rec team softball playing time

[Anonymous]

Short version: DD not getting pitching time. Say something to coach or not bother?

we moved out of the D.C. Area this winter and Dd started a new softball rec league, prior to that she played a few seasons of Rec.
she had some pitching experience and clinics. For her prior league she was one of the better pitchers and maybe the best for rec -- but that was 8u and every league is different. I'm not sure I care but I hate to see her not getting chances at this age to try things. We did not get into travel yet because I thought this would be the time to get more opportunities to play different positions.

New team (new area and older group 10u rec) has at least two decent pitchers already. These same two girls have pitched 99% of season so far. We got on this team late since we moved and I think it was kind of a fluke since we missed the evaluations...she has only gotten to pitch 2 innings all season already (about 50% into season).

Coaches have told her (and me unsolicited) she'll pitch a lot. But, it just isn't happening. Also told another girl she'd get chances to pitch and that has not happened yet either. The coaches are very focused on winning, inexperienced, and do very little if any skill work.

I am not sure if they are forgetting or don't think shes capable. She did fine with 2 strikeouts each of her 2 innings she's been allowed to pitch and the other girls (from my biased eye) are not any better than her -- the coaches just know them.

She's having Fun but is slightly (not overly) disappointed she isn't getting pitching time. DH says leave it alone, coach has shown he is full of BS with not following on promises, we'll get her lessons and change to travel in the fall or next spring.

We are more than halfway through season. They don't practice pitching at practice and don't ask the kids what they want to play. They do rotate ALL other positions -- except pitcher and catcher.

I'm very very frustrated. Thought it was a rec league, and not travel, and she'd get some experience at least trying pitching and maybe even catching, ... But maybe that doesn't matter. I hate to see her confidence go down.

[Anonymous]

Can she ask the coach to pitch? My kid is of similar age, different sport, and asks (reminds) coach about things they want to do/try all the time.

[Anonymous]

So, it sounds like she does get to play other positions, right? Many rec leagues have equal playing time guidelines. But if she is getting to play in games but just not as a pitcher, then the coach is probably meeting that guideline.

I think you just have to judge for yourself how the coach might respond to a request from you or her about more pitching time. It is probably best coming from her. But if you decide to talk to the coach yourself, I'd keep it casual and have no expectations.

[Anonymous]

Thanks for the responses -- good advice. I guess it's a lesson in self-advocacy.

The really annoying thing is the keep telling her she IS going to pitch this game-- and then not fulfilling the promise - either because the game ran out of time or they make a lineup change for whatever reason (maybe a close game, and they seem to perceive these 2 other girls as better.... I am not convinced they are better pitchers, but even if they are, I also don't think rec ball should be all about winning at this age).

Unfortunately my kid is pretty analytical and has decided she's not as good as these two girls, and now there's that much more pressure on her to perform (in her own head) to keep "earning" her very few pitching innings. Whereas when these other 2 girls have bad innings (and they do, a lot of times let in 4 runs and never throw a strike) it's just perceived as a bad inning for them. I think if she got up there and threw a bad inning she'd never get another chance on this rec team.

I think I am just going to consider this a wasted season, pitching wise, and go with lessons. And try to encourage her to self advocate if she really wants to pitch.

[Anonymous]

My brother had three kids who played baseball and softball in elementary schools. He told me if you want your kids to have a guaranteed chance to pitch or catch your kid either has to be physically larger than other kids or have a parent who is a coach or assistant coach. Or really, really be a standout player. What happens at younger ages is the coaches' kids get first chance at pitching, then physically big kids who have the potential to throw hard, then friends of the coaches' kids, then others. My 9 year old pitches not because he throws the hardest or is better than another kid who doesn't get the chance to pitch but because my husband is an assistant coach and he can throw strikes. Last year when kid pitch began he had the opportunity to pitch and learned to throw strikes. He got more chances than other kids. The kids that practiced pitching the most in games got more confident and pitched better. This year he doesn't worry if he has a bad inning because he knows he will pitch again so he is confident.
It totally isn't fair but rec ball isn't called "daddy ball" for nothing. The coaches' kids also have a better chance of making all stars so they end up practicing and playing more and really do get better. If you want to guarantee your kid gets to pitch, volunteer to coach or your daughter has to be way better than other pitchers on the team.

[Anonymous]

Thanks - great advice. Rings very, very true to me. Haha - had not heard that about daddy ball but you are 100% right.

I was also thinking about it and came to same conclusion.

The other option too is travel - better coaching.

[Anonymous]

I've got a tiny pitcher who is also overlooked at times. I totally agree with the advice you've gotten: First, encourage her to ask the coach directly. Secondly, get her some lessons in the off-season. Third, try travel next year. But even if she doesn't make the travel team, one more year with lessons + some time proving herself should help. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

We played one season of low level travel, and just FYI there was still "daddy ball" going on. We had a girl who was working hard, taking lessons, and a few times got put in as a "closer". She never, ever started or was 2nd pitcher. The coach's daughter was the weakest pitcher of the 3, and almost always was lead pitcher. It was kind of annoying, even with my daughter not a pitcher, because she definitely walked a lot of batters and we lost games because of it.

This year in rec ball, my husband is coaching and my daughter hardly ever pitches (though she can). She does, however, play a lot of 1st base and catcher, and has gotten a lot better with more time with the ball. She hardly ever got to touch the ball in travel as one of the weakest players on the team. In rec she shines and can hit the ball to the outfield (was scared stiff in travel with girls throwing 40+mph in 10U). She does get frustrated with beginner players at times, but I suspect that is how the travel team felt about her last year!

