Be honest- what do you think about women who are content to be just wives and mothers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get zero fulfillment from work personally, none. I do it for the money. I would feel fantastic having more time to workout, read, paint, garden...To me that is a much fuller life than mine now. I assume most women who are "just wives and moms" have such hobbies in addition to taking care of their families.

Yep

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You mean people like me, who are very well-read, can discuss most current events with intelligence and some background knowledge, and also earn significant passive income from my dividends?

I'm doing great, thank you. Feel free to think whatever you want about me.

Dividends, by definition, are unearned. And they don’t generate income. But more importantly, none of this unique to being a SAHM.

What are you talking about that dividends don’t “generate income”.

I am a dividend investor. My portfolio generated a little over $100,000 in dividends last year. I stopped reinvesting those dividends years ago and now use the income to partially fund my lifestyle. Yes, it is considered unearned income (taxed differently than W-2 wages), but it is still income.

These investments are in taxable (not retirement) accounts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You want me to be honest? Deep down -- I find it pathetic. But I would never say that out loud.

So what do you think about nannies and daycare workers? Is that "not pathetic" because they draw a paycheck?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You mean people like me, who are very well-read, can discuss most current events with intelligence and some background knowledge, and also earn significant passive income from my dividends?

I'm doing great, thank you. Feel free to think whatever you want about me.

That fact that you replied sort of indicates you care what people think.

I only judge those that do not contribute in any way to society - volunteer work, pta, kids activities, anything. If all they do is care for their kids, then I judge them as incredibly selfish and lazy.

And what if they're looking after a child with special needs? Or another relative? What if they themselves have a chronic illness and cannot work?
What if the special needs or illness in question is invisible to you?

Judging based on incomplete information is not wise, PP. You never know what's going on in people's lives. Have a little respect and humility.

🙄 that’s exactly what I was saying - they contribute NOTHING to society. Going down the tangent of disabilities for the parent is way off OP’s topic and you know it.

I’m talking about people who get the non special needs kids to school, hit the gym/spa/nail grab lunch with friends, pick up kids and drive them to activities. Then go home and do it all over the next day for 18 years. Then continue to do nothing outside of their own pleasures. Completely selfish.

Why is working automatically not selfish? It seems that being a working parent can be just as selfish.

[Anonymous]

The ones who are truly happy? I don’t think about them. None of us do. Happy people rarely need the attention or validation of other people. They’re not stridently posting on DCUM about the superiority of their choices. They’re not on Facebook performing motherhood. They’re not in MLMs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I want to know what their Plan B is when the kids leave for college or if a divorce happens.

They want to know what your plan B is if you get fired or your skills get outdated. And they're wondering what your plan is when your kids grow up and leave and never miss you because they didn't spend the bulk of their time growing up with you.

I think being a SAHM is fine. I'm sure it's fulfilling, and raising kids is extremely important. I was a single mom so I had to work. I think SAHMs are great. I think people who work full time and have kids on the side are horrible. That's my honest opinion.

[Anonymous]

Jealous. I have worn myself ragged trying to ‘have it all.’

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You mean people like me, who are very well-read, can discuss most current events with intelligence and some background knowledge, and also earn significant passive income from my dividends?

I'm doing great, thank you. Feel free to think whatever you want about me.

That fact that you replied sort of indicates you care what people think.

I only judge those that do not contribute in any way to society - volunteer work, pta, kids activities, anything. If all they do is care for their kids, then I judge them as incredibly selfish and lazy.

How is raising kids not a contribution to society? Who do you think society is made up of, dim bulb?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It depends HOW they do it. My mother was a SAHM and our house was always dirty and she was always laying on the couch in her nightgown watching soaps and talk shows when I came home. It wasn't some super clean house with cookies fresh from the oven after school. She never made me breakfast. She never decorated the house for any holidays. She often "forgot" to take anything out to defrost for dinner and we scrambled to pull together a meal.

So someone like that, I don't feel good. A friend of mine is a SAHM and she gets dressed each morning when her kids do, makes them breakfast, makes their lunches with them, keeps up the house, is always arranging play dates, does holiday decor, makes homemade treats for her kids to pass out to their classes for their birthdays, invites people over spontaneously, etc. She's a great SAHM. She treats it like a full time job.

I do all that and I work, so am I a superhuman (yes, yes we are).

That is a myth. You can do a lot of things but you are not giving maximum time to your children. Quality and Quantity. Own it.

+1

[Anonymous]

I don't think anything at all about SAHM and SAH wives. I'm at the point in life where I don't really care whether a woman stays home or works. We are all on different paths. It really doesn't matter.

[Anonymous]

I just can't believe anyone really thinks about us at all! Who cares?

[Anonymous]

OP, thankfully times have changed and the mommy wars don’t play like they used to 15 years ago on DCUM. I suggest you find something more meaningful to do than try to stir them up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
You mean people like me, who are very well-read, can discuss most current events with intelligence and some background knowledge, and also earn significant passive income from my dividends?

I'm doing great, thank you. Feel free to think whatever you want about me.

That fact that you replied sort of indicates you care what people think.

I only judge those that do not contribute in any way to society - volunteer work, pta, kids activities, anything. If all they do is care for their kids, then I judge them as incredibly selfish and lazy.

How is raising kids not a contribution to society? Who do you think society is made up of, dim bulb?

This made me laugh.

[Anonymous]

I'll be honest since you requested it OP.

I have a low opinion of parents who do not even want to be the primary caregiver for their children when they are infants and toddlers. I think prioritizing material things and one's own career and self-fulfillment is selfish and indicates a lack of understanding of how important it is for young children to spend most of their time with someone who loves them completely and unconditionally.

A little off of your topic but completely relevant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'll be honest since you requested it OP.

I have a low opinion of parents who do not even want to be the primary caregiver for their children when they are infants and toddlers. I think prioritizing material things and one's own career and self-fulfillment is selfish and indicates a lack of understanding of how important it is for young children to spend most of their time with someone who loves them completely and unconditionally.

A little off of your topic but completely relevant.

I couldn't agree more. Why not just skip having kids and focus on your career and financial life?