I have money, but this is where I cheap out

[Anonymous]

I avoid getting food delivered - so much markup, hate waiting, tipping the driver BEFORE it gets delivered? Ridiculous. I contact the place directly via their website and then go pick it up - hotter/colder since it wasn't riding around in a car and the restaurant gets more of the actual money instead of being skimmed by grubhub, uber, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Paying more than something is worth, like a $6 soda at a hotel, even though I can afford it (I also don’t drink soda but my kids get it on vacation). I really dislike paying such a markup for things so I’ll go to convenience stores to buy things instead.

I can totally relate. Last summer at an airport, I grabbed a (very small and simple) turkey sandwich and a bottle of water, took them to the cashier, when the price rung up at like $20 (can't remember exactly), I told the cashier I will put them back LOL. I would happily pay for a $12k dinner at a Michelin restaurant but no thanks to the ugly turkey sub.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I avoid getting food delivered - so much markup, hate waiting, tipping the driver BEFORE it gets delivered? Ridiculous. I contact the place directly via their website and then go pick it up - hotter/colder since it wasn't riding around in a car and the restaurant gets more of the actual money instead of being skimmed by grubhub, uber, etc.

I do the same. I refuse to pay the 20%+ surcharge (service fees and driver tip) for delivery. I pick up takeout or don't get it.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Food. We eat out maybe 2-3 times a week, and even then it's pretty basic (wings, Chinese). I also am vigilant about not wasting food and we eat simply at home unless it's a special occasion - lots of pasta, soup, sandwiches. I do splurge on sourdough from our local bakery - $7 a loaf!

We share a car and it is a non-luxury brand.

Clothes. I will occasionally get a nice dress from Nordstrom but only for a wedding or similar. Day to day my family wears clothes from TJ Maxx, Target, and Walmart (esp the kids). We also don't buy clothes that often. I do have a LOT of shoes - my weakness - but nothing designer. I've been using the same handbags for years.

Our house. We bought a small and not updated house and I have no interest in moving or expanding our existing space. Our mortgage is $1600 a month and we live in an excellent school district.

I do have cleaners. I consider it worth every penny.

I spend a lot on makeup (Dior, Chanel) and perfume. And I will get a professional massage/facial every month or two, which I recognize is a total splurge.

We do spend on vacations/travel.

Combined we make a very comfortable HHI. (Low-to-mid six figures.)

Both my DH and I are spenders by nature but I manage the finances, and just approach it as I would a small business. I put on my MBA hat to manage our finances and recognize that I would much rather have cash in reserves than have had a bunch of BS experiences and things.

DP - you sound very sensible .

Re: folks critiquing your eating out 2-3 times a week at cheap eateries as not frugal - I am not a fan of the “gotcha” mentality of some on DCUM - nitpicking minor details and not seeing the bigger picture - your cost cutting measures spun sensible to me and balanced by a desire for sanity. Well done getting such a low mortgage in a good school district.

I often can’t make certain foods cheaper than you can buy them at lower prices eateries in the US so we do the same. Also you are both working and saving time counts .

I agree on need for cleaner and it being worth every penny.

I diverge though on spending a ton on makeup and shoes. Just the basics for me. But hey yiu save a ton by your house and car choices so you can afford that.

So I’m one of the “2-3 is not frugal” posters. I stand by that statement in that it is not particularly “cheap” of pp to eat out that often and that was her lead. The OP is asking what you are cheap about and this is not it. That doesn’t mean PP isn’t balancing well.

Why hyoer focus on one negative detail? She/he has a mortgage of $1600 a month in modest house in good school district and driving modest cars - saving herself tons of money - it smacked of gotcha !

Totally NP who has not participated in this discussion at all. I think PP's post implies that she lives fairly frugally. However the post here is not about living frugally overall, its about what you are cheap about in spite of your wealth. So I think of this much more like the rich person at the hotel driving to 7/11 to get drinks to avoid the extra $6 they would pay in the hotel store.

