Household Rules when Family Visits

[Anonymous]

Our household is pretty lax. Our rules -
- kitchen and pantry is always open. Feel free to fix yourself a meal, coffee, snack etc 24/7
- Freshen up the communal bathroom/toilet after use. We have clorox wipes, lysol spray, windex etc in the bathroom.
- Feel free to use our assigned vehicle for your use. We keep the tank full.
- No smoking, vaping inside our house. We do serve alcohol in the evening.
- No raised voices or unpleasantness in our house.
- Let us know what you want to eat for all the three meals a day before.
- Feel free to order takeout anytime. We keep an envelope of cash and menu cards from our local restaurants in our kitchen drawer.
- No pets.
- No shoes indoor.
- We nap in the afternoon. No noise during our nap time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our household is pretty lax. Our rules -
- kitchen and pantry is always open. Feel free to fix yourself a meal, coffee, snack etc 24/7
- Freshen up the communal bathroom/toilet after use. We have clorox wipes, lysol spray, windex etc in the bathroom.
- Feel free to use our assigned vehicle for your use. We keep the tank full.
- No smoking, vaping inside our house. We do serve alcohol in the evening.
- No raised voices or unpleasantness in our house.
- Let us know what you want to eat for all the three meals a day before.
- Feel free to order takeout anytime. We keep an envelope of cash and menu cards from our local restaurants in our kitchen drawer.
- No pets.
- No shoes indoor.
- We nap in the afternoon. No noise during our nap time.

If that's "pretty lax," I'd hate to see strict.

[Anonymous]

This feels like a situation where you either invite your brother’s family to come as they are or decide they aren’t the kind of people you want to have as house guests. We don’t spank our kids but I don’t think you can mention it without judgment. So I think your options are to host them and expect that this might happen — or don’t host them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When family visits your home, which household rules do you think are appropriate to ask guests (including relatives) to follow? How do you handle it when your family’s parenting style or values differ?

Minor things, like asking guests to take off their shoes, feel easy to enforce. The same goes for big, clear boundaries, such as not bringing a gun into the house. But what about the gray areas?

For example, my husband and I don’t allow spanking, but my brother spanked his child during a recent visit, which really upset our kids. Would you say something in the moment, ask that discipline be handled privately, or insist that your house rules apply to everyone while they’re in your home? Or take another approach entirely? My husband leans toward talking to my brother before the next visit, while I tend to avoid confrontation...so I’m curious how others handle situations like this.

You can't tell another parent how to discipline their child and unless he is actually beating the child it is none of your business.

Umm, no! Spanking is abuse. Nobody should be hitting another person, let alone an innocent child. Learn how to discipline properly, and that does not involve physical assault

I also think spanking kids is wrong, but is society there? Would CPS react if you called and told them? If not, I don’t think you can tell someone else how to manage their own kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our household is pretty lax. Our rules -
- kitchen and pantry is always open. Feel free to fix yourself a meal, coffee, snack etc 24/7
- Freshen up the communal bathroom/toilet after use. We have clorox wipes, lysol spray, windex etc in the bathroom.
- Feel free to use our assigned vehicle for your use. We keep the tank full.
- No smoking, vaping inside our house. We do serve alcohol in the evening.
- No raised voices or unpleasantness in our house.
- Let us know what you want to eat for all the three meals a day before.
- Feel free to order takeout anytime. We keep an envelope of cash and menu cards from our local restaurants in our kitchen drawer.
- No pets.
- No shoes indoor.
- We nap in the afternoon. No noise during our nap time.

If that's "pretty lax," I'd hate to see strict.

Really? What did you find not "lax"?