So there are tradeoffs. You can always request a different team next year in rec if you want to stay in rec.

[Anonymous]

Had a moment last night. My daughter's team has one very good pitcher. My daughter is second best. Last night, the best pitcher pitched the first two innings. Then a random girl who had never pitched before. Then the coach's daughter. Random girl and the coach's daughter walked EVERY. SINGLE. BATTER. They had held a lead through the first two innings, then, of course, lost.

This is rec, and I appreciate that he gives kids a chance to try pitching for the first time, but sometimes it bites them all in the butt.

[Anonymous]

Rec softball at 10U is a really tough age pitching-wise, largely because most of the pitching is really awful, and so games become walkathons. In fact many leagues make rule changes to either go to coach pitch after a certain number of walks just to keep things moving (and to require runs be scored on a batted ball rather than a walk).

So, if this team has two girls who can pitch well enough to get it over the plate and if they are just better than your daughter, it will be difficult for her. The best thing she can do is spend time pitching on her own -- the best pitchers go out with a tarp and a bucket of balls every day and throw 100 balls.

It's rec, yes, and every player should get every time. But pitching and catching really are skill positions. If you get players in those who really aren't good enough, it can drag the entire game down, and that hurts everyone. It's not about winning, it's about keeping players engaged enough that they keep coming back instead of moving to another sport.

[Anonymous]

OP here. Responding to 2 different people.

This is rec, and I appreciate that he gives kids a chance to try pitching for the first time, but sometimes it bites them all in the butt.

Fair point, but my daughter has pitched a lot. This is not a scenario where it is a kid who walks significantly more than the other 2 pitchers. It's a scenario in rec where they happen to have 3 "good" pitchers (for their age) and 2 of the kids get 99% of the time. And yeah it feels good to win, but long term player development and giving kids opportunities should be what rec is about. One of the 2 main girls who is "good" (and I use that term loosely because she also has a ton of walks and crazy wild pitches) was a terrible beginner pitcher last season but got tons of opportunities because her team had no one else -- and therefore improved -- and by the end of the season was starting to throw strikes. I think we just ended up on the wrong team. Most other teams don't even have one decent pitcher, let alone 2.

Rec softball at 10U is a really tough age pitching-wise, largely because most of the pitching is really awful, and so games become walkathons. In fact many leagues make rule changes to either go to coach pitch after a certain number of walks just to keep things moving (and to require runs be scored on a batted ball rather than a walk).

Yes. This is our league. No walks. So the coaches are out there pitching half the game.

So, if this team has two girls who can pitch well enough to get it over the plate and if they are just better than your daughter, it will be difficult for her. The best thing she can do is spend time pitching on her own -- the best pitchers go out with a tarp and a bucket of balls every day and throw 100 balls.

These are all good points. I am just counting down the days until this season is over and getting her other options.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Responding to 2 different people.

This is rec, and I appreciate that he gives kids a chance to try pitching for the first time, but sometimes it bites them all in the butt.

Fair point, but my daughter has pitched a lot. This is not a scenario where it is a kid who walks significantly more than the other 2 pitchers. It's a scenario in rec where they happen to have 3 "good" pitchers (for their age) and 2 of the kids get 99% of the time. And yeah it feels good to win, but long term player development and giving kids opportunities should be what rec is about. One of the 2 main girls who is "good" (and I use that term loosely because she also has a ton of walks and crazy wild pitches) was a terrible beginner pitcher last season but got tons of opportunities because her team had no one else -- and therefore improved -- and by the end of the season was starting to throw strikes. I think we just ended up on the wrong team. Most other teams don't even have one decent pitcher, let alone 2.

Rec softball at 10U is a really tough age pitching-wise, largely because most of the pitching is really awful, and so games become walkathons. In fact many leagues make rule changes to either go to coach pitch after a certain number of walks just to keep things moving (and to require runs be scored on a batted ball rather than a walk).

Yes. This is our league. No walks. So the coaches are out there pitching half the game.

So, if this team has two girls who can pitch well enough to get it over the plate and if they are just better than your daughter, it will be difficult for her. The best thing she can do is spend time pitching on her own -- the best pitchers go out with a tarp and a bucket of balls every day and throw 100 balls.

These are all good points. I am just counting down the days until this season is over and getting her other options.

I will say that in the league I used to work with (AGSA), by the time they're older, we started separating the known pitchers and catchers so they didn't bunch up on teams. It wasn't always popular, as girls wanted to stay with their friends and teams tended to be formed and stay together for multiple years in a row. But, by the time they are in 6th grade, they're getting split up.

[Anonymous]

Most rec softball rarely goes past 3-4 innings at that age because the pitching is so bad.

[Anonymous]

most other teams don't even have one decent pitcher, let alone 2.

Op here. Agreed. The pitching is so bad it's funny that any of them are considered good.
In the DC area I saw better quality instruction and better play on our rec league.
Here, our new state in our new league, not sure that any instruction is going on. But the coaches think we are in the MLB. They spend more time analyzing and plotting their line-up than they do planning practices or looking at developing technical skills.

[Anonymous]

meant to quote the other post "Most rec softball rarely goes past 3-4 innings at that age because the pitching is so bad."