That PP opened with how they eat out twice a week. Eating out twice a week is not being cheap about eating out, it just isn't. There isn't anything wrong with eating out twice a week, but it isn't cheaping out on takeout. Which again, is fine, but when you're responding to a thread where the topic is, 'what do you cheap out on' and your answer is, 'we eat out twice a week' you're going to get people focused on it because it makes no sense and if you put it as your first sentence then everyone will pick up on it!

well- we get takeout 2x a week but my spouse definitely thinks im being cheap b/c I'll get one super loaded salad at sweet green/cava and then go home and add a whole other bowl of greens and my own lemon and oil if needed and make it dinner for 3 people. I get that kind of take out a lot- it saves time and money b/c if I shopped for all of those salad fixings it would be more expensive. I'll also get takeout like cumin lamb or something (one dish) and then make extra rice and stir fry veggies to go along with it at home. That works out to be cheaper than doing full on home cooked meal.

I love this kind of takeout too. It really can be more affordable than buying all the ingredients and cooking from scratch.

Agree. I think takeout a couple of times a week doesn't mean you are not fairly frugal on food -- e.g. you can get a ton of food with a pizza or chinese order, really not sure if you can make it much more cheaply at home. Healthy it is not--but inexpensive? Often yes.

[Anonymous]

We rarely buy expensive clothing or shoes. I rarely get manicures and pedicures, and I’m not into makeup (this isn’t really cheaping out, but I don’t spend money on it at all.) we don’t throw extravagant birthday parties for our kids (at least not yet.)

[Anonymous]

My kid's school is near, I would drive there to pay for fees in person so I don't have to pay for the $3 credit card transaction fee, the front office lady looks me like "you know you can pay online?", I said "oh yes, but there is a fee", and she opened her eye wide "yeah it's only 3 bucks". OK lady, stop judging me LOL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some personal care stuff - I do my own gel manicures, keratin treatments, and facials at home instead of at a salon. It's mostly a time thing versus a money thing, since it's a pain to schedule appointments (sometimes months out) and have to block out hours in the middle of the day for that stuff. We also don't order food delivery due to the costs - we either eat out, where you at least get out of the house and can enjoy the atmosphere, or we cook at home. Mid-7 figure income.

Which kits are you using, if you don't mind sharing?
I also think this is mostly a time versus money thing when it comes to value so I'd like to do it at home, but everyone I talk to says it's not the same/ it's not worth it to do it home..

PP - I use a keratin treatment I get from Amazon called Keratin Research. It's easy to use, especially if you've already done keratin treatments in a salon and understand how they work. I do the treatment outside with a fan blowing on me to keep myself from breathing any fumes. For nails, you can get OPI and CND gel polishes from Walmart's website. I use an LED light I got from Amazon, nothing fancy. I think it's the polishes that make the difference. To remove them, just regular acetone and cotton rounds will do it. I think my home keratin treatments actually turn out better than the ones I've gotten in a salon, and my nails are about the same as the salon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Cheap prepaid cell phone service which is terrible..

We do this through T-Mobile and ours isn't terrible.

[Anonymous]

For me, we are frugal (save money) in a lot of areas.

Prepaid cell phone.
No cable.
Shop at Lidl and Aldi for groceries mostly.
Much of the same furniture (and same kitchen) as when we first moved in to our house 15 years ago.

Where I feel like I'm cheap (don't spend the money but feel I should be spending it):
Public school in DC rather than private when my parents set up a trust fund for my children's education. It's not huge but it's enough to pay for private high school, college, and likely grad school. But I just am not sure that it's worth it to go with private high school rather than public even though we're not in bound for Jackson Reed.

[Anonymous]

I suppose there must be some small number of people who both have abundant money to spend and don't care about value vs. cost, but I think most people apply these calculations.

For example, we just rebuilt our second home for $1 million. I downgraded most of the builder's suggestions. This $1500 bathroom vanity? No, I found one for $800. This $8k appliance package? No, I put one together for $4k. So that's probably why it wasn't a $1.1m rebuild. I care about things lasting; e.g. I got a well-rated Bosch dishwasher, but not a top model.

I get most of my clothes at Ann Taylor and Prana, and Target for athleisure. I care about quality, so I'll use a Tumi bag, but I don't care about branding so I'll never have a LV etc. I get really sick when I fly and I need to rest when we get there, so I'll book first class and a nice hotel suite.

I think these cost vs. value calculations are pretty normal and it's fine if people care about things that I don't, and vice versa.

[Anonymous]

All of my kids clothes are used. They wear fancy brands too. Special holiday wear comes from ebay/ BST and the rest comes from buying bags of clothes for like $10 off facebook marketplace. I shop Goodwill too. I've also never bought new toys for them. They're either gifts or facebook marketplace.

