crib, wondering why he was being ignored for that long. I also agree that it could easily screw up your child for at least the next few days. She'll be fine though in the long run. |
What is wrong with you? My kids sleep at my parents' house all the time. If DH and I want to go out for dinner, we don't need to wake them up to bring them home, and they can stay home. And when we've gone on vacation without them (terrible parents, I know) it hasn't been an issue. |
I also can't understand why posters think it's so outrageous to leave a child overnight at grandma's house, as though there would be no reason whatsoever to do such a thing. |
That doesn't make it okay. |
"No I am not a troll. It's not an everyday occurrence or in my case an every weekend occurrence as I work during the week. But yes I have worked for a few families that leave babies in cribs or have toddlers who roam free for upwards of 6 hrs on weekends. The older kids fend for themselves. I try and not step in as its not my place but after a 2 yr old started throwing wine bottles on the ground in the kitchen I stepped in to clean up the glass. The children wake up at 7 am the parents usually around noon."
NP here. Now I call bull. There is no way a normal person, let alone someone in charge of children, would only step in when it's time to help a two-year-old clean up the broken bottles. |
I am curious about the demographic you work for...I don't know of anyone who does this. Who are these immature drunks that can afford to keep a live-in nanny? |
As someone who lives with them I see alot. Most people would never know. One was a couple who the mom was a lawyer and the dad a buisness owner . They were probably the most wealthy people I've ever worked for multi millionaires. Who should have hired a weekend nanny but very laxed parents to begin with. The other were everyday federal workers. You don't know what people do behind closed doors. I could write a book. So when I say it's normal it's because I have witnessed it a lot. |
The glass could have been there from the night b/f. But your mom sounds like she needs help whether she was drinking or not. Also, just so you know you can always delete this thread as the OP. Just link the thread in the website forum and ask the administrator to delete it. |
I never saw anything like this when I was doing childcare, nor did any of my nanny friends. I call BS.
I am sorry OP, I would be livid too. |