Around what ages are teens getting sexually active nowadays?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep seeing free time on here as a reason for kids to have sex, drink ect. Is none concerned that these kids can't seem to entertain themselves without getting themselves into trouble?

I wasn’t one that said this but I can see why.

My daughter has several extracurriculars but still managed to have sex, romance, drinking, some drug experimentation. She has high achieving friends who also do this. They are all go go go extroverts….however, she has a lot of friends who don’t seem to have any outside school commitments. What that means is that they are always available. And then you add to the mix an extroverted nature, these kids start to expand their friend groups. They are always available, so this is pretty easy to do, and they are always seeking social occasions. Once the circle widens enough, that element from some part always finds a way in.

Introverted anxious types usually aren’t getting into this stuff, at least not as a young teen. If they aren’t very busy, they are usually sitting home on their phones. Which, I’m not sure is any better than going out and drinking at a party. Truthfully, I’d rather my teen be dating and having real sex than sexting on snap with a stranger.

sticky teenaged hands wrote that sentence,

[Anonymous]

11th/12th grade most common, but some will do it earlier if they’re in a relationship. And many still lose their virginity in college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I keep seeing free time on here as a reason for kids to have sex, drink ect. Is none concerned that these kids can't seem to entertain themselves without getting themselves into trouble?

I wasn’t one that said this but I can see why.

My daughter has several extracurriculars but still managed to have sex, romance, drinking, some drug experimentation. She has high achieving friends who also do this. They are all go go go extroverts….however, she has a lot of friends who don’t seem to have any outside school commitments. What that means is that they are always available. And then you add to the mix an extroverted nature, these kids start to expand their friend groups. They are always available, so this is pretty easy to do, and they are always seeking social occasions. Once the circle widens enough, that element from some part always finds a way in.

Introverted anxious types usually aren’t getting into this stuff, at least not as a young teen. If they aren’t very busy, they are usually sitting home on their phones. Which, I’m not sure is any better than going out and drinking at a party. Truthfully, I’d rather my teen be dating and having real sex than sexting on snap with a stranger.

sticky teenaged hands wrote that sentence,

Not the PP but I rather my teens be out and socializing too - and yes, they may end up having sex. Shocking. Phones, social media, porn, loneliness, and snowplower parents are making this generation of teens depressed, anxious and introverted. Complete lack of socialization skills, street smarts, or unable to have engaging conversations with peers or adults. No thanks

[Anonymous]

How is OP defining sexuality active?

I'd say many are beginning their solo/self-sex activities before reaching double digits but by 12-13 on average.

Ask yourself honestly, if you dare: how and when did you experience your first org*sm?

[Anonymous]

My kids group— college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think there is no general answer. This is personal to your own children. Statistics are 45% of teens 15-19 have had sex. Average age for first time sex in US is 17.

Most 12-15 yr olds are not having sex. Especially if your younger teen is busy with extracurriculars and a rigorous academic schedule, and they aren’t in a relationship, chances are they are not having sex with anyone.

I would love to see a study comparing teens with more extracurriculars and “rigor” with those with less, and age of first sexual activity. My bet is the difference won’t be statistically significant.

DS was 17 - varsity sport, club sport, rec sport, 10 AP classes in HS, full time summer job...GF of 2y... evidently, they found time.

People. Stop responding to posts with information or opinions about older teens when you are in a thread talking about 12-15 year olds. Is this happening over and over because the posts are collapsed? People are saying keep 12-15 year olds busy. We can all agree 17 year olds with a girlfriend will find time to have sex.

Uh...this was the original post... OP was asking about what to expect in coming years.


My spouse & I are both immigrants from a more conservative country.

We have a 12 & 14 year old ( boy & girl) and are curious as to what to expect in the coming years. For those who have older teens, what has been your experience ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:11th/12th grade most common, but some will do it earlier if they’re in a relationship. And many still lose their virginity in college.

You mean some lose their virginity in college. Not many

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids group— college.

Same here with 1 or 2 starting at age 17 with boyfriends.
My daughter goes to a girls school so they have very limited contact with boys (which in retrospect has not been the greatest in other ways but great if pushing off sex is a concern!)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11th/12th grade most common, but some will do it earlier if they’re in a relationship. And many still lose their virginity in college.

You mean some lose their virginity in college. Not many

no, quite a few do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11th/12th grade most common, but some will do it earlier if they’re in a relationship. And many still lose their virginity in college.

You mean some lose their virginity in college. Not many

no, quite a few do.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:11th/12th grade most common, but some will do it earlier if they’re in a relationship. And many still lose their virginity in college.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: My DS lost his virginity at 15 but I didn’t find out until he was 17 and told me. Wasn’t with a girlfriend. My DD lost hers at 14 with a boyfriend she is still dating a bit over a year later. Told me pretty quickly and asked to go on BC. They only waited a few months after dating. I wasn’t thrilled as I told her to go slow but I am glad she told me to get her protection besides condoms.

Both high level honor students and play club and varsity sports. DD is in student gov too.

Most of their friends are similar but many don’t tell their parents a thing just like my son initially did. But they are both pretty open now that they are older in high school. But both of them said freshman to sophomore year is when most lose it. And parents have no clue.

Maybe in your kids' crowd? This doesn't follow the statistics.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: My DS lost his virginity at 15 but I didn’t find out until he was 17 and told me. Wasn’t with a girlfriend. My DD lost hers at 14 with a boyfriend she is still dating a bit over a year later. Told me pretty quickly and asked to go on BC. They only waited a few months after dating. I wasn’t thrilled as I told her to go slow but I am glad she told me to get her protection besides condoms.

Both high level honor students and play club and varsity sports. DD is in student gov too.

Most of their friends are similar but many don’t tell their parents a thing just like my son initially did. But they are both pretty open now that they are older in high school. But both of them said freshman to sophomore year is when most lose it. And parents have no clue.

Maybe in your kids' crowd? This doesn't follow the statistics.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: My DS lost his virginity at 15 but I didn’t find out until he was 17 and told me. Wasn’t with a girlfriend. My DD lost hers at 14 with a boyfriend she is still dating a bit over a year later. Told me pretty quickly and asked to go on BC. They only waited a few months after dating. I wasn’t thrilled as I told her to go slow but I am glad she told me to get her protection besides condoms.

Both high level honor students and play club and varsity sports. DD is in student gov too.

Most of their friends are similar but many don’t tell their parents a thing just like my son initially did. But they are both pretty open now that they are older in high school. But both of them said freshman to sophomore year is when most lose it. And parents have no clue.

So?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:11th/12th grade most common, but some will do it earlier if they’re in a relationship. And many still lose their virginity in college.

You mean some lose their virginity in college. Not many

no, quite a few do.

This is so funny that all you moms think you know this answer lol