We clean, do our own yard work and never outsource anything (Dh learned how to do drywall repair, plumbing, lay wood floors, etc)

[Anonymous]

This is also a constantly changing equation as your life circumstances change. But yes we're all making these calculations constantly.

When I kinda had money (but by every objective standard had a lot of money):
Would only buy cheap clothes for my kids.
Would not outsource mowing my lawn.
Would not pay for a really expensive hotel.

Now that I have a lot of money but I'm not a billionaire:
The cheap clothes look like shit after a couple of washes of the knees have holes before the end of the season. I buy better stuff for my younger kids who are still growing and need new stuff yearly.
I'm not mowing my lawn. My time is more valuable. I'm busier than I was before. And I just don't want to anymore.
Some hotels still are a no, but my threshold is a lot higher and once you stay nice hard to go back.

Just a couple of examples. I was raised in a very frugal family and so it took me a long time to let go of many frugal habits but as time has gone on, I've somehow managed!

[Anonymous]

I never pay shipping and handling charges. If Walmart won't let me order something to ship I go to Target and buy. If Target doesn't have the item I put that item on my favorites and check back regularly. I have waited up to 6 months for a particular item.

I buy bulk short sleeve and long sleeve t shirts that go on warehouse clearance. I have enough to last 3 years. Same with certain brand pants. It's hard to pass up $3 shirts and $4 pants. I'm not looking for any clothing to last forever. I just like what I like and plenty of it. The trick is to buy off season.

There are sites that have designer handbags for pennies. Not pre owned. Personally, I don't give a damn what anyone thinks. I am in this to win this. Same with shoes. Discontinued buying thrills me. My sister LOVES the purses I send her. I have gifted purses and wallets to other women. I have yet to hear cheap cheap cheap. So what if they are cheap. I'm not looking to flaunt. Snootiness is not in my DNA. I see it this way, some can't afford handbags and wallets. I find these deals for others. I don't even carry a purse.

I just bought some Hanes no show socks. 2/12 per pack for $6. I don't need socks but I know someone that does. I bought myself long one size Hanes cotton sleep shirts. Knee length. Some were $18 a piece. I found some for $7 a piece. Color doesn't matter. I bought multiples of 4 different colors. For around the house with thermal underwear, I was comfortable when it got very cold. I love those sleep shirts.

It's funny. When my kids need things I never blink at the cost yet I prowl the internet looking for super deals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid's school is near, I would drive there to pay for fees in person so I don't have to pay for the $3 credit card transaction fee, the front office lady looks me like "you know you can pay online?", I said "oh yes, but there is a fee", and she opened her eye wide "yeah it's only 3 bucks". OK lady, stop judging me LOL.

You all are my people. Not just this poster, but so many of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never pay shipping and handling charges. If Walmart won't let me order something to ship I go to Target and buy. If Target doesn't have the item I put that item on my favorites and check back regularly. I have waited up to 6 months for a particular item.

I buy bulk short sleeve and long sleeve t shirts that go on warehouse clearance. I have enough to last 3 years. Same with certain brand pants. It's hard to pass up $3 shirts and $4 pants. I'm not looking for any clothing to last forever. I just like what I like and plenty of it. The trick is to buy off season.

There are sites that have designer handbags for pennies. Not pre owned. Personally, I don't give a damn what anyone thinks. I am in this to win this. Same with shoes. Discontinued buying thrills me. My sister LOVES the purses I send her. I have gifted purses and wallets to other women. I have yet to hear cheap cheap cheap. So what if they are cheap. I'm not looking to flaunt. Snootiness is not in my DNA. I see it this way, some can't afford handbags and wallets. I find these deals for others. I don't even carry a purse.

I just bought some Hanes no show socks. 2/12 per pack for $6. I don't need socks but I know someone that does. I bought myself long one size Hanes cotton sleep shirts. Knee length. Some were $18 a piece. I found some for $7 a piece. Color doesn't matter. I bought multiples of 4 different colors. For around the house with thermal underwear, I was comfortable when it got very cold. I love those sleep shirts.

It's funny. When my kids need things I never blink at the cost yet I prowl the internet looking for super deals.

I was waiting for you to mention 75% of your wardrobe consists of free T shirts.