Should people struggling with mental illness have children?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eugenics is a venerable American tradition, but I am against it.

What an asinine question.

I can't believe it took 5 pages to see a response like this, but it is a 100% the only correct response.

This is not eugenics in the traditional sense. They are not saying people should be forced not to have kids, just a general question of whether someone thinks it’s a good idea or not. The reality is that life is unfair, genetic heritability is real and family history matters. This is just one factor among many people should ideally consider when they decide whether to have kids and how many kids to have.

It one thousand percent is eugenics. Should we also test the IQ of people before we determine whether they are smart enough to have children? Should we only have tall people reproduce? See how it's a slippery slope?

You don't want people who are imperfect in a million different ways reproducing. You want perfect robots. It's sick.

I think you are talking from a moral high ground here without actual experience on this issue. I never said that people should not be allowed to reproduce due to family diseases. I just said that IMO it is prudent to consider family history when you make decisions about having children. My family has a history of a genetic disease that is able to be screened for with genetic testing during IVF. We now have unaffected kids that are not at risk of dying early due to modern technology. If you have actually talked to people who have these serious genetic diseases or are married to someone with one, they would (for the most part) tell you that they are strongly in favor of screening to prevent their kids from being a victim of family history. It’s easy to say that this is “eugenics” or “immoral” when it’s not your kids that might die from a disease. But I’m not taking a 50/50 chance that my kids have a terrible disease when there is way to almost eliminate their risk that this terrible condition is passed on to the next generation of my family. I am very supportive of people having the choice to protect their kids with genetic screening and I think it should be subsidized for people that can’t afford it. I do not support forcing anyone to use it or banning anyone from having kids.

[Anonymous]

Anybody with mental illness or other heritable conditions or diseases can have all the kids they want.
But not with me.

[Anonymous]

Not all mental illness is inherented. Br a nicer person in the world and leave it a better place and likely there will be less mental illness in the future generation no matter who marries who.

[Anonymous]

Man, this is a tough one. My xH disclosed to me AFTER we had DD that schizophrenia runs in his family and it's likely DD will end up with it.

I was furious, bc I had I known back then, I probably would not have had a child with him. But I love DD so much and can't imagine live without hey, so I'm so glad she's here and wouldn't change that.

I also wouldn't want anyone telling my DD she shouldn't have children, I want her to make that decision on her own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eugenics is a venerable American tradition, but I am against it.

What an asinine question.

I can't believe it took 5 pages to see a response like this, but it is a 100% the only correct response.

This is not eugenics in the traditional sense. They are not saying people should be forced not to have kids, just a general question of whether someone thinks it’s a good idea or not. The reality is that life is unfair, genetic heritability is real and family history matters. This is just one factor among many people should ideally consider when they decide whether to have kids and how many kids to have.

It one thousand percent is eugenics. Should we also test the IQ of people before we determine whether they are smart enough to have children? Should we only have tall people reproduce? See how it's a slippery slope?

You don't want people who are imperfect in a million different ways reproducing. You want perfect robots. It's sick.

I think you are talking from a moral high ground here without actual experience on this issue. I never said that people should not be allowed to reproduce due to family diseases. I just said that IMO it is prudent to consider family history when you make decisions about having children. My family has a history of a genetic disease that is able to be screened for with genetic testing during IVF. We now have unaffected kids that are not at risk of dying early due to modern technology. If you have actually talked to people who have these serious genetic diseases or are married to someone with one, they would (for the most part) tell you that they are strongly in favor of screening to prevent their kids from being a victim of family history. It’s easy to say that this is “eugenics” or “immoral” when it’s not your kids that might die from a disease. But I’m not taking a 50/50 chance that my kids have a terrible disease when there is way to almost eliminate their risk that this terrible condition is passed on to the next generation of my family. I am very supportive of people having the choice to protect their kids with genetic screening and I think it should be subsidized for people that can’t afford it. I do not support forcing anyone to use it or banning anyone from having kids.

And you are conflating a personal decision to not have children with a prohibition due to mental illness. I'm all for people making decisions on their own whether to reproduce or not. I am not and never will be in favor of anyone else making that decision for me. How would you feel if I said that people who are unable to have children should not be able to undergo IVF?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man, this is a tough one. My xH disclosed to me AFTER we had DD that schizophrenia runs in his family and it's likely DD will end up with it.

I was furious, bc I had I known back then, I probably would not have had a child with him. But I love DD so much and can't imagine live without hey, so I'm so glad she's here and wouldn't change that.

I also wouldn't want anyone telling my DD she shouldn't have children, I want her to make that decision on her own.

My brother is a bipolar schizophrenic. I am blessed not to have any mental health issues myself, but it was absolutely in the con column when deciding to have kids or not. He has a daughter who started showing signs as early as age 6 and it solidified it for me. Fortunately, DH was as neutral on the topic as I was and we agreed it would be the best for our lives if we let the opportunity pass.

[Anonymous]

Not all mental illnesses are the same, especially as it pertains to the direct effects on children. For instance, I have known many people with depression raise relatively healthy children, but I have yet to meet an adult whose childhood survived without harm the presence of a bipolar mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eugenics is a venerable American tradition, but I am against it.

What an asinine question.

I can't believe it took 5 pages to see a response like this, but it is a 100% the only correct response.

This is not eugenics in the traditional sense. They are not saying people should be forced not to have kids, just a general question of whether someone thinks it’s a good idea or not. The reality is that life is unfair, genetic heritability is real and family history matters. This is just one factor among many people should ideally consider when they decide whether to have kids and how many kids to have.

It one thousand percent is eugenics. Should we also test the IQ of people before we determine whether they are smart enough to have children? Should we only have tall people reproduce? See how it's a slippery slope?

