Dating scene at state schools

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I’m more concerned. she’s ok for now. It’s not about having a boyfriend per se, but seemingly lack of quality guys period. Just more hookup and party. I would have loved ot see her a private school but he likely wouldn’t have gotten in in this landscape and only wanted warm.

Private schools really aren’t different when it comes to dating. Plenty of hookups there and carryover long term relationships. College in general is a big hookup culture, regardless of which college or location, especially freshman year.

+1
Private vs public has zero to do with the college dating scene.

Except its easier to meet people
at the smaller schools because your classes are much smaller. My state school freshman is in lectures of 100-500 kids. Her NESAC friends are in lectures of 20. They have met guys with far more ease and have been asked out although I wonder if the pool will quickly seem shallow.

My state school kids have only had classes of about 100 in a few freshmen seminars. All the other classes are much smaller.

As someone who attended a NESAC, I can attest that yes, that small pool will definitely start to seem shallow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is there seriously hook up culture at Ivies, NESCAC, and small privates? BU BC Tufts Lehigh?

Seems most have serious relationships quickly and they stick.

This has got to be satire. OF COURSE there is hook up culture at those schools!! These are college-aged kids. Some of you seem delusional about this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Transfer in hopes of finding a boyfriend? Are you serious?

+1
Now I’ve heard everything. My kids are at state schools and have no issues with dating.

Are they freshmen? Maybe it’s a southern problem

[Anonymous]

You all know way more about your kid’s hook up habits than I ever will! (And I have both daughters and sons do not a gender thing).

They would die before discussing this with me. The most I info ever get is whether they went to the formal with a date or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's November. I would give it some time.

I would also be worried about the guy she does finally end up with if she is this desperate for a boyfriend. Desperation drops standards.

It’s November.

99% of the high-school romances carried over into college will soon be over. Just watch.

This. OP, you should not even entertain the notion of your student transferring because they aren't dating someone yet.

If your kid is suggesting this, I would knock it down fast - this is not a reason to go through *all* of the work of transferring after only two months.

If they aren't suggesting this, you need to enroll in a pottery class and give yourself some distractions from thinking about your young adult's love life. Take a breath.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Based on my kid’s school Reddit and anecdotes from friends with kids at other state schools, it sounds like a lot of kids use dating apps - which is the saddest thing I have ever heard. I’d love to hear theories about this.

Really?? as freshmen? At privates too? Very sad, agree.

Very true. My son, tall, smart and good looking, only dates through dating apps., Snapchat, Tinder, Instagram DMs, etc. He says no one approaches girls in person, apparently that's creepy nowadays.
He's not a "Frat/bro", but very much part of the hook up culture...

I would love for him to find a girlfriend in College but, of course, what does MOM know!

[Anonymous]

So there is nowhere a woman has the “pick of the litter” just guys at small to mid privates?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You all know way more about your kid’s hook up habits than I ever will! (And I have both daughters and sons do not a gender thing).

They would die before discussing this with me. The most I info ever get is whether they went to the formal with a date or not.

Cue the poster telling you how sad it is that you aren’t close to your kids like they are. (I completely agree with you, though.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there seriously hook up culture at Ivies, NESCAC, and small privates? BU BC Tufts Lehigh?

Seems most have serious relationships quickly and they stick.

This has got to be satire. OF COURSE there is hook up culture at those schools!! These are college-aged kids. Some of you seem delusional about this.

But for OPs daughter, there is nothing whatsoever wrong with that. College is the perfect time for her to gain sexual experience, meet guys, experiment with what feels good, discover sexual chemistry, and refine her sexual tastes in men.

OP’s only role (if any) here is to buy tons of condoms for her daughter and make 100% sure she understands she needs to make him use a new one, every time, ALL the time (even for oral). This is basic safer-sex 101; every girl going to college needs to hear this well ahead of setting foot on campus (where she WILL get dated / bedded at some point).

[Anonymous]

Typically doesn’t happen freshman year from the students I see. Most of the frat brothers in DS’s frat don’t have GFs until junior year. There are a lot of meet and greets and ‘Coke or coffee’ date nights, also new date to every home game. They are being social!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Typically doesn’t happen freshman year from the students I see. Most of the frat brothers in DS’s frat don’t have GFs until junior year. There are a lot of meet and greets and ‘Coke or coffee’ date nights, also new date to every home game. They are being social!

Where do kids take dates to games?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Based on my kid’s school Reddit and anecdotes from friends with kids at other state schools, it sounds like a lot of kids use dating apps - which is the saddest thing I have ever heard. I’d love to hear theories about this.

Really?? as freshmen? At privates too? Very sad, agree.

Very true. My son, tall, smart and good looking, only dates through dating apps., Snapchat, Tinder, Instagram DMs, etc. He says no one approaches girls in person, apparently that's creepy nowadays.
He's not a "Frat/bro", but very much part of the hook up culture...

I would love for him to find a girlfriend in College but, of course, what does MOM know!

It's funny b/c that stuff seems creepy to me. I know Snapchat is used for meeting people, but it's definitely more for flirting and hookups than dating. My kid hates it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Typically doesn’t happen freshman year from the students I see. Most of the frat brothers in DS’s frat don’t have GFs until junior year. There are a lot of meet and greets and ‘Coke or coffee’ date nights, also new date to every home game. They are being social!

Where do kids take dates to games?

Schools in 1996.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like you would be happier with a religious school for your daughter OP. At BYU 25% of the students are married. But she’d have to convert.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So there is nowhere a woman has the “pick of the litter” just guys at small to mid privates?!

Harvey mudd

Something tells me Madison and Madeline don’t want the median mudd boy