The birds and the bees

[Anonymous]

I think I am behind on this. I have an almost 8 year old and he does not know anything about sex. I bought “It’s Not the Stork” but do one of us have to read it to him or can I just give it to him? He is a voracious reader and reads all kinds of non-fiction, even text books and reference books. Generally do dad’s have the talk with sons and moms with daughters when parents of both sex are involved?

[Anonymous]

It's like you were frozen in time from the 50's!

I've been talking to my kids about how a baby comes into the world, how it grows, and how it is produced since they were two. We go over it a couple of times a year, each time adding more detail as they're ready to hear it.

My daughters have asked their father questions about menstruation. The kids have asked questions about conception at the dinner table. Whoever is asked, answers.

We have read books WITH the kids, and given them the books to read through on their own as well.

[Anonymous]

OP here. To my credit, I have answered all the questions asked. I have no idea why but my son has never asked how the baby comes to be inside the mother in the first place. He has known for a couple years how the baby comes out. I admit I’m late but I also doubt the norm is talking to two year olds about sex.

[Anonymous]

OP, It's Not The Stork is a good book. Leave it somewhere where you'll know if he took it/read it. Wait a while for him to ask questions. Answer the questions he asks.

There shouldn't be any such thing as "the talk". It has to be an on-going conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's like you were frozen in time from the 50's!

I've been talking to my kids about how a baby comes into the world, how it grows, and how it is produced since they were two. We go over it a couple of times a year, each time adding more detail as they're ready to hear it.

My daughters have asked their father questions about menstruation. The kids have asked questions about conception at the dinner table. Whoever is asked, answers.

We have read books WITH the kids, and given them the books to read through on their own as well.

Omg you are so progressive and with it! Why can’t we all be so enlightened like you are? Man, you are so cool, pp! Tell us more, please. Your life sounds fascinating. Even your husband talks about periods with his daughters! I’m super impressed.

[Anonymous]

Op, I also bought it’s not the stork. I left it out and waited for my kids to ask questions. They are 5 and 7. When they asked I simply brought over the book and read it with them.

I think it’s fine to follow his lead. He will ask when he’s ready. Just make sure he knows the basics.

[Anonymous]

OP quite frankly do you want your child comfortable to come talk to you about anything? Literally anything? If the answer is yes then go through the dang book WITH him. If you don't care, prefer he don't, then yes, leave it anywhere for him to find and he will probably figure it out.

[Anonymous]

Jeez my 5 year old has had that book for 2 years now, knows where babies come from and roughly how they are made (age appropriate language). Yes you are behind in so much as your son may know more from his friends than you prefer lol. Get off your ass and be a parent!

[Anonymous]

Just let him read it himself. School will teach him more than you'd even want to teach him. My DD has not heard much of anything about the birds and the bees. The other day she asked me a question and I told her about periods. She said she already learned about that, that it goes at the end of a sentence!

[Anonymous]

I'll be honest. I've always answered questions when they come up - simply answers - elaborated when asked, but my DS (8) has not been too curious. My DD (8) on the other hand pieced enough together from the questions I answered and sat down with me one day with more specific questions so we had the talk. I bought both the Stork book and American Girl book. I need to have the talk with my DS but I need to find a better resource/book or entry for more of a discussion.

[Anonymous]

I’ve got the “It’s Not the Stork” series. I read it to my son when he was much younger. Now I generally read through each higher level book with him once or twice, to answer any questions he may have. But he reads it himself, too.

I bring these books out for him every couple of months and suggest that he reads them again. He’s 12. I told him there is a lot of incorrect information out there on the street. And YouTube. Better he know the real deal than the urban legend stuff.

[Anonymous]

My kids read it's not the stork and the actual part where they baby is made didn't stick with them. Then I found my 1984 copy of "Where did I come from?" and they read that with glee many times and are now "experts". That book is hysterical and holds up 35 years later!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just let him read it himself. School will teach him more than you'd even want to teach him. My DD has not heard much of anything about the birds and the bees. The other day she asked me a question and I told her about periods. She said she already learned about that, that it goes at the end of a sentence!

One reason to be proactive, even though school will teach a lot of the biology, is that as your kid gets to 9, 10, 11, you are going to need to start to talk about things like consent, or protecting themselves from seeing pornography online. It is pretty hard to explain what porn is, and why you don't want to see it, if you haven't gotten the kid good and comfortable talking about sex young. When we tried to introduce (gently) this stuff when my son was about 9 he was utterly perplexed as to why people would look at naked pictures on the internet, or why someone would touch someone else sexually AT ALL. We had forgotten to talk about pleasure! We had just introduced the mechanics. My point is just that there is a whole world of stuff you are going to need to talk to your tween about, and it is much, much easier (and makes more sense) if you aren't doing the initial sex talk at the same time. They need the basics before they can absorb the social/internet element of sexuality.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's like you were frozen in time from the 50's!

I've been talking to my kids about how a baby comes into the world, how it grows, and how it is produced since they were two. We go over it a couple of times a year, each time adding more detail as they're ready to hear it.

My daughters have asked their father questions about menstruation. The kids have asked questions about conception at the dinner table. Whoever is asked, answers.

We have read books WITH the kids, and given them the books to read through on their own as well.

As progressive and wonderful as you are, you're still an asshole. So work on that because your kids will learn it from you.

The OP asked a question. Your response is obnoxious.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's like you were frozen in time from the 50's!

I've been talking to my kids about how a baby comes into the world, how it grows, and how it is produced since they were two. We go over it a couple of times a year, each time adding more detail as they're ready to hear it.

My daughters have asked their father questions about menstruation. The kids have asked questions about conception at the dinner table. Whoever is asked, answers.

We have read books WITH the kids, and given them the books to read through on their own as well.

As progressive and wonderful as you are, you're still an asshole. So work on that because your kids will learn it from you.

The OP asked a question. Your response is obnoxious.

But it made her feel SO GOOD about herself to write that. (And I have a feeling the PP might need that for some reason.)