You don't want people who are imperfect in a million different ways reproducing. You want perfect robots. It's sick.

I think you are talking from a moral high ground here without actual experience on this issue. I never said that people should not be allowed to reproduce due to family diseases. I just said that IMO it is prudent to consider family history when you make decisions about having children. My family has a history of a genetic disease that is able to be screened for with genetic testing during IVF. We now have unaffected kids that are not at risk of dying early due to modern technology. If you have actually talked to people who have these serious genetic diseases or are married to someone with one, they would (for the most part) tell you that they are strongly in favor of screening to prevent their kids from being a victim of family history. It’s easy to say that this is “eugenics” or “immoral” when it’s not your kids that might die from a disease. But I’m not taking a 50/50 chance that my kids have a terrible disease when there is way to almost eliminate their risk that this terrible condition is passed on to the next generation of my family. I am very supportive of people having the choice to protect their kids with genetic screening and I think it should be subsidized for people that can’t afford it. I do not support forcing anyone to use it or banning anyone from having kids.

And you are conflating a personal decision to not have children with a prohibition due to mental illness. I'm all for people making decisions on their own whether to reproduce or not. I am not and never will be in favor of anyone else making that decision for me. How would you feel if I said that people who are unable to have children should not be able to undergo IVF?

I have children and they don’t have a genetic disease because I did this IVF screening. I am responding to the judgemental person that is saying it’s wrong for me to prevent my kids from getting a disease. I literally said in this previous statement that people’s decision to have children should not be regulated by government.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man, this is a tough one. My xH disclosed to me AFTER we had DD that schizophrenia runs in his family and it's likely DD will end up with it.

I was furious, bc I had I known back then, I probably would not have had a child with him. But I love DD so much and can't imagine live without hey, so I'm so glad she's here and wouldn't change that.

I also wouldn't want anyone telling my DD she shouldn't have children, I want her to make that decision on her own.

That is statistically inaccurate. In the situation where your husband does not have schizophrenia and you don’t either odds of having a kid with schizophrenia are very rarely above 10% if there is only family history on one side. Most likely that your daughter won’t have schizophrenia and that your grandkids won’t either. Your husband doesn’t understand statistics well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man, this is a tough one. My xH disclosed to me AFTER we had DD that schizophrenia runs in his family and it's likely DD will end up with it.

I was furious, bc I had I known back then, I probably would not have had a child with him. But I love DD so much and can't imagine live without hey, so I'm so glad she's here and wouldn't change that.

I also wouldn't want anyone telling my DD she shouldn't have children, I want her to make that decision on her own.

That is statistically inaccurate. In the situation where your husband does not have schizophrenia and you don’t either odds of having a kid with schizophrenia are very rarely above 10% if there is only family history on one side. Most likely that your daughter won’t have schizophrenia and that your grandkids won’t either. Your husband doesn’t understand statistics well.

On average, the odds that a kid with European ancestry will have schizophrenia is around 10% if one of the parents has schizophrenia and 40% if both parents have it. The average odds of a kid having schizophrenia if neither parent has it less than 1%. So your daughters probability of having schizophrenia even with extensive family history on the fathers side is most likely somewhere in the range of 1-10%

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not. 1000000%>

[Anonymous]

Slippery slope here. If you want to act like a N4zi and consider eugenics, I think you better start with all the poor people and drug addicts. It’d be pretty silly to say Becky from Bethesda with an anxiety and eating disorder shouldn’t have kids, but Myrtle Mae from West Virginia living in meth infested trailer should.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Slippery slope here. If you want to act like a N4zi and consider eugenics, I think you better start with all the poor people and drug addicts. It’d be pretty silly to say Becky from Bethesda with an anxiety and eating disorder shouldn’t have kids, but Myrtle Mae from West Virginia living in meth infested trailer should.

This is a fallacious argument. There is no slippery slope when families are allowed to make their own decisions about this. I screened my embryos for estimate IQ before we made a transfer decision.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man, this is a tough one. My xH disclosed to me AFTER we had DD that schizophrenia runs in his family and it's likely DD will end up with it.

I was furious, bc I had I known back then, I probably would not have had a child with him. But I love DD so much and can't imagine live without hey, so I'm so glad she's here and wouldn't change that.

I also wouldn't want anyone telling my DD she shouldn't have children, I want her to make that decision on her own.

My brother is a bipolar schizophrenic. I am blessed not to have any mental health issues myself, but it was absolutely in the con column when deciding to have kids or not. He has a daughter who started showing signs as early as age 6 and it solidified it for me. Fortunately, DH was as neutral on the topic as I was and we agreed it would be the best for our lives if we let the opportunity pass.

Wow. What kind of symptoms present at 6 years old, if you don’t mind my asking?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man, this is a tough one. My xH disclosed to me AFTER we had DD that schizophrenia runs in his family and it's likely DD will end up with it.

I was furious, bc I had I known back then, I probably would not have had a child with him. But I love DD so much and can't imagine live without hey, so I'm so glad she's here and wouldn't change that.

I also wouldn't want anyone telling my DD she shouldn't have children, I want her to make that decision on her own.

That is statistically inaccurate. In the situation where your husband does not have schizophrenia and you don’t either odds of having a kid with schizophrenia are very rarely above 10% if there is only family history on one side. Most likely that your daughter won’t have schizophrenia and that your grandkids won’t either. Your husband doesn’t understand statistics well.

DP. Those numbers matter, but what also matters is the posters ability to deal with the stress of knowing that her child has a 1-10% of having a serious mental illness and spending her life holding her breath waiting to see if that will be the case. She decided that would be too much for her and knew her limit. That must not have been an easy or even fair choice for her. I would never judge someone in that position until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes.