DS went out and read the books that friend announced she's getting him

[Anonymous]

My friend is visiting us from out of town in May. She has two sons around my son's age, so she always has great ideas for books to get my son. A couple of weeks ago, she told me she had bought a book series for her sons, but turns out they had already read them. She asked if my son would be interested in them instead, as a gift. I told her my son hadn't read them yet, and we agreed she would keep the books and give them to DS when she vists. Unfortunately, my son was so excited to start the new series, that he's gone and borrowed (and mostly read) the series from his school library. When I told him that's not cool, he said 'that's ok, I wouldn't mind owning them too.' Now I don't know whether to tell my friend, or to not say anything, or to encourage my son to lie to her when she gifts them to him, or what? (We're not a white-lie type of family.) Very awkward situation. WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Man I wish I had this level of problem. Your life sounds so ideal and blissful.

Signed, Mom of 3 teens who give me real problems on the daily

[Anonymous]

Here's the likely way this turns out.

Friend: "Here are the books."
Your son: "Awesome, thanks!"
You: "Thanks so much, that's very kind of you."

Here's the worst case scenario:

Friend: "Here are the books. You haven't read them, right?"
Your son: "Uh, thanks... I mean...umm..."
You: "Thanks so much, that's very kind of you. He got so excited to read them after he heard about them that he jumped the gun and got some from the library. He said he'd love to have them to reread, though."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man I wish I had this level of problem. Your life sounds so ideal and blissful.

Signed, Mom of 3 teens who give me real problems on the daily

How is this helpful?

[Anonymous]

If your kids are like my kids, they read books several times and are delighted to own books they've already checked out and read.

[Anonymous]

You are creating a problem where there is none. Go volunteer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My friend is visiting us from out of town in May. She has two sons around my son's age, so she always has great ideas for books to get my son. A couple of weeks ago, she told me she had bought a book series for her sons, but turns out they had already read them. She asked if my son would be interested in them instead, as a gift. I told her my son hadn't read them yet, and we agreed she would keep the books and give them to DS when she vists. Unfortunately, my son was so excited to start the new series, that he's gone and borrowed (and mostly read) the series from his school library. When I told him that's not cool, he said 'that's ok, I wouldn't mind owning them too.' Now I don't know whether to tell my friend, or to not say anything, or to encourage my son to lie to her when she gifts them to him, or what? (We're not a white-lie type of family.) Very awkward situation. WWYD?

Re-read this.

Your friend wanted to give your son some great books. He got them from the library, read them, agrees they're great, and looks forward to having his own copies when your friend gives them to him. So what's the problem, here?

[Anonymous]

What's the great series?

I actually agree it's awkward, but only because the friend declined to give them to her own kids because they had already read them. Would then be weird to give them to another kid who had already read them. I agree to just say thanks enthusiastically. Not mentioning he already them is not the same as a white lie.

[Anonymous]

I have to admit I do this all the time. People rave about a book, and tell me they'll pass it on to me when they are done. I read like a fiend, and I always want new books. I often can't resist and go get the book myself. If the person seems pleased to give the book, I do what PP mentioned: "Thank you so much! How thoughtful of you! The reviews have been fantastic, haven't they?" If I am busted, I am busted, and I apologize and say their glowing review made me so exited I couldn't wait. I also think of books as pass-along things - I have only so many bookshelves, so when new books come in old books must go out...so I try to have a steady movement of good books going out to other people. So I don't think of a book like I do a vase, something you give and it stays where you gave it. Don't make your son feel bad, OP. Its not reasonable to rave about a book and then make a kid wait too long for it!

[Anonymous]

I always say it’s polite to say thank you for a gift whether or not you like it. They were thoughtful and generous to think of you. I don’t think that’s a white lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man I wish I had this level of problem. Your life sounds so ideal and blissful.

Signed, Mom of 3 teens who give me real problems on the daily

Go away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your kids are like my kids, they read books several times and are delighted to own books they've already checked out and read.

+1. Oldest reads and re-reads his favorite books all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your kids are like my kids, they read books several times and are delighted to own books they've already checked out and read.

+1

Plus, he'll be able to truthfully say "I love this series and now I'm so happy to have my own copies"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Man I wish I had this level of problem. Your life sounds so ideal and blissful.

Signed, Mom of 3 teens who give me real problems on the daily

Go away.

I get this is an annoying response and not helpful at all, but I must admit this is what I thought in my head after reading the OP.

[Anonymous]

Skirting the issue without lying:
“My friends love this series!”
“Now I can read and reread them”
“People say the middle one is the best”
“Did your boys enjoy them?”